Yesterday, I forced my cranky self to go for a walk in the spring air with my husband. As we were chatting, I mentioned that I felt like my head was SWIRLING with all the to-dos I have ahead of me, and he sagely suggested that I write them down. Well. Writing them down helps, but it does not STOP the swirling.
What also helps is to squawk and flap at you. I know you are either going through something similar, or you know exactly what it feels like, or you have kind and/or wise and/or distracting words.
Because I have a fondness for alliteration, especially in post titles, I was looking for a synonym for “chaos / pandemonium / overwhelm” that began with an S, and I came across the word “shemozzle.” The word itself is a little sillier than how I feel; there’s something about the “ozzle” that makes me want to giggle. Say “shemozzle” out loud, it’s delightful. That very silliness is what makes it perfect. I may feel on the knife’s edge of a panic attack, but I’m panicking about silly inconsequential stuff when the world at large is full of so many massive, significant events, and “shemozzle” helps me remember that.
The first and most uncomfortable shemozzle / source of shemozzle / I have no real idea how to use this word: SUMMER.
I have finally gotten my ass into gear and started thinking about summer camp, and summer feels really, really close, and I have next to zero things planned, and the whole thing stresses me right out. Also, I spent – no exaggeration – SIX HOURS this weekend trying to research camps and fit them into the calendar and talk through them with Carla. Which is all to say that I acknowledge the many privileges and a blessings of a life in which a) I have six hours to devote to summer camp research and b) the wealth of options available to me is so extensive and c) summer camp is neither a necessity nor a hardship.
Summer camp, of course, is all tangled up in summer travel plans. (Shemozzle Two.) My husband and I are apparently inhabiting one of those logic puzzles: Suzanne wants to be in X place for Y days, her husband wants to be in X place for Z days, their daughter needs to be picked up from camp on Day Z, and they have to cross a river in a leaky boat with a hungry shark. How can Suzanne be two places at once without losing a limb?
Plus, summer has a bunch of Unknown Factors that could influence things like Which Camp Is Best and Will Our Travel Plans Work for People Besides Us, and I don’t know when the Factors will become Known and airline tickets continue to climb and also Carla’s birthday is in there somewhere and she’s been through nearly a school year’s worth of bar and bat mitzvahs that have conveyed the idea that Thirteen Is a Seriously Important Birthday but I’m not sure what besides “getting a phone” (no) or “elaborate party and religious ceremony” (also no) meets her expectations of what a Seriously Important Birthday might involve. [Edited to add: NOTE OF CLARITY – I am not opposed to phones for people’s children. A phone is not right for my particular child at this particular time, but there are many excellent and valid reasons for kids to have phones at age thirteen or even younger.]
Listen, I am well accustomed to the turmoil of Pell-Mell May, but it is still March, if only for another day, and I AM NOT READY FOR THIS LEVEL OF SHEMOZZLE.
Shall we turn to another, more pressing issue? Which is that this is a holiday week, and I am hosting one of the week’s holidays and yet I somehow still have to also feed my family on the non-holiday days.
Dinners for the Week of March 30-April 5
- Fire Fry: My husband requested this, and if someone else is going to suggest a meal, I’m going to make it. Doesn’t hurt that fire fry is delicious.
- Salmon Rice Bowls: I think I’m going to make the salmon in the air fryer, as in this recipe, rather than fussing with a skillet.
- Ground Beef Tacos: It’s been a minute since we’ve had tacos around here, and I’m in the mood for a Taco Tuesday.
- Sesame Ginger Stir Fry: I think I’m feeling brave enough to try making tofu again, and this recipe sounds like the perfect incentive to attempt it.
- Sheet Pan Chicken Tostadas: Is this too similar to tacos? Too bad.
We’ve been invited to join family friends for a Passover Seder, so that’s another night I don’t have to think about. And then I’m hosting Easter dinner. I think I’ll make a pork loin with a warm farro and veggie salad on the side. My husband has requested a cake for dessert, and has narrowed down his cake desires to a coconut cake or a carrot cake. I have never made either, and I’m always up for a cake challenge. Do you have a preference? And, if so, do you have a favorite recipe for either?
Speaking of Easter… my kid is twelve… do I still need to do the whole Easter bunny/Easter basket thing? Just the idea of thinking about it is making me weary. Are we still hiding plastic eggs all over the house? Do we need to dye eggs? Surely we should have at least a small Easter basket, right? My husband has always insisted that Easter is not a gift-giving holiday, and yet… I’ve always striven to fill my kid’s Easter basket with as many non-candy items as I can, while still trying to make it fun and exciting.
