being a home owner is terrible

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Weekend Breakdown

How was your weekend, Internet?

Here in the USofA, it was a holiday weekend. From a Companionship and Connection standpoint, it was a standout weekend. I am trying so very hard to hold onto the warm fuzzies I have from spending time with dear friends and beloved family members, but I will be honest: I am cranky.

Content Note: What follows is some whining from a highly privileged and wildly fortunate individual who really has nothing to complain about. I don’t blame you if you don’t have time for that, so I’ll see you on the flippity flop.

My husband got Friday off, which meant that instead of going into the office and seeing patients, he went upstairs to his home office and dealt with insurance companies and pathology reports and patient calls from home. Sure, he got to sleep in and wear shorts and a T-shirt and he didn’t have to commute. Still… That’s not really a day off.

Also, the WEATHER, my god. The weather has been my absolute least favorite, unless you count “active tornado” which is worse. It has been SO HOT and SO HUMID and I HATE IT.

Friday afternoon was miserable.

Thank goodness we have a brand new air conditioner and a pool!

Except that last week, my daughter’s room was hovering around 80F (26C) at night. The HVAC guy had warned me, after the installation, that our AC had been off for a full day, so the second floor of the house would take a couple of days to get back to temperature. But… 80 degrees after four days of waiting seemed reasonable enough. Also, we had two VIPs arriving that afternoon, and a third later that evening, and I did not want them to be sweaty and uncomfortable.  

Fortunately, the HVAC guy was working on Friday and came right over and very enthusiastically tested the velocity of our air output from each register and measured the temperature of the air coming out and checked all the connections and did a bunch of other things and by the end of his visit, things were cooling down.

AC accounted for, I went out to clean the pool. (Well, I didn’t clean it, I let the pool guy do it.) The previous owners thoughtfully installed an automatic pool cover, which has been wonderful. The pool stays fairly clean, the water doesn’t evaporate as much, we have fewer critters leaping to their deaths in the water. But it would not open. And it was SO HOT. Together with my husband, we coaxed it into opening about halfway, but then it refused to move any further. Listen, I know the VIPs would have been gracious about not being able to swim, I know this. And yet. Plus, my daughter was having a friend over and I much prefer having lots of outdoor options for kids to relying on a cooling-but-still-too-hot room and a bunch of tempting screens.

Fortunately, the pool service person was working Friday! He sent out his best guy, who managed to open the pool cover. But, he noted, it will not close. We’ll have to get a pool cover specialist to come address it. Can’t wait.

Saturday morning, my daughter notified us that there was something wrong with her ceiling. We trooped into her room (cooler, thank goodness) for a look. Hmm. A suspiciously leak-like circle surrounded a tiny crack in the plaster.

Yesterday, my husband was unloading the dishwasher while I was trying to write. He opened a cupboard to put something away, and the glass lid of a casserole dish leapt out at him and shattered into smithereens on the kitchen floor. It hit the counter on the way down, leaving plenty of smithereens all over that, as well. Thank goodness it didn’t land on his foot. But the poor guy had large hunks of glass ON his bare feet and said he wasn’t sure how or where to move.

Fortunately, after a three-stage cleanup, we got the glass taken care of with minimal bleeding.

Then I got my period for the second time in about twelve years (I take oral contraceptive pills to prevent that; it should not be happening.)

Then I got a notification from Costco that my contact lens order hadn’t gone through because my prescription was outdated.

Then my daughter notified us that her ceiling looked worse.

Then I discovered my cat had knocked a section of staples off my desk and batted them across the room. I don’t think he ate any of them – he doesn’t really EAT things, except food and plants – but I don’t know that he didn’t eat any of them. All the online resources I consulted said a) this is an emergency, call the vet immediately or b) this is not an emergency unless he shows XYZ symptoms, watch him carefully or c) give him food right away to help get the foreign object through his system or d) absolutely do NOT give him food because it could cause or worsen a blockage.

“I would never eat a staple.”

Of course I had nightmares all night, mainly about being pregnant and the baby not doing well. This morning, I noticed that the house felt warmer than it should be, and when I call for cooler temperatures, it doesn’t do anything right away (at all?). The ceiling crack is holding steady, but we are expecting more thunderstorms and more rain.

Today, of course, I have been making all the calls (and you know I love phone calls) (no): To my eye doctor, to update my prescription. To Costco, whose online platform allows me to cancel my previous order, but does not allow me to update or change my prescription. To the pool cover people. To the roofing contractor who is handling our as-yet-not-started roof replacement. Do I call the vet (the cat is behaving totally normally, including eating and producing waste as usual)? Do I call my primary about the spotting? Do I call the HVAC guy?

