gift giving

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Gift Ideas for a Nearly Ten-Year-Old

Next to thinking about the cake, my favorite part of birthday prep is planning the presents. Carla had a few things she specifically requested, and there are a handful of things that I think would make for fun surprises. And even though she will not get ALL of the things below (she is spoiled, but not THAT spoiled), maybe they will spark ideas for the ten-year-old in your life?

Video Bird Feeder: I have seen a few of these pop up on Instagram in the past couple of months, but I didn’t seriously consider getting one for Carla until I read about it on Lindsay’s blog (and then on Suz’s blog). Carla would LOVE THIS. She adores birds, is constantly asking if she can have my phone so she can identify birdsong wherever we are, is often up past her bedtime trying to identify birds in our yard, and happily points out and names birds when we are on walks. The last time we went to the library, this was one of the books she checked out. The only disadvantage I can see to getting her a video bird feeder is that she might never do anything else but look at birds. The only other disadvantage is the price, but I’m betting this would pay for itself in hours of enjoyment. Definitely a strong contender. 

Barbie Dream Camper: Carla requested this camper specifically, and has in fact been asking for it for at least two years of birthdays and Christmasses… so she is finally getting it this year. What we do not need is another Barbie accessory with ten thousand tiny parts, but… well, I can remember the Barbie years of my youth, and how much I coveted everything Barbie. And the years of wanting toys are starting to feel extremely limited. So Barbie camper it is. 

Loki: A Bad God’s Guide to Taking the Blame: Carla picked up the first book in this series on a recent Costco trip and loved it. Getting her the next book was a no-brainer. Her aunt and uncle are getting her the third book.

Katie the Catsitter: Secrets and Sidekicks: Speaking of book series, Carla has also enjoyed the Katie the Catsitter books. We’re planning to get her the third in the series.  

Little Live Pets Pippy Pearl: Another toy on Carla’s list was this animatronic fish. She has an enduring fascination with robot animals, and has wanted this fish for years… well, we are finally making her fishy wishes come true. I expect her to remain interested in this thing for the five minutes it takes to release it into the water. 

Raptor Claws: Apparently one of Carla’s classmates has these raptor claws, and Carla wants them badly. She is still quite obsessed with dinosaurs. 

SmART: Use Your Eyes to Boost Your Brain: I read about this book on Instagram and I think Carla would really enjoy it.

Giggleway Robotic Kit: I don’t know how many robot kits my daughter needs, but she really likes putting them together. I got this kit for her cousin recently and Carla expressed significant envy, so perhaps she’ll get her own. 

Cowgirl Boots: Carla loves to wear boots, but we’ve had some bad luck with boots falling apart, zippers failing, detailing falling off. These boots have NONE of that nonsense, and I know she would wear them all the time. 

Pusheen Stuffie: I don’t know where she came up with this, but she has been asking for “a giant Pusheen.” I think by giant she means… Carla Sized. Well, this is much smaller than that, but it’s very cute. Her uncle called dibs on getting it for her, so I’m guessing it’s a sure thing. 

Whittling Kit: Carla has been… whittling. She is a child of many vast and varying interests. Might be nice to get her a kit (with knife resistant gloves, omg) rather than finding her whittling away with an exact-o knife. *Deep breaths.* One of her grandparents is bound to get this for her.

Sensory Swing: I am on the fence with this one (I have a deathly fear of hammocks, and this looks suspiciously close to a rebranded hammock), but it looks so cozy and I bet Carla would really enjoy it. If not a birthday gift, maybe something to consider for the new house.

ATM Piggy Bank: Carla has a terrible habit of stowing her allowance any old place – on the bookcase, in her desk, in a drawer – and I’m hoping the novelty of this piggy bank will cure her of that. 

Air Hogs Gravitator: This is sort of a drone, but not really. I think I would be much too annoyed by it, so I’m leaning away from getting it for her. But then again, Carla would really get a kick out of it. I imagine lots of ten-year-olds – especially those with much cooler moms than me – would love it.

Gridopolis: This 3-D game of strategy gets great reviews… and I always love a good family game. 

Sleuth & Solve Science Mysteries: This book is seemingly the perfect intersection of Carla’s love of science and her love of Encyclopedia Brown books.