I wonder if I could get away with filling up an Easter basket with practical things, like these cute jeans Carla wants, or a new skort, or a duffel bag. I bet she would love a variety pack of spring-ish earrings. She’s been more interested in cooking for herself lately, and I’ve been stressing about SPORTS SNACKS, so perhaps a cookbook would be both fun and useful? Books are always a good gift compromise – if only Rosanne Perry’s newest novel had already come out! Carla loved attending Jeopardy! as an audience member over spring break; maybe she would enjoy a book of Jeopardy! games, or a book of trivia, or maybe even this inside peek at the show? Of course, I am also eyeing fun and silly things for Carla’s Easter basket, like these hand-holding socks or these fingernail markers or a stuffed ostrich. My child does NOT need any more stuffed animals, but the ostrich is adorable… and you know what is MORE ADORABLE is this stuffed Pallas cat OMG I want it so much. Carla also loves the latest fidget toys – she was eyeballing this squishy stick of butter at a friend’s house. Oh my goodness, she would get such a kick out of this tic-tac-toe wall hanging. Okay, now I am getting carried away. Let’s save it for her birthday, Suzanne.
I suppose I can at the very least buy some candy the next time I go to the grocery store. And maybe I will consider buying a bag of bunny farts. Carla does love both cotton candy and fart jokes, so it seems like a guaranteed win.
Ahhhhh to-do lists! There are always so many things in the air to juggle. Good luck with all of it!
Your meals sound great – my vote is carrot cake, but I haven’t made a coconut one for a while so….hmmmm…yes I’m behaving like this is a cake I am going to make and eat, what of it. I don’t think you can go wrong either way BUT my vote skews towards carrots, if only for the cute carrot/ bunny theme of the holiday. Personally I am making coconut chocolate nests to put Mini Eggs into. But it’s only the four of us (I think, Mark is out of town but I believe he comes back on Sunday)
My kids did have phones at that age, actually earlier, since I got them phones when I started teaching yoga, so Jake was in grade six. I don’t think we allowed them a whole bunch of apps though, like they didn’t have social media until much later. You know what, I can’t remember what all happened. IT WAS A WHILE AGO! I can’t even remember what happened yesterday.
Chocolate coconut nests! So cute! I bet my kid would be really into making those… perhaps I will have to rethink.
I have many friends whose kids have phones already or who have had phones for years! I think a lot of kids do great with phones, I just know that it would be a massive distraction and point of conflict in our family.
Nom nom fire fry! I can’t exactly figure out what it is, but with a name like that, it has to be good.
I have a strong opinion about Easter baskets based on my own household: we still do them in the college years. I think last year Hubs was in favor of skipping them but I had already gotten candy, so we did them very last minute and the boys raved about them. Kids are so funny.
Writing stuff down is always good advice, but when it’s written down and you’re still in freak out mode…it’s time to write a blog post. Achievement unlocked!
Fire fry is steak marinated in spiced yogurt, simmered with some onions (and bell peppers, if you are me), and served over rice. IT IS SO GOOD.
I like that you have a strong opinion about Easter baskets. Much better than ambivalence!
We did phones at 13 because that’s when kids could babysit younger siblings and we don’t have a home phone. However, we do a Gabb phone for the first couple years – no internet access 🙂
I still do Easter baskets (no egg hunts anymore) for my kids aged 23 down to 9. The college kids get grocery store delivery of candy and snacks and treats, easy peasy!
12 years old is a weird age when it comes to summer camps. We have an almost 12 year old boy and he doesn’t want to do any of the normal summer camps anymore, just sports focused shorter camps, sigh. Our Catholic high school puts on 1/2 day camps in all the sports and STEM and Study Skills and Drama and Music, etc so we use those. Maybe you could look into private schools near you?
I love that all the kids still get Easter baskets! No one is too old for Easter fun.
I think I miscommunicated my issue — it is an issue of OVERabundance. We have so many choices! Which is fabulous, but makes things complicated because of so many overlapping start and end dates.
I’m stressy about Easter baskets for my 18 and 21-year-olds! I shouldn’t be; they’ll be happy with some candy and Visa gift cards, which is, so far, about all I’ve come up with. Maybe some college-logo stuff for the college-bound 18yo. With a boy and a girl it feels so unfair – I could go wild with makeup and beauty stuff for her, but what’s the equally-fun guy stuff? I have no idea.