Yes, I acknowledge that I am very lucky that THESE are my biggest problems. I am grateful to have experts to call (if they would only call me back) and grateful to have the resources to address the issues.

I AM STILL CRANKY.

Okay, deep breaths. Let’s combat the crankiness with some reflection on the absolutely wonderful parts of the weekend.

  • My time with the VIPs was fabulous. It is so rare for me to find people I like and like spending time with, if that makes sense? Even with people whose company I really enjoy, I often end up feeling depleted of energy at the end of our time together, which is not a reflection on them, that’s just my introverted personality. But the VIPs were the opposite. They charged my social battery instead of draining it, and I was sad to say goodnight at the end of our time together, and I hope to see them again sometime soon.
  • Saturday was a quintessentially perfect summer day. My whole family slept in (with a brief wake-up for me at 5:30ish to feed and play with the cat, who slept in until 6:00!) and then spent the afternoon in the pool. It was hot enough that the pool felt wonderful and breezy enough that the heat was tolerable.
  • Fourth of July was pretty great. My family typically spends July Fourth in the basement, feeling crotchety toward our neighbors who set off fireworks. To be clear, this is our preferred way to observe Independence Day. But I asked a friend what she was doing for the holiday and she told me, and then asked what I was doing, and when I said nothing she either took pity on me or thought I was angling for an invitation to her event, because she invited my family to join hers. We had such a nice time! She is my friend for a reason, and she and her family are lovely and welcoming and it was actually kind of nice to celebrate the holiday instead of boycott it. The day’s promised thunderstorms never materialized, and the weather was less humid than it had been. The evening ended with a fireworks show that was the perfect amount of spectacular and the perfect length. I had forgotten the special kind of buoyant unity that fireworks can inspire. And by the time we got home, our neighbors had nearly finished their own fireworks show, so we only had to endure a few pops and booms.
  • The extreme heat may be ebbing. Not only is today supposed to hover around 77F (25C), but the weather forecast suggests that we are taking a turn toward the high 70s/mid 80s (24/30C), which sounds a hell of a lot more pleasant than last week.
  • My cat continues to be The Best Cat.
Here he is, glaring at me because I am Outside and he is Inside. He disagrees with my assessment that his triple-layer coat is incompatible with our current temperatures.

Okay, as per usual, being grateful has shifted my mood toward the positive. Thank you for reading. If you have any complaints, big or small, I am happy to listen!  

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Wordy Wednesday Wandering

June was a whirlwind, wasn’t it? I am still trying to wrap my mind around how it can possibly be July already. The past few days alone included: picking up my child from sleepaway camp, observing a belated Father’s Day with my husband, buying a new car, getting a new air conditioner installed, and celebrating my daughter’s birthday. For those of you who have been around since I was on the fence about having kids: THE KID IS NOW THIRTEEN.

I could only find the “birthday” portion of the “happy birthday” banner, which I think it more of an indication of my current level of discombobulation than lack of delight at my kiddo becoming a teenager.

I have been doing SO MUCH laundry, and there is stuff (camp stuff, gift detritus, air conditioner replacement debris) everywhere, and I cannot stay on top of the mess.

This looks much neater and tidier than it FEELS. It FEELS like being slowly suffocated on all sides by Stuff.

(Alert, alert: Lisa and Nicole, you may want to skip the next two paragraphs and the photo between them.)

The air conditioner replacement was a fun surprise. I scheduled a simple clean-and-check with my HVAC company, and the technician discovered that all the wiring had been devastated by mice. In fact, the only thing that was preventing the wires from being exposed completely was a giant mouse nest. I think you know how I feel about this, which is burn it all down.

How can something so small and kind of cute be so destructive?!?!

We’d already spent a pretty penny to deal with previous mouse-related air conditioning carnage, back in April of 2024, and it was one of those deals where we could shell out a bunch of money to repair the old unit, which could of course die at any moment and has already proved much too welcoming to rodents… or shell out more money for a new, slightly-more-mouse-resistant unit. Considering this week is in the 90s (30s C), we went with the latter option.

The air conditioner is not doing a whole lot for the top floor yet. Carla slept with her camp fan clipped to her bedframe last night. It really does a great job of cooling. (We got it for camp because it is one of the few options that requires only batteries, and not some sort of USB charger to keep it powered on.) Several of the stores we’ve been to recently have been selling fans, which makes me feel like I need more fans. But Carla and I plan to spend as much time in or near the pool as possible, as a heat-beating measure. She has a new turtle pool float and I have pool hammocks to lounge in and copious amounts of sunscreen.