Harry Potter Coding Kit: Carla has gotten a couple of coding kits in the past, and seems to really enjoy them… but then lose interest. But she did really well in her computational thinking class at school this year, and maybe this would reinforce that interest? Also, it has a wand!

Rainbow Throw Blanket: This blanket is so cute and I can already envision Carla wrapping around herself like a toga.

Wolf Fiction: Carla is currently fascinated with wolves, which has seeped over into her reading life. She adored A Wolf Called Wander, WolfWalkers, and the first two books of the Wolves of the Beyond books (we cannot find book three anywhere, including in our library system, and I cannot bring myself to skip it and get her book four, which may be ridiculous but there it is). But what next? Maybe The Wolf Wilder? Or A Wolf for a Spell?

Squishmallow Minis: When we were discussing the many, many iterations of her friend birthday, one of the potential party favors was going to be this set of mini squishmallow farm animals. While we moved on from farm animals (to succulents; we’re doing succulents), Carla was extremely SQUEEEEEE! about these little guys. I know she’d love to unwrap them and snuggle them and assign them ridiculous names and personalities. 

Reading Journal: While my husband is gently pushing back on my desire to get Carla a reading journal, I kind of think she would love it? She likes journals. She likes reading. She’s supposed to be doing lots of reading over the summer. This seems like it would be practical (you know I love a practical gift) AND fun. I mean, sure, fun for a very particular sort of ten-year-old. But they exist!

Joke Writing Book: Yes, I realize that this is kind of a book-heavy list. But books are the best gifts, I think we ALL agree. (Right?) Carla loves to tell a good joke, and she’s been experimenting with coming up with her own jokes a lot these past few months. I bet she’d love a book about how to craft really good jokes.

Create Your Own Secret Language: Carla and one of her school friends made up their own secret language this year. Would it sap all the fun out of it to give her a how-to manual? I could get a copy for her friend, too, whose birthday is also coming up… Hmmm…

Villainous Board Game: Carla loves a good villain, and this board game looks really fun. 

Jumpsuit: One of Carla’s FAVORITE outfits is a black jumpsuit. She wears it all the time, but it’s getting to be quite small. Plus, she’s moved on from All Black All the Time, and has informed me that her new favorite color is turquoise. The child model does not look enthused about this jumpsuit (I would not be enthused either; HOW DO YOU PEE), but I think Carla would be wildly enthused about it.

Finders Seekers Mystery Game: Carla and her father and I love playing solve-the-mystery games together. This one looks both fun and educational, and there’s potential for a monthly subscription if it’s a big hit.

If you have a ten-year-old in your life, what’s a toy/game/book they really love… or a gift you’ve given that’s been particularly well-received? 

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Gifts for a Child You Don’t Know That Well

I am in the market for a gift for a child that I don’t know all that well.

That sounds… odd. So let’s come up with some background details about my particular relationship to this semi-known child.

Let’s say I want to find a gift for the child of someone I sing with in the church choir. So… I know the parent, and I know him in the way that you know someone you see every week for years on end. For instance, I know his spouse’s name and maybe I’ve even stopped to chat if we see each other in Target. I know his kids’ names and I made a plate of cookies for him when his father died last year. His spouse helped volunteer for the donation drive I managed a couple of years ago. Maybe he and I have been in a group text about who’s bringing bagels on a given week. So we know each other, but we don’t know each other well. Similarly, I know his child in the way that you know a child who occasionally sits in the front pew every week during choir practice, and who sometimes reads a Bible verse when the Sunday School comes in for the children’s sermon, and who runs around shrieking with your own child during church potlucks. I know the child well enough to say hello, and to ask how school is, but I don’t necessarily know what the child’s favorite colors are or what they are into these days or whether they own all the Pokémon figures or if they only wear pink. 

This scenario is completely made up, but I hope it helps paint the picture of the relationship in a clear-enough way.

Anyway. This child has been in an accident; it has been extremely stressful and worrisome for the entire family and of course the poor child. The parents have been at the hospital; there have been churchwide efforts to help with childcare. The parent I know emailed the entire choir with an update, so we all have a few very limited details like the child has survived the accident and will be in the hospital for a short time and then will come home and be in a neck brace. It sounds like the recovery will be lengthy, and that the child will be stuck in bed for awhile, but the duration is unknown.