Anyway, just saying I FEEL YOU.
For our Easter dinner I’m doing chicken cordon bleu this year, a first. With deviled eggs, caesar salad, probably green beans, and roasted potatoes. And making a lime pie for dessert, although your carrot cake idea now has me reconsidering. 😉
Ooooh a lime pie sounds yummy! I would much prefer that to a carrot cake. I love that your kids get gift cards! And college logo stuff sounds very fun and celebratory.
So many plans to organize and decisions to make–I’m overwhelmed for you. I just spent weeks debating/agonizing/stressing myself out about choosing an Apple Watch. I’ve been borrowing an old one of my son-in-law’s to see if I liked it, but then it came time to DECIDE. on buying one of my own. (too many options) Your decisions are much more complicated than mine since you have more people (and their schedules) to consider. Regarding the cake: I’m a huge carrot cake fan and there are recipes that also have coconut in them. My favorite cake is hummingbird though. You wouldn’t like it since it’s banana. 🙂
Right?! Sometimes an abundance of choices makes things WAY more difficult!
I do not care for carrot cake OR coconut cake either, Margaret! This is purely for my husband.
I remember the year my MIL didn’t put eggs out for Maya to find. She was wistful, ‘my childhood is over’, but not really sad. Like, I don’t think she wanted to do the hunt. We (I, no one else ever helps with these things, which is fine because no one else cares, but yeah…) used to do a family Easter basket with gifts for everyone. Usually clothes, a bottle of wine, some candy, maybe a book. Instead of buying my daughter new stuffed animals once she had way too many, I would just sneak all of the Easter type animals from her room, and they would go in the basket. She was always happy to see them there.
My vote is for carrot cake, though I always eyeball coconut cake at the bakery. We had a delicious carrot cake for Maya’s birthday party on Saturday. So good. I have a recipe on my blog if you want to try it. It is not the one we had this year, my BIL got one from a trusted bakery, which I always fully support as I don’t love baking. I won’t be offended if you don’t try mine. Jellyjules.com/birthday-cake.
Shemozzle – that makes me think of the theme song from Laverne and Shirley. I always thought it was a made up word.
“My childhood is over”!!!!! SOB! I ended up asking my kid what her expectations for Easter are, and she told me she is too old for an egg hunt. PHEW!
YES, I am going to search up your recipe for carrot cake! Thank you!
Okay, ONE: I very much enjoy “What also helps is to squawk and flap at you.” I find that helpful myself.
TWO: Significant Birthdays. What I have found not only helpful but enjoyable is to sit down with the kid in question, list out the things people do to celebrate the birthday in question, list the reasons we can/will not do those things, and ask what the kid thinks would be a good equivalent. SO FAR this has not backfired on me (“I think we should rent a circus!”), but I do not wish to guarantee the results. But, like, when I was 16 I got a special silver bracelet from my parents, and it was really fun to talk with each kid about how I really liked that and remembered it, and ask what similar thing they might want to mark their 16th. One wanted a watch; one wanted birthstone earrings; one wanted nothing; etc.
THIRD. Easter. At this point, I buy a lot of Easter candy and mail four packages to the Away kids, and we are still planning to hide an Easter basket for the one Home kid, but in a tongue-in-cheek way. The rest of the candy will go in two baskets (one for fruity candy, one for chocolate candy) on the kitchen counter, and done. We are not doing egg hunts anymore; we stopped after the year MOST of the kids sat it out, and the ones who hunted seemed to be doing it out of obligation; we would have been willing to do it longer if people were into it, but it is a LOT of work, so the low enthusiasm canceled it. You should do whatever feels pleasantly festive but not overwhelming to you. I am Team No Gifts for Easter, but if gifts for Easter is fun, I’m Team Do It.
I think I am leaning toward No Gifts for Easter. Or maybe… One Gift for Easter.
I do like the idea of laying out all the birthday options, as it were, and seeing what she would be into. I do think “rent a circus” might be on the list, though, so… perhaps I shall offer some boundaries.
I used to hate camp registration season, so stressful. Now the kid handles the stressful process of finding a summer job. The circle of life…
I printed that stir-fry recipe before I finished reading the post.
I just made an Easter basket for my 20 year old (just candy) and gave it to them the day they left to go back to school after spring break. Considered hiding it, but didn’t. If I’d thought of it, we might have dyed eggs while they were home, but we didn’t. Still might, with the 25 year old.
