I really, sincerely appreciated everyone’s thoughtful comments in response to my latest Food Fret. My big takeaway was that I should shut up about food, model the type of eating habits I want Carla to emulate, and try not to worry too much. This is usually the approach I take, and I think it is probably the smartest. That doesn’t mean it isn’t HARD, though. Food and eating are SO FRAUGHT.
One of the Big Tips you hear repeatedly when you are looking for information about helping your child eat more/better is to take them shopping with you. This is a practice I have been employing for years – and if Carla expresses an interest in trying a food, I am happy to procure it for her.
(There was the time when she wanted to try a clam, though, and I did end up drawing the line there. For one thing, I have no idea how to cook a clam so that it is remotely edible. For another, I personally do not find clams in any form to be edible. But the clincher was when, through gentle questioning, it turned out that Carla had confused “clam” with “oyster” and her real interest in getting a clam was to see if it had a pearl inside it. I am not researching “how to cook a clam” just so my child can see that it does not produce pearls.)
(I love her, she is so darling.)
Yesterday, I dragged Carla with me to the grocery store. It was after camp, so she was hungry, and she was very interested in buying food. I said yes to everything she asked for (except ice cream because we are already eating ice cream approximately eight million times a week and we do not need another pint of ice cream in our freezer) and I have washed all the fruit and made sure that everything is on a Carla Eye Level shelf for easy access, and now will anxiously wait to see how much of this bounty she eats.
I thought you might want to see what she chose. She bagged all of her own groceries, which made it pretty easy to photograph.
I did not organize the items in a way that makes it easy to see what is what, but I trust you can figure it out.
- Extra Sharp Cheddar Cheese: We already had an unopened block of cheese in the fridge, but in my opinion you can never have too much cheese. And cheese has protein and calcium so I am Pro Cheese.
- Demi Baguette: Carla ate half of this baguette in the car and the other half for dinner.
- Chobani Flip Cookie Dough Yogurt: Do these have more sugar than I would prefer? Yes. But they are still yogurt, so I let her eat as many as she wants.
- Watermelon: I hate watermelon, and I hate preparing a watermelon, and then having pounds of watermelon on hand, so I am happy to pay a convenience fee to buy the super expensive pre-sliced stuff so I don’t have to deal with it. The thing is, I don’t think Carla really likes watermelon either? I think she kind of likes the idea of watermelon. We’ll see if she eats this.
- Fully Cooked Bacon: She ate four slices of this for breakfast this morning, alongside a yogurt. I am choosing to see it as PROTEIN.
- Black Seedless Table Grapes: These grapes are teeny tiny, and Carla has – for unknown reasons – been looking for them for AGES. So when we saw them at the store, she immediately requested a carton. When we got home, she said she wanted to eat them the way the Romans did, and then requested that I feed them to her. No thank you, dear.
- Crepes: We had a brief conversation about what she might put IN the crepes, and she said fruit (so I also bought some strawberries, not pictured), so I said why not. This seems like something we may end up not eating, just because they seem kind of labor intensive.
- Golden Berries: She grabbed these on a whim, and so far I’m the only one of us who has tried them. They have the texture of a grape tomato but a pleasantly sweet-sour flavor.
- Raw Slivered Almonds: This was another impulse buy. As far as impulse buys go, I feel okay about it.
- Wax Beans: These are Carla’s favorite kind of string beans. I think they are a decent source of fiber and I am happy with any vegetable she wants to eat.
- Ham: Usually the only ham Carla will eat is inside a Lunchable, and I have declined to buy Lunchables anymore except on very rare occasions. But Carla went up to the deli counter herself and asked for the ham and then she ate some for dinner last night.
- Protein+ Spaghetti Noodles: This is Carla’s favorite noodle. She will eat a bowl of spaghetti with some meatballs on the side.