The idea that a child so close to Carla’s age could endure something so awful – well, I’m sure you know what that proximity to near-death feels like, and all the complex emotions it raises. 

My brain has chosen to channel this proximal fear and horror into a compulsion to buy something for this child. It literally feels like the least I can do. But maybe also it would be useful, to help the child get through what promises to be a painful recovery. And maybe it would indicate, to child and parents, just how loved this child is – by people even at the fringes of their circles. Knowing that someone cares about your child offers a kind of comfort. 

I am going into the gift buying process without ANY KNOWLEDGE of what the kid likes or doesn’t like or already has. This kid is a second-grade girl who has older siblings, if that helps in any way. My own child was a second-grade girl in the recent past, so you would think that would help but it does not. You might also assume that many years of buying birthday presents for my child’s classmates might help me here, but again, no.

(Please note that I am not going to text the child’s parent for more information. It is too stressful a time for them. Nor has any one of our mutual friends stepped forward as The Point of Contact, so there’s no one else I can ask. I have brainstormed with a couple of other people in the choir, but we are all kind of at a loss.)

In some ways, I think that it doesn’t matter what the gift is, because hopefully the novelty will help. But in other ways, I would like it to be a good gift. Something that helps make the time pass. Something that isn’t too painful to use/operate. Something that provides a welcome respite from what will surely be a LOT of screen time. 

One thing I’m considering is a lap desk. Maybe something like this, that has a spot for a glass (or pencils) and some cubbies for crayons or coloring books. 

Or this one has a little compartment in which you can store papers and pencils, plus it has a little slot in which you can stow an iPad. It is awfully small, though. 

I think I would also want to buy some easy-to-use toys. Like Wikki-stix, maybe? Those were an enduring favorite of Carla’s, maybe even into second grade. And I think they could be used even if head/neck mobility is limited. Pop-Tubesare fun, too. Or Monkey Noodles. 

Play-Doh came to mind as something that could be operated easily… but then I started thinking about how messy and crumbly Play-Doh can be. Monkey Foam might be a good alternative. Still moldable, but won’t dry out or crumble or smear into the carpet/bedding (I hope). 

Paint by stickers books are another enduring favorite of Carla’s. Maybe they would be soothing/diverting for someone in bed for endless hours?

Speaking of stickers: I was thinking about how, when you break a limb, your classmates can sign your cast. I think it makes it interactive for the kids, plus it also helps make it less scary for everyone and less of an embarrassing “thing” for the kid wearing the cast. I wonder if there’s something similar for a neck brace? A friend suggested the kinds of stickers you put on water bottles. Without knowing at all what the brace will be made of, I wonder if that would work?

Magnetic Tic-Tac-Toe might be fun, especially for the siblings to play together.

Or maybe these tangram puzzles – also magnetic – would be a fun challenge?

I wonder if this particular child would enjoy coloring? This pillowcase looks fun – and it seems kind of gleefully wrong to use markers on the bedding!

While I’m a little suspicious of how well this will work, I think the idea is so cool: a projector that shows images of dinosaurs, planets, or stars on the ceiling or walls. 

A book of games and puzzles would definitely be useful. Maybe along with some cute pencils that never need sharpening.

Stuffed animals seem to be a hit even with the ten-year-old set, and I love this little tree full of stuffed friends.

Are there other options I’m missing? What would you get for a bed-bound child about whom you knew very few details? 

And would you get the child’s siblings anything? (And if so, what?) I keep thinking, this has been traumatic for them, too! Maybe they would also appreciate a little giftie. 

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Five for Friday

First things first: I love you. You are so kind and generous of heart and so supportive. When I post things like I did yesterday, I immediately feel like I should delete the post. It makes me feel so self-pitying and like I’m fishing for optimism and super vulnerable. Thank you for reading and being so lovely.

DRASTIC TONE AND SUBJECT CHANGE

I took one day off from posting about holiday stuff and now I’m BACK with holiday topics! 