Ha! I bet the summer job cycle has its own stresses, as a parent!
Oh, wow. I just got my own son’s age wrong. He won’t be 25 until May.
Summer planning has to happen *waves wildly in the air* like TWO SEASONS AHEAD OF SUMMER. Camp registration for where my kids go opens at the beginning of January, so you are literally trying to book something 6+ months out. It’s… ridiculous. I get it’s kinda how it has to work, but I find it so stressful to plan that far in advance. That said, I was also the person ON MY PHONE at 7:30PM on JANUARY 7th when registration opened. Haha.
We don’t do anything for Easter in terms of presents or baskets and I LOVE it. That said, I remember being very jealous of my best friend growing up who had an elaborate egg hunt and basket.
We are mostly cooking the same crowd pleasers on repeat right now.
Speaking of which, the larder is bare so I need to go to the grocery store. I have to admit I LOVE that I can walk to one in under 5 minutes in Europe and just get enough food for a few days. Much prefer that to schlepping in my car and getting a much bigger order.
Oh, and I forgot to weigh in on cake. I think it is impossible to beat cream cheese frosting, so my vote would be carrot cake, which also just sounds very “easter-y” but I have no doubt coconut cake would be utterly delicious. Which one do you feel like making (or ordering?). Go for that!
SUMMER PLANNING IS THE WORST. I *knew* about the January planning thing, because I have been planning summer camp for nearly a decade, and this year I just ignored it, as though it would resolve itself. And now I am quite irritated with Past Suzanne for putting me in this predicament!
Yes, cream cheese frosting is the best frosting of all. I have to say that factors quite a lot in my decision making as well.
Easter basket for the oldies are always a good idea, but I’d make it smaller, maybe one chocolate egg (or similar) and a small bit of a favorite candy or decorated cookie; maybe goldfish packets or similar. I always used to get marinated herring and green olives in my Easter baskets as a kid but I was a weird child. Games, earrings, a cookbook or any book is a good idea; lip gloss or chapstick, hair doo-dads if she’s into that. We’re still at the egg-hunt stage for the little grandboys (7 and 9) (see the current blog) but who knows how long that will go on! I’m doing Easter dinner — shrimp and grits, asparagus, deviled eggs. I was thinking about scalloped potatoes because that’s tradition (along with ham, which I can’t eat for another month) but that was WAY too many carbs!
Have a wonderful holiday!
Marinated herring and green olives! I love that. There have been times when a jar of capers has appeared in my kid’s Christmas stocking, so I get it. If the grandboys are like my kid, the egg hunt may stop at age 12; I asked her this morning and she says she is too old.
Please do squawk and flap! It is necessary and beneficial in today’s world.
The word “shemozzle” reminded me of the opening to the sitcom Laverne and Shirley which starts with “One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Schlemiel! Schlimazel! Hasenpfeffer Incorporated!” “Shemozzle” is related to “schilmazel” but the former refers to a situation that is chaotic (bad luck) and the latter refers to an unlucky person. I hope to use both those words more in the future. And you are now unlucky that you had to read through all that.
Your Easter dinner menu sounds delicious! And yeah, how dare the family need to eat for any other meals other than the special ones!
My favorite Easter tradition to do with my Jewishly-raised children was dying Easter eggs. Writing the person’s name on the egg in clear crayon. The dye kit, the colored tablets, the vinegar. And then hiding the eggs in the yard and/or house (depending on the weather) and hoping I remembered where they all were hid.
Good luck with the camp and vacation decisions. It is a time consuming process, with many unknowns, and I sympathize.
I vote for carrot cake.
Carrot cake it is, then! You are the deciding vote. 🙂
I love knowing more about shemozzle, and I love that it’s related in some way to the word shlemiel.
I am relieved that summers are still straight forward and kind of easy for me. The boys both go to the school summer program with one week of camp put on by our church each month. Our summer vacation is always a week at my parents and then the boys stay for an extra week since we have a childcare gap. I have to lock all of this in super early because of camp registration time lines. And our August trip is always the 2nd to last week of summer break. So it’s very much a cookie cutter summer. BUT when Paul ages out of the summer program, I am not sure what I will do. But that’s a problem for future Lisa to figure out.
