The thing is, for all my Big Dinner Plans from last week, I think I ended up making dinner twice. And once it was tacos and the other time it was pizza. The rest of it was convenience food from the freezer or from a variety of restaurants.
We’ve had a pair of painters in the house for going on three weeks (this should be the last week, thank goodness). They are lovely people – quiet and friendly and good at their work. But I am deeply uncomfortable with strangers in my space. Additionally, the painters have been entering and exiting via the garage, which means they go through the kitchen semi-frequently. I find myself feeling Very Awkward about making food, including lunch, and have been unable to bring myself to prep anything for dinner while they are around, because they are either traveling right through the cooking space or working in/near it. (To allay at least some of the awkwardness, on my end at least, I have been bringing in occasional treats – donuts or some other pastry-type thing for breakfast maybe twice a week, cookies a couple of times, and last week I brought them lunch from a local shop.) (Should I be buying them lunch and/or breakfast every day???? Sometimes I’m not here during those parts of the day, and what if they are just eating what I provide out of politeness???? Also, feeding two additional people one or two meals a day for 15 days seems… excessive???? Or am I being selfish and cheap???????)
ANYWAY. I have not been making dinner with any sort of regularity, so the list below is highly aspirational. Especially because this is a Call Week, and my husband is unlikely to be home before 8:00 or 9:00 pm on any given day.
Dinners for the Week of October 16-22
- French Onion Soup: I already possess all the ingredients for this soup, so making it should be easy. But I was planning to make it yesterday and then got too tired from errands/football watching, so it didn’t happen. Hopefully I can drum up the enthusiasm to make it soon, though, because the leftovers are good and easy to heat up. (I do have some minor anxiety about whether my house will smell oniony once I make the soup, and whether that will bother the painters, even though logically I know they probably don’t care at all and just want me to make the occasional muffin available to them and then render myself invisible for the rest of the time they are in my house.)
- Sheet Pan Chicken with Zucchini: I grabbed some zucchini the other day, thinking it was such an easy vegetable to cook, and I already have chicken breasts in the freezer, awaiting their time in the sun, and having the ingredients to SUCH an easy meal on hand would give me NO excuse to resort to takeout. And yet the zucchini and the chicken remain unprepared and uneaten. Just move the chicken from the freezer to the fridge! Just wash the zucchini! That is 40% of the work right there!
- Oven Baked Pork Chops with Steamed Broccoli: Pork chops were on sale so I bought some because apparently Me In The Grocery Store is a totally different and much more with-it person than Me In My Well-Stocked Kitchen. I also have broccoli in the fridge I was supposed to eat last week. This is another extremely easy meal that I may still be unable to persuade myself to make.
- Some Sort of Curry: My husband and I had a date night recently during which we went to a massive Asian market a few towns over. We had so much fun wandering the aisles and picking out fun things to try (my favorite were the wasabi flavored Lays potato chips – yum!). Among the many things we bought were a few tubs of curry. I have some assorted veg in the fridge and plenty of meat options. Maybe I’ll try out one of the curry mixes.
Time will tell whether I make any of these things, seeing as my intentions are even more halfhearted than usual.
If you meal plan, about what percentage of the meals on your list end up Made And Eaten by the end of the week?
If you were to go on a food shopping and preparation date, what type of food would you shop for and what would you want to make?
You should NOT be providing them breakfast and lunch, what you are providing them is pure kindness! I am sure they appreciate it so much! I don’t think any tradesperson would expect that at all, so that is just so sweet of you! It’s really kind and thoughtful but NOT required at all. I’m sure they are thrilled to be thought of in this way!
But I do know your feelings of awkwardness! However, they are around this kind of thing all the time, if that makes you feel better. I’m sure they are super used to working around other people being home.
That makes me feel MUCH better, because ACK.
It is so awkward. I am trying to do laundry and do my writing and I am SURE you are right and they are used to it and probably are paying zero attention to me, but it feels like having someone evaluating my every move. Also I made what seems to have been a strategic error by coming into the basement to work, because now one of them is working at the top of the stairs and I don’t know if I can leave without disturbing him????
I have never once fed people who were working in my house; I don’t think they expect that at all. You’re so thoughtful to offer them something!
I usually make about 60%-70% of my weekly meal plan, and I’ve finally learned NOT to plan a meal for every night. At LEAST one night, usually 2, are left blank because I know we need to eat up leftovers AND will want to go the easy route sometimes.
A food prep date sounds kinda fun! Esp. since my DH hardly ever goes grocery shopping anymore. If we were to do that, I would want to take him to a grocery store that I know well but he’s never been to (in my case Aldi or Sprouts), just to show him all the “fun” things. 😉
It was fun! And yes, totally fun to show your spouse around a place that’s unfamiliar to them!
I am impressed by your 60-70% completion rate. That is something to strive for, for sure!
I also am very uncomfortable having people working in the house. I always offer water, but I’m pretty sure they don’t expect anything. I’m sure they’ve been loving the things you provided- you’re showing a level of consideration most people probably don’t. Good luck with the dinners this week!