REAL FEEL ONE-OH-FIVE. No thank you.

I have been exploring all the delicious options for hot-weather meals that involve no cooking whatsoever; we had chickpea salad sandwiches last night, on homemade sourdough bread that my husband’s colleague sent home with him. I am planning on making a cold noodle salad later this week, or a Mediterranean platter, or possibly another round of sandwiches, this time with this version of chickpea salad.

Interrupting my husband’s day seeing patients with really crucial discussions.

Carla and I spent the afternoon of her birthday shopping, which was delightful and exhausting. She wanted to go into every tchotchke / novelty items boutique within a ten mile radius. Our adventure included Five Below, Home Goods, Michaels, Hobby Lobby, Target, and the Dollar Store. We also went to Pet Smart, to look at the kitties.

During our expedition, we passed a new international foods store and had to check it out. They had a variety of snacks and treats from different countries. I snagged a bag of coriander flavored Doritos which are my new favorite thing. They taste just like cilantro and are SO GOOD.

Yummmmmm.

Carla was more interested to learn that this store sold squishies and fidgets that are currently all the rage. She persuaded her father to buy her a NeeDoh Fuzz Ball, but then when we got home, she noticed that it doesn’t have the NeeDoh logo on it. We got squishy scammed, y’all. My thought is that this store had no idea they were selling counterfeit NeeDohs, and so I am hoping we can go back and inform them about the problem, maybe get our money back, and definitely get some more coriander chips.  

If you live in the U.S., are you celebrating Independence Day? I dislike this holiday because of the fireworks. They are loud and dangerous and it seems like a lot of people take the expansive view that the entire month of July is for setting off firecrackers in their yards at all hours of the day and night. I get very Grumpy Old Lady about the whole thing, and my husband and I typically prefer to spend the holiday holed up in our basement, grumbling about our neighbors (him) and fretting that a rogue firework will set our home ablaze (me). (Last year, we woke up on July 5 to find our driveway littered with spent firework shells.)

Art by Sina Simburger, @sin.xline

My in laws sent my whole family holiday apparel. This was a very kind gesture, and 250 years is a momentous anniversary. For all its flaws, I love my country. We have freedoms and opportunities here that I try not to take for granted. It is exciting and remarkable that we have reached this semiquincentennial milestone. And… I kind of feel that expressing any kind of patriotism gives an inaccurate impression of my beliefs and politics. I’ve driven past a lot of houses over the past month or so that have cheerful American flag bunting on their fences, or little American flags planted in their yards, or patriotic signs trumpeting their enthusiasm for the anniversary, and part of me feels a little lift of festive joy… and another part of me feels like I have an immediate – and quite possibly biased and wrong! – insight into what kind of people they might be and what kind of beliefs they may hold. UGH. By the way: I am not saying that people more conservative than I am are “bad;” I know many people across the political spectrum who are good, kind, loving people… who simply have different views on some topics than I do. I don’t know. It’s kind of unfair, is what I’m saying, that a symbol of unity should instead carry with it the weight of judgment. As usual, I am not the first or the most articulate person to note this; but it’s particularly noteworthy to me as we inch closer to the Fourth of July.

Let’s turn to a less controversial topic, which is my cat. Poor Lenny was shut away in my room for SIX HOURS while the new air conditioner was being installed, because the HVAC people kept going in and out of the house. He bore the injustice of his imprisonment with dignity. But he did develop a winky eye, which of course made me worry that he had something seriously wrong with him. Carla and I took multiple videos and photos of him, and examined his winky eye in various lights from various angles. I envisioned eye drop prescriptions and Rachel Green-style interactions and surgical intervention and loss of the eye. I called the vet and asked their opinion; their opinion is always “bring him in.” I scheduled the first available appointment, forgetting that there were five (5) strangers meandering in and out of my house for the foreseeable future. I called the vet back and got a later appointment. I fretted as the appointment approached because the HVAC people were STILL THERE. Finally, with about forty minutes to spare, the HVAC people left. I released the cat from my room so he could use the litter box. When he reappeared, his winky eye had resolved completely.

