So, I totally got an iPhone. Thank you very much for your helpful comments. I am still not sold that it was a great idea (so expensive!), but I am trying to ease into it. And I think that once I have a bitty baby to photograph 8,000 times a day, I will really appreciate it.
Speaking of which…
Internet, I am appealing to your collective kind nature here:
Please tell me your (PG) “getting labor started” stories.
Because I am ready to get this labor started, and it’s just NOT STARTING. My dear friend Kristina even gave me her No-Fail 3 Step Process and it did not work. Okay, so I only managed two of the three steps, but STILL.
Anyway, I have tried all the methods. (Except I am not drinking castor oil or eating sardines.) And will probably CONTINUE to try all the methods because I have to do SOMETHING while this baby decides whether to show up. What I really want here is COMFORT, possibly humor if you have some to spare.
What I do NOT want are horror stories about being 45 weeks pregnant or being in labor for 108 hours or… anything else that is horrible.
NOR do I want admonishments to “let Nature take its course.” Because I AM. I am not at my doctor’s house, begging her to induce me. No, I am writing this cranky blog post. Nature. Course. I GET IT.
And yet I am tired, Internet. (I know, I will be tireder when the baby arrives. I should sleep now.) (HA.) My belly weighs about a thousand pounds. I wake up 89 times a night to visit the restroom or wonder excitedly whether I’m in labor and then pout glumly when I am NOT, AGAIN. I go to work every day and have to endure, about seven zillion times, “You’re still here?!?” and “What are you DOING here?” and “Where is that baby?!?” Everyone I know is suddenly keenly interested in texting me to find out whether I’ve had the kid or not. (Have not.)
My parents are arriving in the next couple of days, having taken off work specifically to be here for This Joyous Event, and having picked a week so far past my due date they were SURE that there would be an honest-to-goodness infant here when they arrived. IT WOULD BE NICE TO HAVE AN INFANT TO PRESENT THEM.
Also, it’s hot. And my everything is swollen. My toes are so fat, the toenails are digging into the toe meat of the toes that used to be safely out of reach.
Also, the weekly emails that I signed up for to tell me that the baby was the size of a kumquat* or a honeydew melon or whatever? THEY ARE NOW TELLING ME WHAT IT’S LIKE TO HAVE A ONE-WEEK-OLD.
Please, tell me something comforting. Something that YOU, in my position, would have liked to hear.
In return, I am posting the first photos of myself ever in the history of this blog. It may be an inadequate payment, but this is all I have.
Me, at 21 weeks.
This was back in the day when I could still button jackets and sweaters and such.
Me, at 35 weeks.
This was when I felt pregnant, but still cute-ish. I could wear my rings, I could wear shoes. Life was good.
Me, at 41 weeks.
No rings. No ankles. No baby. COME OUT, BABY! COME OUT!
Actually, I don’t even need any Surefire Ways to Get Labor Started stories. I will take ANY stories that will distract me from the fact that there is no baby. ANY STORIES**.
* One week? The fruit the email compared the baby to was a durian fruit. Listen, I know what a durian fruit is because I’ve watched the Food Network for many years. But… it’s not a COMMON fruit. And, even though I happen to know what it IS, I still have never seen one in real life. It’s not something my local grocer puts out among the peaches and the mangoes. PICK A FRUIT EVERYBODY KNOWS, EMAIL. Also, one with less of a reputation for smelling and tasting like garbage flavored morning breath.
**As long as they aren’t horror stories about birth or labor or being overdue.
I somehow found these statistics very comforting:
http://spacefem.com/pregnant/charts/duedate0.php#nav
I liked knowing how much my odds went up, each and every day I was over due. Also, I remember everyone telling me that I shouldn’t wish late pregnancy away because newborns are so hard. But you know what? With both my daughters I found late pregnancy to be much more difficult, and would take a newborn any day over being 37+ weeks pregnant. So just know that what you’re going through now, is, in my opinion, the worst of it, and it only gets easier afterwards.
One last thing. Plan something wonderful every day. Because you will always look back on that last thing you did before becoming a mother, and odds are you will look back at it rather fondly. Even if doing anything at all sounds difficult, do something small. Lunch with a friend. Picnic at your favorite park (make the husband pack it.) I went to a concert, and I think it was the last concert I’ve been to, because taking a baby to a concert is a bit difficult.
YES. DITTO TO THIS. I would take a newborn over being 37+ weeks pregnant as well, much less over 40 wks. This is truly the hardest part.