1. I have been taking all your advice about gifting. Gigi said I should buy the gift for my friend; Jenny said that she has never regretted the gifts she bought but has sometimes regretted not getting a gift – so I went back to the store and bought the T-shirt that made me think of her. And I included a little note that basically said, I know things are awful, I’m sorry for my part in it, and I will be here if and when you are ready. Ugh ugh ugh. I mailed it, so it’s on its way to her and there’s nothing any of us can do at this point, but I hope it doesn’t make things worse. SKIPPING PAST THIS PAINFUL PART. I also used Jenny’s comment as an excuse to buy my husband a pair of pajama pants. He’d asked for some, and I’d dutifully sent the request along to his family, so it’s possible he will get pajama pants from them as well. But a person cannot have too many pairs of pajama pants. I also bought Starbucks gift cards for three of Carla’s extra-curricular instructors per Swistle’s suggestion and, in a nod to Lindsay’s comment, Carla made a mug for the fourth. We got the housekeeper some fancy candy, in addition to an extra payment. The exterminator is coming next week (silverfish and spiders have decided to spend their holidays with us and I have decided that I don’t like that), so I will do candy and some cash for him. (I adore him, and ever since the last debacle with the pest control company, have dealt only with him which has made life better for everyone, except, perhaps, the exterminator himself.) My husband and I agreed to buy the alarm clock for Carla. I didn’t even have to sway him with all your pro-alarm-clocks-as-gifts statements, although I had them all in my back pocket. In deference to Carla’s preference for wearing All Black Only Black All the Time, we also purchased a pair of faux leather leggings that I think she is going to LOVE. I couldn’t get my husband to agree on any of the perfectly adorable tops I wanted to get her, but I did end up buying her two plain black long-sleeved tees from Primary. 

image from amazon.com

2. The menorah is up! Past Me cleaned it quite thoroughly last year, so all I had to do was set it up. We also have plenty of candles (yay! This is never true!) and even some gelt that I hope is from this year and not several years old. Please forgive the fact that the menorah is set up on my Christmas runner. We celebrate Hanukkah and Christmas, so there is naturally some mixing. However, when I asked my husband whether we could put Carla’s Hanukkah gift under the tree, he was quite definitive. 

I also bought some frozen latkes from Trader Joe’s, so we are all set… not that I have any idea what ELSE we will eat for any night of Hanukkah except the night that coincides with Christmas. 

3. I have already done A Lot of wrapping. It feels… good, I guess? Except that I am awaiting all the gifts from family that may or may not require wrapping. Now that I know how expensive shipping is (SO EXPENSIVE), I am trying to view my relatives’ decision to have Amazon, Target, etc. mail their gifts for them, even if they do arrive unwrapped, with more grace. In the past, I have viewed it crankily as a lack of pre-planning… but it may also be a cost-cutting measure, which I completely understand. (I also understand procrastinating, but… it still makes me a tiny bit cranky.) What I did the other day was wrap all the stocking stuffers. I may have gone a teensy bit overboard in the stocking stuffer department. But stocking stuffers are just so fun! I don’t remember if stocking stuffers were wrapped when I was a kid, but my husband’s family wraps them, so we wrap them as well.

My husband’s family also has stocking stuffers come from entities other than Santa, which is cute but a little perplexing. Plus, it means that every stocking stuffer needs a gift tag. I am SURE we didn’t do that when I was growing up; it was just understood that Santa filled the stocking. Plus… how do you determine who signs for which gifts? For example: my husband got Carla a set of guitar picks decorated with cats. (She will LOVE them.) He said they should be from Santa’s elves… and then changed his mind to Santa’s cat. A) I already “disguise” my handwriting on the gift tags that say they are from Santa, but I really have only so many ways to change my writing style. B) Why does Santa’s cat deliver guitar picks and Mrs. Claus deliver a new ornament? C) How does Rudolph even WRITE a gift tag? He has hooves, not even paws with which he might plausibly hold a pen? 

4. My husband bought me some English toffee from Trader Joe’s as a gift. But then I accidentally saw it and so he gave it me early. He said he’d heard me say, in passing, that toffee is my weakness. This is, sadly, true. And I have eaten my way through more than half of this quite husky container. 

5. The number of holiday cards we are getting is slowly creeping up. We are at fifteen today, which is better than a few days ago but still nowhere near the level I would expect. Oh well. I just sent out some more cards yesterday, and I have three more to address and mail, so who am I to question the lack of cards? Maybe everyone’s a little behind. 

What’s new with you this Friday?