I had texted my husband earlier in the day to alert him to the cat’s almost certain blindness. His response was “Maybe an eggshell.” This requires some backstory, which is that my husband’s colleague sent him home with some fresh eggs the other day, from her chickens. She’d packaged the eggs in a little clear egg carton and had included some instructions with them that said they should be stored on the counter. Well. Lenny was obsessed with the eggs. He must have been able to smell chicken on them? He didn’t bother them until there were only two left. At which point, I came home from Carla’s birthday shopping extravaganza to find the carton overturned on the floor, one egg completely unharmed, and the other broken. I cleaned everything up, returned the surviving egg to the carton, and put a package of insect repellent refills on top of it to make it more difficult to bat off the counter. Not difficult enough, it turns out. The next morning, we came into the kitchen to find the eggshell I’d rinsed and left on the counter to dry once again on the floor, the makeshift carton weight on the counter, and the egg carton on the floor. The remaining egg was still intact. Hence my husband’s assumption that eggshell was the source of Lenny’s winky eye.

Screenshot

I made crème brûlée for Carla’s birthday dessert, per her request. The recipe called for five egg yolks, and I saved the shells because I read that they can deter slugs. Which I think are destroying both my coleus plants and one of my hydrangea trees. I love how pretty the eggshells are, or were before I baked them and crushed them. I hope they help my coleus plants! This is the third year I’ve planted coleus in the same location, and the first time that I’ve had an issue.

What’s up with you this Wednesday? How hot is it where you are? What are you making to eat when you don’t want to turn on the oven?

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Tuesday Randomosity: Shopping and Entertaining and Far Too Hot Edition

Vent vent. The appliance repair person came last week to examine my hood vent. He opened up the hood vent, asked me to describe the problem, diagnosed the issue as a faulty user interface (the piece that has the buttons that turn the fan on and off), looked up the part, and discovered that my hood vent is discontinued and he cannot source a part for it. All this, including when I tearfully begged him to at least disconnect the fan so that it would stop running at all hours of the day and night, took five minutes and cost $160. I am still salty about the whole thing. (I emailed the vent hood manufacturer weeks ago, asking about companies that service this hood vent. I also gave the model number of my hood vent to the appliance repair company. Why neither of those people bothered to inform me that the hood vent was DISCONTINUED is beyond me.) But at least the fan is OFF. (And we can reconnect it if we need to make something on the stove, which I am still avoiding due to excessive heat.)

I am trying to decide if I need a sous vide badly enough to buy one for myself. Jen has completely influencered me into wanting one; apparently it is really good at making various curds and I love a good curd. But it’s expensive enough that it feels like something I should request as a gift. But… this one is also on a big sale for Prime Day ($121 down from $199), so maybe I should just bite the bullet and get one????? Do you have a sous vide? What do you use it for, if not for curds? (I am aware it does MANY things besides curd-making.) (Curd is a very weird word.) 

Do you need to be influencered into buying a new small appliance? If so, then I HIGHLY recommend this Cuisinart immersion blender. I use mine ALL the time. In fact – and this is super embarrassing to admit – I have TWO of them, and I use both of them weekly, if not daily. (It’s embarrassing to admit because I had one of them for a million years, or so long that I completely forgot it had the little chopper/grinder attachment. Then I bought a new one, which was different only in that it also came with a large mixing/measuring cup.) I use them for smoothies, dressings, dips. This past weekend I made an impromptu whipped feta using the chopper/grinder cup. It’s so easy to use and I love that it takes up less room in the dishwasher than my blender or my food processor. (The one I have is not technically on a Prime Day deal, but it is 25% off.) (Ooooh, this one by Mueller IS on a Prime Day deal – 37% off and only $31.55!) (Do I need a third immersion blender set? No, I do not. Right? Or do I?)

I just finished two books that used the same murder method! And it wasn’t a super common murder method, like strangling or whatever. It was a fairly specific method. I love it when I experience that kind of synchronicity in books. Like there’s something in the collective consciousness that makes writers reach for similar things at similar times. 

The first dinner party went off without a hitch. We ended up making balsamic pork in the crockpot, and then having all sorts of goodies alongside it: brown rice, crumbled feta, kalamata olives, caramelized onions, sundried tomatoes, and marinated artichoke hearts. I also made a quinoa salad to go alongside it. Where I went wrong, I think, is in the appetizers. I made hummus and the aforementioned whipped feta, and served both with veggies and pita chips. People seemed to fill up on the appetizers and then didn’t have a whole lot of room left for the main course. Because we had six people over, I doubled the pork recipe. And… we had SO MUCH pork leftover, Internet. So much pork. My husband and I had it for dinner again on Sunday, and then yesterday I paired the pork with a mango salsa to make it different enough for us to enjoy for a third day in a row, plus a small Tupperware container for me to eat for lunch, AND I still had a generous portion leftover that I put in the freezer for another time. We also have so much quinoa salad leftover. How does anyone know how much food to make? I felt SURE that six adults would eat AT LEAST as much food as my husband and I do on our own, but that didn’t seem to be the case???? I don’t think the food was bad, although I guess I can’t rule that out? Well. I have a second chance this weekend, as Dinner Party 2 is coming up. This time, I am making tacos, and guacamole, and maybe salsa. THAT’S IT. (Although I am fretting a bit about what sort of meat I should make. Just ground beef? Or should I also do shredded chicken?)