I love the plan something wonderful every day advice, but I am SO TIRED. Wonderful to me is sitting on the couch and then going to bed at 9:00. And THANK YOU for the “newborn is better than 37+ weeks pregnant.” That is the first time I’ve heard that and it makes me feel tons better about BOTH THiNGS.
If that is no ankles, I’m in trouble.
My distractions:
a) (Only a distraction because I’m asking you to tell another story) Please consider writing something about how a fence sitter decided to go off planet. I hope I am remembering the analogy correctly or that sentence will make no sense.
b) I once has a boss who told me she was psychic and a reiki master and had once cast a demon out of a man into a ficus tree. The tree had given her permission to do so because it knew it was dying anyway.
I apologize for the shortness of my distractions, but I have no baby advice and anything I say would probably end up being counterproductive.
Hahahaha – I love the ficus story. And yes, someday I will tell the story about the decision to head into outer space. Well, it’s not a LONG story, although I’m sure I could make it long. Basically, it became a biological imperative – I couldn’t stop thinking about All Babies All the Time. There were other reasons, too, but perhaps those can be saved for later.
I assume you’ve gotten your membranes stripped? Because that sent me into labor within 5 hours at 39 weeks. It only works if your body is more or less ready though. 🙁
Nope. Not ready enough. 🙁
I walked up a very big hill 6 days before I had my son at 39ish weeks. It has taken me the better part of the last 2 years to connect the dots between that very long, uphill walk me then going into labor much earlier than I anticipated. But that’s my advice: find a hill and walk up, slowly but surely.
If its safe, treat yourself to a pregnancy massage tomorrow or Sunday!
You are such a CUTE, LITTLE pregnant lady!!
The last few weeks of pregnancy seem to take longer than all of the months before =(. But: IT WILL END! And you will have a wee, precious baby at the end!
I got induced at 41 weeks. Started the pit drip at 5 am (was up anyway, right?), needed the epidural on by 9, water broke at 11, baby came at 12:30. My body was ready, my baby was ready, and BOY, was I ready! It wasn’t cake, but was not too bad. Membrane stripping didn’t work for me, nor did grownup time with the husband. Nor did walking all over the freaking face of the earth… sorry. This has not been super hopeful. But I promise it will come! And then you will have a baby to nap with on your leave, which is fun.
The only way through it is through it. But if your body is ready (and it’s working on it, even if you can’t tell!) it will be easier. Not easy, but not those horror stories people tell you because they are unfeeling monsters who don’t care about scaring you senseless.
I myself have never been pregnant, so don’t have much advice about that. But, I do agree with a previous post.. You do make an adorable pregnant girl!
I think as in any uncomfortable situation .. One must try to remember it’s temporary and there is an end in sight.. In your case, the end brings a beautiful little bundle who will bring you so much joy, love and laughter!!
Wishing you a happy, healthy delivery and baby!!
You look great! I am sure you don’t feel that way but you really do look wonderful. (A picture of my feet at 40 weeks would do wonders for your confidence. Ha!) As someone who made it to 41w5d, I have so much sympathy for you. I remember thinking she would never, ever be born. Dramatic but true. It was my experience as well that the “sure fire” go into labor techniques were all worthless and designed to distract and frustrate pregnant women. I did enjoy all that super spicy Thai food though. So, no advice or horror stories from me. Just lots of understanding and hope your baby arrives SOON!
My only “getting labor started” story is one of the moms at the daycare where I worked, who said that she went out for a big steak dinner and went into labor that night. So then with her second baby, when she was getting impatient, she went out for a big steak dinner—kind of out of desperation, kind of out of superstitious hope. AND SHE WENT INTO LABOR THAT NIGHT. So!
I have a doesn’t-go-anywhere,-just-passing-the-time story about when I was in labor with my first. (I don’t know if that immediately provokes jealousy: I was IN LABOR! Why does EVERYONE ELSE get to be IN LABOR??) Anyway, my first indication was my water breaking, which is exactly what I’d HOPED would be the first indication. But it was very early, not time to call the doctor yet, and no contractions, so I was just wandering around in a happy daze, feeling happy to have plenty of time to do all the things on the “if there’s time before going to the hospital list” (fresh food and water for cats, one last load of laundry, putting my pillow with my bag). I was also feeling that pleasant “I have a secret and most people are going about their lives with NO IDEA” feeling I remembered from right after taking the pregnancy test. Anyway, I made brownies, and now EVERY TIME I make brownies, I remember those happy feelings. Also, I’d dropped a little brownie batter on my sock, and it got stained, and until that sock wore out I felt happy every time I wore it.
Haa, your brownie batter sock story is so much nicer than my sock story. Instead, I happily wear the socks I had on when Ryan was born because I was in such fast labor I didn’t have time to change my socks to the hospital issue ones. My stains are NOT from brownie batter. Same feeling of nostalgia though.