- Wholly Guacamole: While Carla eats way more chips than she does guacamole, I am happy to encourage her to eat guacamole. It’s got to be a gateway to avocados, right? (This was on sale, buy one get one free, which is a STEAL for these little packs.)
- Cookie: This was another impulse buy. It was at the checkout station and looked delicious, so why not. Carla took a bite, discovered it contained walnuts, and declined to eat any more of it. What a disappointment!
There were a few things I forgot to photograph!
- Frozen Meatballs: These were on sale, so I bought two packages. I do not eat ball-shaped foods, but I have no problem with other people doing so.
- Parmesan: Apparently Carla will put the powdered parmesan cheese on her pasta at school, so we bought some so she can do so at home. (Typically, she eats pasta with nothing on it. No olive oil, no butter. She won’t even let me salt the water.)
- Artichoke: The other night, we got takeout for dinner and my meal included a roasted artichoke. Carla TRIED THE ARTICHOKE, pronounced it “not bad” and then requested an artichoke at the grocery store. The jury is out on whether she will eat any of it, but I am hopeful!
Does she like Nutella crepes? Big hit over here. Dorothy is in her buttered noodle era with SO MUCH CHEEEEEESE. My kids also eat pre-cooked bacon, and YUCK YUCK YUCK. Jack got an omelet maker for Hanukkah, and he is SO INTO making little 2-egg omelets for himself and whoever else wants one. He uses whatever veggies we have on hand, usually pre cooked bacon (although it will cook uncooked bacon if it’s chopped up), cheese, etc. Maybe a gadget like that would encourage healthier snacking/home lunches and more experimentation, etc? (I also hate preparing watermelon— so sticky! And always too much melon. I buy pre cubed or pre sliced, too, but it scandalizes Ben)
North likes those flip yogurts, too, and we have the same reservation about sugar, but we buy them anyway because we are trying not to pass judgement about food (out loud).
An artichoke? That’s impressive.
Yay- I’m glad you’re trying to worry less about this (it’s hard- I know.) All these food choices seem good- I mean we could pick it apart and find fault if we wanted to, BUT WE WON’T, because this is all real food and not horribly processed crap.
I should bring Angie to the store with me sometime and see what she picks out- it’s a good idea.
And, I’m laughing at Carla eating her pasta PLAIN. Why???
I think this is great! There is a decent variety to what she chose! My child refuses to eat fruit so I would be majorly celebrating if he was willing to try some fruits. I might even feed them to him like he was a Roman God if that meant he ate fruit!
I actually do not mind cutting up watermelon. But meal prep kind of gets me out of kid duty so I guess it’s a good trade off (I spend long solo stretches with the kids on the weekend so feel I earn the time off!). I am the only one that reliably eats watermelon, though, and it’s such a gamble to buy one. Taco will sometimes eat watermelon but only if the watermelon is really good. The one we bought last week wasn’t great. I cube it and eat it throughout the week as a night time snap which then means I have to go to the bathroom perhaps twice during the night but so it goes.
We do not take our children grocery shopping because we divide and conquer in the morning. Phil grocery shops and I do something with the kids. But I would be open to trying a mid-week grocery shop with Paul to see if he would eat more foods if he had some say in what he picked out. But I fear it would be carbs, carbs, and more carbs.
My suggestion for the watermelon is to cut it in small cubes and freeze it. For some reason frozen watermelon tastes even better than fresh. My kids love it. (You may need to leave it out for a few minutes before eating if it’s too hard when frozen.)
Ooh! Love Wegman’s. Among other things, the bakery section has so many delicious treats.
That’s cute about the clam. Oysters and clams are on my NO WAY list. Watermelon too. I can never get enough cheese and love bacon. It sounds like Carla partook of quite a few of the chosen foods.