The best decision I made for the dinner party was to include a friend for Carla. I figured she would be bored by all the adults, so we arranged for her bestie come over and spend the night. I didn’t have to worry about either of them the whole night. I mean, I fed them. (They did NOT eat balsamic pork.) And my husband (and possibly the other adults as well) watched them in the pool. But they entertained one another and had a wonderful time. Unfortunately, the kids then stayed awake until THREE O’CLOCK AM IN THE MORNING. And felt the need to keep me updated about their awakeness approximately every hour. I have no problem with the kids not sleeping. It’s a sleepover; not-sleeping is expected. But I was exhausted from a day spent cooking and cleaning and entertaining and then I didn’t sleep more than a few interrupted hours, so I ended up being pretty useless both Sunday AND Monday. 

Is it hot where you are? It’s hot, isn’t it. It seems to be hot everywhere, in the US at least. (And Canada. HI NICOLE. I hope you are ensconced in air conditioning right now!) We had a thunderstorm this morning at about four, and so everything is wet, but it’s also hot already (I am writing this at six) and all our windows are steamed up. “Hot and humid” is my least favorite state of being. I walk around in a constant half-melted state. My hair is impossible and I have been wearing it in a ponytail so much my scalp hurts. My face is a zitty mess. My deodorant is working as hard as it can but cannot stanch the sweat. I am longing for winter. But not really, because I am also enjoying the heck out of having a pool. Carla and I went swimming last night before dinner and I love it so much. 

Our summer schedule is – finally – so awesome. We have really settled into a rhythm right now, and I love it. I wake up at six, make tea, wander around my garden, make a smoothie, wake up Carla and watch a million cat videos with her. Let’s not speak of the period between waking her up and getting her into the car for camp. While she’s at camp, I exercise and write. I am part of an honest-to-goodness writing club right now, and I’m loving it. I buy groceries and do laundry and make endless phone calls and appointments for our house. I pick up Carla, spend as much time outside as possible, make and eat dinner, watch a show with my husband, go to bed. Repeat. It’s so lovely. One thing I am dreading about the school year is having to shift everything again. Especially now, I am enjoying the quiet hour or so by myself before I wake Carla up… but I’ll have to wake her up an hour earlier during the school year and I don’t know that I have the kind of constitution that enables ME to wake up at five. We’ll see, I guess. I’m trying not to waste any of this glorious summer with WORRYING.

Back to complaining about the heat, I am ogling all sorts of fans on amazon right now. I really, really want a fan for our gym. I get so sweaty while working out, Internet. It is disgusting. Even just walking on the treadmill, I become a puddle. I often type while walking (I have a treadmill desk attachment that I love) and I leave these horrendous sweaty paw prints on the desk. But I know NOTHING about fans. This one looks good – I like the tower look and it gets good reviews, and it seems like a reasonable price? Maybe this pedestal one would be better? It’s supposedly “space saving,” although I don’t know that it takes up any less space except visual. Do you have a fan that you like? 

Also in an attempt to beat the heat, I have been buying dresses like crazy. Earlier this summer, I splurged on threeamazing dresses from Boden. I love them ALL. Yet I find myself coveting MORE DRESSES. All the dresses! This one is cute and seems more casual than the Boden ones. Do I need it??? (No. I definitely do not NEED it. Do I want it? Yes. Do I want it enough to buy it? Jury’s still out. Although it is only $15… Hmmm…) My husband also sent me a link to a “freezer dress,” which sounds deeply intriguing. It apparently has some sort of special fabric that cools as you sweat. That sounds kind of amazing?! Ooooh there’s a maxi dress version, too. 

Another good thing about summer? My hydrangeas! Look how beautiful they are! When they are on the bush, overloaded by the weight of their own blooms, they aren’t quite as lovely. But in a vase on my counter, they are pretty spectacular.

Okay, that’s all I have time for, Internet. I hope you are staying cool, whatever you’re doing.