This makes me want to make brownies. I mean, more than the usual.
You are the cutest preggo woman ever. And I can’t even see your face. I thought I’d start with that, because I know it *feels* awful, but you look beautiful. And while you’ll sleep less? Maybe? But you know what? When the baby is here, it is a WAY DIFFERENT sleeping less. Sleeping less with a baby is way better than sleeping less while pregnant. So I feel you there.
As for getting labor started? I just walked. I walked so effing much. (I know, you’re probably walking a lot yourself right now, but keep doing it!!!) Every day. Sometimes twice a day. I let the doctor attempt to stir my membranes, which ended up not being too much bulging bc the bag of waters was in the way (tmi much?! lol), but within a few days of that I lost the mucous plug (which was as gross as it sounds. But! I lost it on a walk!) (more TMI? WAY MORE TMI? Yea. I’m sorry). I just walked and walked and walked. And bounced on an exercise ball. Several times a day. So much walking and bouncing. And then when labor actually DID start, it didn’t look like what I expected.
So I woke up a 3am (3 days after I lost that gross mucous plug) with what I thought was a relatively more intense, but not at all painful, braxton-hicks contraction. I went to the bathroom. I went back to bed and noticed that a had another one or two after that first one. So I just kind of thought, “OMG THIS IS IT. I HAVE TO KEEP MOVING.” So I got up and bounced on my exercise ball next to the bed for awhile. Then decided I was silly, so I climbed back in bed and laid there waiting for them to stop. Or come back. Or something. But I never went back to sleep. C got up at 4am, so I got up with him. I told him I’d been feeling fairly regular “contractions” but that they didn’t hurt. I also told him that I thought today might be the day the baby came out, but I wasn’t sure and didn’t want to jinx it. I knew it might mean something when he DIDN’T disagree (I had thought I was starting labor approximately 110348905 times before this and he had always told me I wasn’t, which pissed me off in a big way, but he was right…). So at 4am I decided to make rice krispy treats (for the nurses, in case this was labor), then cupcakes (for our anniversary, because it was our anniversary that day), and then I thought, “If this is labor, then I don’t want to come home to a dirty house,” so I vacuumed and dusted everything. I did a lot. I was also writing down every time I felt the tightening, non-painful contractions so as to time their regularity (anywhere between 8-12 min apart). Once it was light outside, I decided I couldn’t stop moving otherwise the contractions might stop, so I went for a walk. I walked a mile and a quarter. I was really hoping my water would break, actually. It never did.
So this went on ALL. DAY. LONG. Not so painful, but regular, every ten minutes. Around 1pm they got a little more uncomfortable, but certainly not painful. Then…. they puttered out around 4pm. If you ever want to see a pissed off pregnant woman, let her think she’s in labor all day and then have it stop. So I was furious, and C came home and I told him about the day, and he offered to check me to see if I had progressed at all (more TMI. Sorry again. I would’ve wanted these details if it were me asking, so… I’m sorry.) Turns out that all my non-painful contractions had brought me to 4cm. C said that if I started having painful, regular/closer contractions to let him know. Then at 10pm, active labor started. Hard and fast. And so goes the rest…
SO. I tell you all this for 2 reasons:
1) while nothing is guaranteed to jump start labor, walking is one of the best things you can do. The baby is in prime vertical position at that point to push down on your cervix and gravity can help it do its job. And it’s really true that staying active will generally help labor go more quickly.
2) Labor can be a sneaky beast and start slowly and suspiciously. It’s not always the grand show it looks like or sounds like at first.
Oh and bonus third? Trust your gut. If one night you wake up and you notice you’re having some consistent braxton-hickslike contractions, and your body and mind seem to tell you, “This is it.” It might actually be it. So keep on moving.
I’m sorry you’re still waiting. WAITING IS THE WORST. I FEEL YOU. It sucks and you’re uncomfortable and you just want to be done. You will be done soon, my friend. You will not be pregnant forever. You will not.
Man, I should have gotten an exercise ball! That sounds delightful right about now.
I just read the previous comments, and I wanted to echo some of their things:
1) plan things for every day. Try to do at least one thing every day. Besides walking, obviously, because that’s a given. But bonus points for extra walking. Every day could be your very last day without a baby, and life is dramatically different the moment that baby enters the world (which I’m sure you know : ) ). So if you feel up to do, do things that make memories.
