Forced Festivity

With everything (that word is doing a LOT of work) going on these days, and the attendant underlying doom, I am continuing to hyper-focus on making the holidays Extra Special. My husband has cut me off from buying any more presents for Carla (although there are still so many things I could get her! as though overwhelming her with material goods will help at all!), and I’m not really sure which new vessel I can pour my Making Things Special panic into next. The panic and the wheel-spinning have consequently drained a lot of the holiday spirit from my preparations. So I am trying to FORCE myself into feeling appropriately festive. Perhaps if I just jam myself as hard as possible into holiday-ish activities I typically enjoy, I will find the holiday spirit somewhere among them.

Here’s what I’ve been doing so far:

Enjoying Winter: We have gotten, so far, approximately 20 inches of snow. Carla and I spent more than an hour outside the first day, while the snow was still falling – I was trying to remove some of the snow from our poor trees, which were bowed low to the ground with the weight of winter (relatable) and she happily slid down the slide, molded snow penguins, crawled through the snow, ate handfuls of the fresh top layer, and flopped around making snow angels. I also decided to shovel the walkway, thinking of the poor postal workers having to trudge through all that white, but of course my work was covered by a new frosty layer by the time we came inside. Oh well. At least there was less to shovel when next I attempted it. By the time we came in, our hoods were full, our hair was crusted, and our cheeks were rosy.

I find snow festive and cheering, especially when I can play in it with Carla. Heavy snow is her favorite type of weather, and I totally get it. (Although I fear for the health and well-being of our poor trees.) Once the snow stopped, we had glorious sunshine. And brilliant sun transforming the snow into a shawl of diamonds is MY favorite kind of weather.

Seeing Through the Kiddo’s Eyes: This week I got to unveil Carla’s Christmas-anticipation activities. I feel weird calling them Advent Activities, because 1) I had to do a quick Google search just to remember what Advent IS (sorry Mom) and 2) I am not really equipped to teach Carla how to appreciate the season from a religious standpoint. This is not to say that we won’t dabble in some religious education this month; Hanukkah arrives on December 10, so we will be revisiting the Maccabees and the miracle of the oil and honestly it seems like a more poignant message than ever this year. As does the hopeful joy of the Christmas season – so much anticipation and gratitude and delight over the birth of the person who is meant to be our salvation. 

Back to my regularly scheduled secular celebrations: My husband and I got Carla this LEGO Advent Calendar, and she is delighted each morning to open it up and find a new little character/item to build and play with. But I also saw this beautiful reading calendar on Everyday Reading a few weeks ago and immediately uploaded it to the Staples website to be printed and picked it up, curbside. I’m glad I got it early; it gave me a chance to look over the daily reading activities and order some appropriate reading material from the library. (Our home Christmas book collection is a little thin.) Carla has been having a lot of fun coloring the image associated with the day and she has been reading the books out loud to me, which I feel is Educational on top of being festive. 

Easing Into Christmas Décor: We have not yet decorated for Christmas. Although I have put up the wreath my mother sent me; she sends me one each year and it is one of my favorite, favorite, FAVORITE things about the holidays. It smells so fresh and lovely and it looks welcoming and festive (it’s the only outdoor holiday décor we have, so it does a lot of work) and this year it has tiny little lights, on a timer, that make it that much more special and lovely. I may start bringing out the Christmas stuff bit by bit, rather than doing it all at once, although this will all be mood dependent; if I get a big rush of decorating energy, I will certainly not tamp it down.

Holiday-ing Day-to-Day Mundanities: I have finally allowed myself to start using the Twisted Peppermint lotion that makes me feel very Christmassy. (Should I get the matching shower gel? Or try the Gingerbread Latte lotion, which could be fun or disgusting and there’s no way to know?) (Although I have discovered I need to use it sparingly; I applied it two days in a row and found it more cloying on the second day than on the first.) I put out the Christmas hand towels – some in the powder room and two in the kitchen; I need more holiday towels, I think. My husband was, surprisingly, on board with buying Christmas family jammies this year so we have matching sleepwear that is bringing me a lot of glee. (We aren’t even wearing the jammies regularly — we did it once — but just the THOUGHT is enough to make me preemptively happy.)

Making a Holiday Playlist: Just like holiday decorations, I can’t start with Christmas music too early because I get sick of it. But it DOES help foster that festive feeling. So I am compromising by making a playlist of holiday-season/winter songs. (I like a good mix of Christmas carols and wintery bops.) This does require me to listen to a song, to ensure that it qualifies for placement on the list. But I am not listening to seasonal music nonstop. I acknowledge that may not be as real a distinction for you as it is in my brain. So far, my playlist has: “Last Christmas” by Wham, “All I Want for Christmas Is You” by Mariah Carey, “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” by John Legend (a song that is rightly though exhaustingly controversial, but I like the way John’s version sounds and I don’t mind his contemporizing of the lyrics), “White Winter Hymnal” by Fleet Foxes, and five songs from Gwen Stefani’s “You Make It Feel Like Christmas” album. It’s a slow start indeed, and I welcome any and all suggestions. 

