I love flowers as much as the next person. Despite facing various and sundry obstacles, including but not limited to disrespectful rabbits, a black thumb, and a flower-hungry herd of suburban deer, I planted flowers in containers for my front porch and back yard.
Part of this is flower envy. Many of my neighbors have beautiful yards, full of gorgeous flowers. One neighbor planted a border around all their shrubbery of alternating yellow and orange marigolds, and it is so cheery and I ogle it every time I’m out on a walk.
But I have noticed that some people take a… different tack when it comes to flowers.
They are going the fake route.
A few years ago, back when I was in a book club, a friend and co-book club member would regale us with stories of her next door neighbor. Among many other quirks, her neighbor was notable for “planting” artificial flowers in her yard each spring.
We thought this was a remarkable and unusual behavior, specific, perhaps, to this one person.
But it is not, Internet. It is NOT.
I first noticed fake flowers at one house on my walking route a few years ago. (They have since moved, or come over to the dark side of fresh floral arrangements.)
But this year, I’ve noticed more and more artificial flora cropping up around the neighborhood.
This house nearby recently built a fence/gate thing for privacy… and filled in the gap with some fake flowers.
I drive around a small traffic circle each day and noticed recently it had been spruced up for Independence Day. With fake red-white-and-blue flowers.
Another house on my route has a wide array of fake flowers in various sections of their yard… but also, some living flowers in their side yard.
Listen, no judgment. Mild amusement, maybe. But you do you, boo.
After all, there’s much to be said for artificial flowers. They are eye-catching. They are probably less expensive than fresh flowers. They take way less time to reach their full potential than growing flowers from seed. They are GUARANTEED to be bright and colorful year-round. They never wilt or require weeding. They are extremely drought tolerant. And deer and rabbits don’t have a taste for them (yet).
If artificial flora makes your heart sing, then by all means, let your fake flower flag fly.
We have one house with fake flowers in our neighborhood, but just one (that I can think of at least). I find it kind of odd, but whatever floats your boat.
I despise each and every one of these images! 🤷♀️ I have every sympathy with trying to make one’s life easier, but these are just downright ugly – yes, we all like different things, but these are dreadful when new and get increasingly worse as they fade in the sun. As for the ecological issues of all that unnecessary plastic…!
A family in our neighbourhood has fake lawn. Like, what used to be called Astro Turf. While I’m sure it’s nice to be low maintenance, it looks bizarre in late winter when snow is melting and they have bright green grass.
All of which is to say…fake flowers, um, no thanks.
I understand your flower envy – I do. My friend down the streets has all kinds of containers filled with annuals. She even plants annuals in her beds every season. And I love it. And I don’t know where she finds the time. Annuals are just too needy for me.
I do not want to deal with annuals – they require too much attention. I will plant a flowering perennial, baby it for the spring and summer, and after that it is on its own (and usually survives somehow).
But fake flowers? Inside is bad enough but outside? It boggles the mind – but you know, it takes all kinds to make the world go ’round. If fake flowers make them happy they can have at it.
Fake flowers in a garden should earn you an immediate trip to the Bad Place, same as having a vanity license plate or attending a Red Hot Chili Peppers concert. (Ala Michael’s list from the Good Place in season 1)
This is so strange. I can’t believe it. My MIL has always had fake indoor plants. That always blew my mind. They were covered in a thick layer of dust. This dates back to when we were first married and I feel like she was just way too young to have fake, dusty plants.
I drive through one of the nicest neighborhoods in probably most of Illinois to get to the ortho. I did that drive on Thursday and I had serious flower bed envy. I struggle to keep the inside of my house together, but GOSH did these flowers make me want to find time to devote to my yard. So pretty. Of course this is a neighborhood where people have a staff or ‘people’ who do this for them, so . . . take that into consideration.