2) If you don’t feel up for a massage, a pedicure is a great idea too. Not a sure-fire way to start labor, BUT, it’s so relaxing. And nice to treat yourself. I got a mani/pedi a day or two before I went into labor. It was so nice to have that time, and I think I might have fallen asleep in the chair while my feet/legs were being massaged. It was nice. Highly suggest, simply for your own comfort.
And one more thing about the walking (I know this is getting annoying. I’m sorry. I’ll stop soon)- I walked every day in the month leading up to my labor and though I was in latent labor for over 19 hrs, I was only actually in active labor for 8 hrs. That’s pretty short for a first baby. WALKING, BABY. WALKING!
I tell you these things because when I was in the waiting place like you, I wanted to hear all the freaking details of everyone’s birth story. I’m truly sorry if this is annoying for you. I am really hoping and praying that baby decides to come out soon.
Not annoying at ALL – very helpful!
As far as I know, the only scientifically proven ways to get labor started is membrane stripping and having sex. Sperm has prostaglandins and helps soften the cervix. So, you can always try that…
The other scientific method for starting labor is to take all the baby’s carefully folded, organized, and put away clothes and to dump them all out on the nursery floor, start rewashing, and reorganizing them. Make a huge mess. That will guarantee that you go into labor when you can’t clean it up first.
Oooh – the Big Messy Project technique! Genius!
I had my girls early – 36w, 35w5d. While the waiting game sucks, the anxiety about the early deliveries was terrible. Would they be too small? Would they be ok? Would their lungs be ok? (Minor issues with both that seemed monumental at the time, but are less frightening every day.)
That is neither here no there, but BOTH times I thought
Well, I’m really, really exhausted. I’m going to take off work, clean up around here and just start piling stuff up for the hospital. But I won’t pack a bag so I don’t jinx things.
BOTH TIMES, I had a baby that very day.
Good luck!
Here’s my story. I was 3 weeks overdue…it was the beginning of September and I had been having contractions off and on for a month. I watched a late night talk show and laughed very hard…went to bed, woke up and my water broke, called the doctor but no contractions. I hung up the phone, laid down in bed and contractions started every FIVE minutes. Tried to reach husband who was a policeman on the midnight shift. Finally got him home, contractions were every THREE minutes. We got to the hospital, got prepped and I had my son. Less than 2 hours from when I woke up at home. Quick delivery after waiting so long.
You are so cute! So adorable! I’m sure that’s the last thing you want to hear, and I’m sure you don’t FEEL adorable but you are. I don’t have any stories on how to get labour started, so I will just offer a few good stories:
1) When pregnant with my first, I got pre-eclampsia. By the time I was 36 weeks I had put on over fifty pounds and I was confined to bed rest, only allowed to be on my feet for 10 minutes at a time. At first it was kind of fun, lots of movies, etc. Then OMG death by boredom. I was relieved to be induced. Then – then – I was induced on my second wedding anniversary at 7:45 pm. They said, oh, first baby, you’ll be in it for the long haul. He was born at 11:55 pm. On our anniversary.
2) My second was born two weeks early and I was super stressed about getting child care for my then-17 month old. I had visions of being stuck at home with baby, having the baby in the bathroom or something. Fortunately this did not happen.
Oh, also! I was huge with both babies, but I “measured big” with my second. He was due at the end of September, and I’m not kidding, in June people were like “When are you having that baby? You look like you’re going to explode. Baby is late coming?” and then I’d be, well, I’m really only six months along…
What is wrong with people? Is it really that hard to keep one’s mouth shut when faced with a pregnant belly? NO COMMENTING ON THE PREGNANT PEOPLE.
I had no signs of labor with my second. I was forty one weeks and four days and miserable! I woke up about 1 am and my water had broken. This doesn’t help much I know but maybe you can take comfort in the fact that even with no signs it can happen quickly. I had her eight hours later and besides the one vomit incident it was an easy labor. Who knew puking was a sign it’s time to push?? Good luck!
You look amazing! I’m also starting to get really antsy (although I’m a few weeks behind you, so not due/overdue yet–I can’t imagine how I’d feel at 41 weeks). No real suggestions (but I’m scanning the comments for ideas!), although I hear if you put on your nicest clothing and go out somewhere really fancy and public your water would choose that exact moment to break. 😉
Hahaha – I had a meeting with my boss yesterday who had just gotten these beautiful, expensive brand new chairs delivered to his office. I was SURE my water would break right there in his office! (It didn’t.)
I’m going to go against all the ‘walk, walk, walk’ advice and say walking didn’t help me one damn bit. Tons of walking did not put me INTO labor and once I WAS in labor walking didn’t move it along. I was a bit…annoyed.