Yes, water — definitely. (Although I kind of stopped offering that after the first couple of days and they didn’t take me up on it…)
I rarely veer from my planned meals. There are probably two reasons for that. 1) Even though I cook more than anyone else in the family, I am only responsible for planning 3 meals a week. 2) And I am not good at thinking on my feet, so even if I don’t really feel up to cooking, the idea of coming up with another idea can seem harder than going with the planned one. When the kids were younger, though, and my time was harder to manage, I would ditch meals more often.
I am not good at thinking on my feet either. The other day I listed out all the proteins and veg we had to my husband because I could not get them to click together into a meal. Ugh.
I am also suuupppper uncomfortable having people working in my house. I usually offer cold water and that’s about it and even that they tend to mostly ignore.
I’ve had some really unfortunate experiences (once someone – a painter coincidentally – told me he had assaulted his daughter over the weekend and was about to be arrested; another time someone verbally abused me, walked off the job site, and then drove by our house slowly after we told the lead contractor he couldn’t come back)…so I think it is VERY important not to get to “close” to people working in my home now. Thankfully, we’ve had much better experiences in recent years, but they have…um…traumatized me for sure 😐
Can’t wait to see the finished paint job!
Elisabeth! That sounds awful! I am so sorry those things happened to you! No wonder you are traumatized about having people in your home. 🙁
ACK! Elisabeth, that’s horrible!
I love going to Asian markets! I’ll have to keep an eye out for wasabi Lays because that is right up my alley. Sadly I don’t think the hubs would be into it. We do have the occasional grocery store date.
Cooking dinner twice sounds like a huge success to me! And no, the painters are not expecting you to provide any food, but they’re glad to have it when you do.
The Lays were excellent – a nice flavor of wasabi, but not a huge amount of heat. My husband didn’t love them, but he’s not a wasabi fan.
You don’t owe the workers any meals. Giving them treats here and there is just lovely and I’m sure they enjoy and appreciate them. It is weird cooking with workers in the house, I get it.
I’m the worst at planning meals, as you read in my post last week. I’d like to say I’m working on it, but that would be a lie. 😳
I do the exact same thing you wrote about, where I lament having to make food every! single! night!, and then look back at the past week and realize it’s been nothing but takeout and leftovers. Even if not a lick of cooking is happening, there’s still the mental stress of thinking about it!
Absolutely I don’t think they are expecting to be fed, although I DO emphathize with how it feels awkward to be preparing a whole meal for your family without offering some. However, I think standard courtesy extends to offering water, coffee, and access to your restroom if needed, and that’s about it. (I did make a VERY over-the-top sandwich with three kinds of lunch meat for a plumber who was able to hydro-jet our sewer pipes on Good Friday, thus avoiding us needing to have our front yard dug up over Easter weekend, but that was partially because he finished the job exactly at lunch time and because we were so elated about saving several thousand dollars — he ended up coming back a month ago to jet it again and I didn’t feed him anything and didn’t feel one bit guilty about it.)
I stick to my meal plan 95% of the time, but that’s largely because I build leftovers, frozen meals, and takeout INTO my plan. I actually cook from scratch about 3 nights per week (with enough leftovers to use for lunches + a dedicated leftover night), and woe unto me if I deviate from the plan, because I post the scheduled meals on a whiteboard and my kids will hold me to it.
Ha – it sounds like your plumber really deserved a special treat!
I fret about not offering coffee, but I don’t drink it and therefore don’t know how to make it! (I made it once for my MIL, following the directions on the package, and she very tactfully drank it… but it was awful, apparently. She has never asked me to make her coffee since.)
Building leftovers and takeout into your plan is very smart. We so rarely have “real” leftovers — I usually end up eating what’s left for my lunches.
But I am deeply uncomfortable with strangers in my space. This I understand down to my core. They can be the nicest people on earth, but they’re not your people so it is weird. Hang in there, the end is in sight.
That’s exactly right: they’re not my people. Thanks, Ally.
Strangers in my space also make me feel uncomfortable.
I’d also feel obligated to provide snacks.
Are we related?? 🤣🤣
We must be! What is this feeling of snack obligation?! It is a very irresistible urge.
We also build leftovers and take-out into meal plans, so usually plan 4 or 5 meals a week. I shop for ingredients on the weekend to make planned meals for the ones I’m responsible for (and I would say most of the time, those meals happen, mostly because I’m very flexible about WHEN they happen). Sometimes I change my mind and make something different with ingredients, like I was going to make steak tacos tonight, but I don’t feel like it, so I’m going to make stir-dry instead. My husband likes to go out and get ingredients for whatever he’s going to cook that day, which I think is the worst possible scenario, but it works for him.
I had every manner of construction person in my house for about three months straight due to a massive renovation and I’m pretty sure they don’t expect anything other than water. Our contractor offered to have a porta-potty, which I guess is pretty standard, but we told them to use our mudroom bathroom instead. There were 3-4 times over the three months that I offered to get them all breakfast or lunch from the deli, and I would say half took me up on it, but everyone appreciated the offer. It’s totally awkward to share your space with even lovely strangers, but I’ve found they mostly just want you to leave them to it, except for a friendly greeting at arrival and a friendly goodbye at departure.