I have not gotten them anything for their baskets because swim suits so that’s my top to do item when I get back from this trip (at the airport in the delta lounge now as I type this). We are very much minimalists for holidays. They always get a swimsuit and then their favorite candies and I call it good. This morning Paul told his cousins ‘we don’t really make a big deal out of holidays’. But then he listed Ramadan and Hannukah. So I had to interject and say we don’t celebrate holidays that are not meaningful for us so my nieces didn’t think I was a failure as a mother (they are 5 and almost 3 so not really judging me but boy did it raise my hair to hear Paul say that!!). But he is kind of right. We don’t do a damn thing for St. Patrick’s day. Or April fools. Or you name it. We do something small for the meaningful holidays (for us). I just get tired of the production around holidays! I don’t feel like it was such a production for us 80s kids!
Dammit, I DID have a really good recipe for a coconut cake with some kind of raspberry cream icing, but that was years ago and who knows where I got it.
Fire fry sounds really cool. I made a new recipe this week that I got from my sister when I was visiting and she made it for dinner the night I got there. For some reason I can’t post the link but it’s One skillet lemon butter chicken and orzo from the Half Baked Harvest website, with spinach instead of kale.
I just bought chocolate for my 23 years old daughter and 21 year old nephew and so did my mom and sister, so clearly I will be of no use here. I vote for chocolate and an activity book and stuffed thing or fidget toy.
I’ve made a lot of carrot cakes! The Dorie Greenspan carrot cake recipe is indeed classic and five stars for a reason! I omit the nuts/raisins if/as needed for the audience, but “extra classic” with them. Great occasion cake.
https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/1015523-carrot-cake?unlocked_article_code=1.XVA.8Vgo.EVoo62ieFnjA&smid=ck-recipe-iOS-share&cgs=c
Somewhat randomly, this recipe from a 90s-era Cooking Light cookbook also stands out. Moist and fruity and an easy one-layer.
https://www.food.com/recipe/my-favorite-cooking-light-carrot-cake-353570#recipe
Well- there’s a lot to complain about with a 17 year old, but one thing I don’t have to stress about is summer. She’s getting a job. Boom- done. She actually wants to do this, so it all works out. Also, our big trip will be to Indiana for my son’s wedding. The good thing about that is, the dates are set in stone, and even if the airfare is super expensive, we just have to say “it costs what it costs” and move on.
For Easter- my daughter will still get an Easter basket, with candy and practical things- some sandals she’s been wanting and maybe a shirt or two. I did look at that stuffed ostrich (she still likes stuffed animals and does NOT have an ostrich) but it says it won’t arrive by Easter. There, another decision made for me.
We’re making a carrot cake today to celebrate Muffins birthday! Muffin won’t be eating it, other than a couple licks of frosting.
Speaking of birthdays… THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE CARD! It’s still being displayed on my living room shelf. Yes, that cat does look like Leo!
We drive back from spring break tomorrow and I feel like life will kick into gear then and I am not sure I’m ready. I’ve gotta get started on Curly’s grad video and her graduation invites. I still do the paper version. While on break, I got an email about the summer school classes (mostly fun/enrichment options), and I am not prepared to choose which sessions will work for us. Nothing is nailed down. Will mini get a job? When can I get Rae into a drivers Ed class? Eek.
I was thinking exactly this today on the beach: I think I am ready to be down with Easter baskets. That tic tac toe game is very cute though.
My best friend is right now in the thick of figuring out the summer camp issue, and I do not envy her. She has a very detailed spreadsheet! It seems so complicated. Things weren’t this complicated when I was a kid… right??? Wait, I don’t think I can say that when I’m not the one who was trying to figure it all out. So maybe it was!
My mom did Easter baskets for my brother and me last year, which was fun! But they generally stopped around high school, I think.
In true form to our family’s sense of humor, a few years ago my daughters told me ” if you don’t give us an Easter Basket, we’re putting you in a home”. LOL. One year way back when, I could not find them anywhere. I was so overwhelmed and frustrated that I used a plastic grocery bag as a basket. Now they call them “Easter Wegmans Bag Baskets” (Wegmans is a grocery store chain here in Central New York).
This is super-late, but I am stuck on the fact that Carla was in the Jeopardy! audience??? Did I read that correctly? Were you there, too? Talk about #lifegoals.
Also, carrot and coconut are two of my least favorite cakes, so I am glad I did not get the chance to weigh in.
Also also, I am stressed about Summer and Travel and Options For Training/Courses/Etc. and…it’s just me. So, go you. You’re not only raising a human, you’re raising a human and giving that human amazing experiences that relate to said human’s interests. If that’s not good parenting, I don’t know what is. <3