Although, with the second baby, I did go into labor after putting a ton of heavy boxes in my trunk for donation (nesting!). Try that, maybe?
Well, for what it was worth, I was always WAY WAY WAY LESS tired after the baby came than in late pregnancy. And it is not that my babies were superstar sleepers, either. I think the new mommy hormones really help.
Haven’t connected in awhile so wanted uo say hey! I know you can’t wait to have the baby, but you really do look cute!! Can’t wait to hear of the baby’s arrival! Best wishes!
I was cleaning up the house (very much needed) and my husband had left to go to Home Depot for a finishing touch on the nursery. I bent over to pick up something on the floor which made my water break. So maybe, bend over to pick some things up? hahaha. Oh, and my lovely husband had left his phone at home too so I sat on the toilet just dripping while I waited for him to get back. So, also maybe send away your husband WITHOUT HIS PHONE. Who does that when you have a very pregnant wife at home!?
I had Gracie a week early (SORRY!) but I’ve heard good things about pedicures with an extra strong foot/ankle rub with peppermint lotion. Get some AVeda peppermint foot lotion, take it to the salon and pay the extra $10 for an additional foot/leg massage. At the very least- comfy toes. You look ADORABLE
You may be headless but OMG WE SAW PHOTOS.
Sorry to hear you’re about ready to jump up and down to dislodge the babe, and even more so that I have zero advice.
My little pumpkin stayed comfortably (for him) in utero past 41 weeks. Since I had gestational diabetes, my OB scheduled an induction as I was terrified I would have to push out a 30 pounder! So no real labor story… Technically I was in labor for 24 hours but OB broke water after I was already contracting, so it was all very mild and calm.
I did crack up my doc though, mid push. Baby was right under pubic bone and so doc was helping him to get past it. It felt Like he was pushing the baby back in and so I loudly accused him of that… He snorted and almost covered the laugh…
When my wonderful nurse told me that I was at a 10 and doc would be there any minute, I was non plussed. She said I should start pushing. I was all “whatever”. TV and movies had me prepared to spend the next day screaming and sweating and swearing. Less than 3 minutes of pushing and the spawn of Sean was out!
Unfortunately, I had second degree lacerations. It wasn’t too bad, but I made the rookie mistake of looking about 2 days after… I told OB that I realized that human genitals are not generally the prettiest parts anyway, but that not looking was not in my discharges order packet. He told me – and this is why I adore him – that “they don’t call it bumping uglies for no reason!”
Once you are cleared to shower, do it! This is the last time you may have the chance to take a very hot and very long shower. I don’t know how big a hospitals water tank is, but I stayed in 30 min and it didn’t run out, which was a huge pleasure/luxury.
My little girl was late and it nearly was the end of me (mentally – omg people I barely know, stop texting me). BUT, the BEST part is late babies tend to eat better, sleep better, and be better natured 🙂 That little extra time to develop gives them bigger tummies and, man, the extra sleep a big tummy gives you is amazing…. I am already praying for a late baby for my next!
BTW, I also had steak for dinner the night I went into labor… And I had my husband do lots of ankle/shin accupressure for me.
Yeah, there is nothing. The “tricks” do not work. Just lay in your bed and moan until your time comes. That’s all I got.
Squats were what finally got my baby out. Sets of 10 six to ten times a day.
Just remember, the longer that baby is in there, the smarter it will be. Studies have shown that what is happening in these final days is mostly brain development. Also, my baby slept through the night at a month old and I (unscientifically) correlate it to the fact that he was “overdue”.
You’re at the worst part right now. It only gets better from here and the end is in sight. You can do this.
IT’S JULY 8! Surely baby has made grand appearance?! I THINK OF YOU EVERY DAY! In a non-creepy fashion. More of a, “I wonder how she’s doing? If the baby is here? If everyone is healthy?” fashion. I hope things are well and you and baby (and husband, I suppose) are well. Update when you can!!
Waiting for happy news, and hope everything is going well!
AH! I’m SO so so behind and feel awful (I feel off the face of the earth for a while and lost my favorites and have dreaded trying to get them back). A baby! wow! so exciting! I definitely baby has made an arrival by now!
I’ve just made my triumphant return to blogging today after having our kiddo nearly a month ago, and had to come check your blog…so glad to see that I’m not the only one who falls off the face of the internets post childbirth. We were “only” 6 days overdue, hope you didn’t go too much longer! Can’t wait to hear your story.
Oh man I feel you. I was at work and the daily comments really got to me. I was there when I went into labor (no water breakage though, actually not until I hit 9 cm did my water break). So just tell everyone to shut it. Your baby wants to wait for Cate & William’s baby.