Sending Out Holiday Cards: We DID decide to do holiday cards, and took our photo on Thanksgiving when we were already wearing Real Clothes for family zooms… and our cards arrived this week! They definitely look homemade (which they were – I designed them) but I am trying very hard not to care. I keep telling myself VERY LOUDLY INSIDE MY HEAD that no one will care if the borders are slightly different sizes or that the photos are kind of blurry. NO ONE CARES. They just want the card. Plus, the cards will be looked at close-up probably once, when they are opened, and then they will be hung up on a mantel or a wall or a doorway and will be enjoyed from afar. (Exception: If you are able to have your mother over during Card Season, in which case she will remove her glasses and get right up in there and examine each card very carefully and ask if that is the same Wendy you went to high school with and didn’t she have three children instead of two and wasn’t her husband a fire fighter, is he still with the fire department, and have you heard how her sister is doing after her surgery, shoulder surgery wasn’t it? Moms are the best, truly, and I cannot wait to do this very thing to Carla someday.) 

These things are already working a little, so far. And just writing them down has tamped down the holiday anxiety a bit. What are you doing to feel festive?

8 thoughts on “Forced Festivity”

  1. Okay, darling, I loved this post so very much. I love that you enjoy the snow and frolic in it too! I have to tell you – DO NOT GET THE GINGERBREAD LATTE LOTION. Trust me on this one. I have the Frosted Coconut hand soap and I wish I had the whole line (although I’m not sure if it IS available in lotion form, but if it is, I want it all). The card thing cracked me up so much. I can relate so hard and I will do that too. I have a spotify playlist that keeps growing – I am going to suggest Driving Home For Christmas, which is lovely. If you want to sob uncontrollably, which, why would you, White Wine In The Sun and River. I mean, maybe wait until next year to put those on. Also, every version ever made of Santa Baby, Baby It’s Cold Outside, and Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas. My kids are convinced there are only about seven actual Christmas songs, everything is a remake.

  2. All the Christmas crafting is the “festive” for me with my kids right now. We accidentally checked out a Christmas countdown book from the library (“How Winston delivered Christmas”) and it includes a suggested activity each day. I’m also taking the slow approach to decorating, at least for now, trying to spread out the joy that each different Christmas thing brings.

  3. Oh man- big plug from me for getting the decorations up. We had a SOLID day of decorating on Sunday but having Christmas lights and the tree up now makes me realize how much I truly needed those twinkling lights- I can hardly bear to turn them off during the day!

  4. I’m hoping to get the tree up tomorrow and decorating it eventually.

    We are still without hot water (TEN DAYS tomorrow), so I’m not feeling particularly festive at the moment – more of an intense rage.

    We will send out cards this year – I have requested that we all take selfies and send our favorites to me to make a collage to have printed. We’ll see how it goes. At this point, between the hot water issue and the pandemic – I honestly don’t care about any of it.

  5. Oh, gosh, Gigi, I’m sorry!

    We decorated the Sunday after Thanksgiving and I’m so glad. I hope you find the decorating mojo but I surely understand NOT having it yet. Our Advent calendar is doing its job, I guess, although I have one of those annoying ones that’s pretty, but I have to fill it myself, so at first it stressed me out. I think I have 2 days later in the month with nothing in them, but I have extra candy (and that’s what my big kids want, anyway… or at least I hope it is.)

    I am IMPRESSED with Carla reading the Christmas books to you, and with your religious-education efforts. (One of the things I have in the Advent calendar is a tiny little Nativity set, so I hope that counts.)

    I love Twisted Peppermint. I also have BBW hand soaps in the kitchen and the hall bath, and lots of Christmas kitchen towels. And the thing I did yesterday that makes it feel like The Holidays is I made gumbo with the leftover turkey carcass, which I had frozen after Tgiving. It’s one of my family’s traditions and smelled so good all day, and today I get cozy leftovers for lunch.

  6. We are very envious of your snow! My kids love lots of snow, and the first winter we were here (2013) was FANTASTIC, and, apparently, unusual because no winter has been that snowy since. We got 2-3″ recently, but it has melted already, and I find it hard to feel festive without a beautiful layer of white.

    Good for you for getting Christmas cards done!!

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