This is so helpful to know about your renovation! We at some point plan to renovate our primary bathroom, so I will be glad to have your experience for reference!
We are team 100% on meal planning because there are no other options. LOL.
I have a friend whose kitchen is getting redone and it turned into a cascade of all other things getting redone (plumbing, floors, etc.) and there were some guys at her house for weeks on end and I guess she told them “I’m going to miss you guys” on their last day. Ha ha ha!
Oh wow, bless her heart! That is so kind. I am going to be so relieved when these guys are gone! (And they are so nice, and as unobtrusive/inoffensive as two strangers doing work in one’s house can possibly be.)
I have bought beer for workers on a Friday evening occasionally. I knew which kind to buy because they had left bottles all over the outside worksite the week before 😉 they did clean up in the end and seemed to appreciate it! Also, I offered coffee/water in the mornings and some muffins if I had baked some. But it never would have occurred to me to offer a full meal, and I am pretty sure (judging from the wrappers left at the site), that they would not have wanted to eat what I would have cooked anyway! Think of the effort of worrying about all of their tastes and potential allergies, and forget about full meals! What you have done is more than generous.
There was one serviceperson who was here ALL DAY and was clearly struggling and frustrated, so I offered him some beer. He turned me down though.
I don’t like having people in my house (or even outside) while I’m home eating lunch or whatever. It’s just very uncomfortable; which I think is common.
You are very generous to give them snacks/lunch, etc. I don’t think they expect it and probably appreciate it very much.
I would not go on a food shopping/preparation date with my husband because 1) we would be in the store FOREVER and 2) he would not want me to assist in preparing any food anway. 😉
Heehee – I like that he takes control in the kitchen! And yes, people outside is nearly as bad as people in the house.
When we had building work done I felt SO WEIRD being in my kitchen. I made the builders bacon sandwiches on Fridays but honestly I wish I hadn’t gone through the effort. They seemed happy with their own food and I paid them enough for the work they did. But I totally understand not wanting to cook when trades people are in your home – Its just really awkward.
We do meal planning and I think we make 70% of what we plan? My husband often makes really big quantities of food which means we have leftovers so I skip a meal I had planned – for instance, tonight was supposed to be slow cooker chili but he made so much stew yesterday that we are having Wednesday’s dinner tonight and then repeating stew tomorrow.
I think making the plan is the bit that makes me feel in control, even if I don’t stick with it.
YES. 100%, making the plan is the bit that makes me feel in control. You have hit the nail right on the head.
I would not provide them any food honestly! It is a kind thing to do but not at all necessary in my opinion! I am glad they will be out of your space soon. It’s tough to have people in your home. Luckily we were able to get our house painted in the summer of 2020 when we were at my parents lake home. Paul was 2.5 then so I envisioned him touching wet walls and making a mess… Gah.
We make and eat about 100% of our meals because I only make 3 meals/week! Our kids eat different meals so those 3 meals only need to feed Phil and I. If we don’t make something that week, it just gets pushed a bit. Like last week I thought we would grill earlier in the week but then we had enough leftovers to eat so we had the grilled meal on Sunday. This week our meal plan consists of take & bake pizza from Papa Murphy’s, a lentil and chicken sausage soup, and fish tacos. The fish tacos are the last thing I will make and I don’t defrost the fish until I am sure we will eat that dish the next day. We only grocery shop once/week so we kind of live and die by our meal plan! And we kind of have a “just in time” inventory system so that’s another reason we have to eat what we plan.
I also (try to) grocery shop only once a week, and it definitely helps to not want some vegetable to go bad.
I appreciate this post because I always wondered if I was the only weirdo who absolutely hated having workers in my house. I feel so judged on everything I’m doing or not doing. I agree you are being more than kind.
I used to totally suck at meal planning (ADD brain) – either I wouldn’t do it or would plan way too much and have stuff go bad. Now I plan one or two things and it works really well. Executive function is always a factor, though. When the kids are home it’s not too hard to slip back into the cooking meat regularly (especially for Angus the twice-a-day-worker-outer), although I do have a tendency to cook at weird times and just stock the fridge for self-feeding because all our schedules are often very different.
Definitely not the only weirdo. I also feel judged on everything I’m doing or not doing. When probably they don’t even notice or care! But I still feel extremely self conscious.
I think the only time I have ever fed anyone who did work in my house is when it was my Father in Law helping my husband install a kitchen faucet. HA! If you’ve been doing it for awhile now, though, you might want to warn them ahead of time so they know to plan for the next day. It would suck if they were all hungry and trying to get the work done.
I used to plan my meals very carefully, but nowadays I’m more go with the flow. I cook 4 days a week (tonight is taco salad), we get take out (or sometimes go out) one night, and my husband cooks on weekends. It works for us!
Ugh, it’s so awkward to have people in your house and while I don’t think you’re expected to provide any food or drinks, not even water, I always feel the urge “offer” something.
I meal plan and 100% of what we plan/buy will be eaten. Occasionally we have to pivot for a meal, but it rarely happens these days. I pretty much stick to my plan 🙂