I hate buying food and then no one eats it, I am hopeful that Carla will eat much of this. I’ve never tried those pre-made crepes, but have wondered if they are good or not. Maybe some whipped cream in with the strawberries? I’m not generally a fan of pre-cooked bacon, but it’s convenient for an omelette or a scramble. I sometimes buy pre cut melon because I can see the color and get SOME idea of how ripe it is. Also, no one else around here eats it, so buying an entire melon would be a waste. Unless it’s a cantaloupe from the farmer’s market…sometimes that pays off.
I totally understand about the watermelon! I also like the idea of watermelon, and I’m almost always disappointed. And I’d much rather buy it pre-cut!
I am with you on buying precut fruit, particularly watermelon. I bought a whole watermelon the day before everyone in our house got covid, and I was the only one to eat it. Despite eating it with every meal, I wasted a full ziploc bag of cut up watermelon. 😔
Watermelon! I want to like it, too, but generally do not. But several years ago, our now defunct CSA gave us personal-sized watermelons (they were smaller than a cantaloupe) and it was the best thing I’ve ever eaten and if all watermelons tasted like that, I would be a fan. Alas, most watermelon tastes like water with a hint of dirt.
I’m over here debating about whether or not to admit to you that I was today years old when I learned oysters and clams are not the same thing. Hmmmm…this is what happens when seafood is not a thing in your life, I guess.
Watermelon and tomatoes are just my favorites- you make it hard to love you, sometimes.
lol.
The very VERY low stress of a shoulder shrug and a “this is what we’re having, either eat it now or you can have it later when you’re hungry or wait for breakfast tomorrow- but no other snacks or treats after dinner if you don’t eat.”- that has been such a lifesaver around my house. Don’t be fraught, you just do you and expect the kids to come along after- it really does work.
Seems like some solid choices were made. I think having her involved in the buying and creating meals will really help her come along.
This is so full of awesome. I always loved grocery shopping with a kid. The whole thing IS so fraught, and it can be so hard to find the right path. I love the pearl in a clam story – their little minds are endlessly fascinating.
just in case you hadn’t seen it – if your ham is Boars Head they just had a massive recall for listeria.
The hardest part about parenting, for me anyway, is keeping my mouth shut. It’s simple but ouch it is so hard.
When the boys were little the grocery store had a place where kids could play, so my husband would always take them there while we shopped, which I always thought was a mistake. Childhood should be spent being dragged along with your parents at the grocery store!
I’m laughing at the clam story because that’s pretty much what happens when we try to get the boys’ input on meals. Hey if they really want to make [insert weird food here], they are free to do that when they’re grown up and ready to put the time and money into buying it and then learning how to cook it.
I’m with you 100% on not wanting to cut up watermelon. The worst part is that even if I did want to take the trouble, I’m the only one in my house who eats it so I’m stuck with the whole frickin’ watermelon to eat.
Variety and nutrition and practicality. You did well, fret no more!
This shopping update is fascinating! It sounds like shes tried some good foods. I felt very lucky reading your post that my children are so little. I do worry about their eating, but at least being kids they can’t be *weird* about food the way older kids can. Also, it helped me to read all the comments on how awful everyone ate as a teen. I recenlty asked my husband how we can make our kids more prepared for life so they don’t have to do all the stupid stuff we did. I then realized I’m fairly sure that’s what life is… a series of the stupid stuff I did. Anyways, I really hope you feel good about your shop and your approach. It sounds like Carla is being adventurous in her own way.
What a good way to have her come along while grocery shopping. I bet she eats more now even though you could have bought the same stuff. I loved going shopping with my mom. One of my favorite experiences.
Oh, I love this idea to take Carla to the grocery store and let her pick out some food ideas! It’s not all going to be healthy, of course, but it will start giving her an idea of what foods she likes, which ones make her feel good, etc. I love this development!
I am bougie and hate cutting up fruit/veggies so I ALWAYS pay more for something pre-chopped. The convenience is worth it!
Oh, packaged crepes! Such an easy thing to “mock up”… you can just sprinkle a little cinnamon sugar on it, spread some jam, or make it even savory with the shredded cheese you bought!
I also love that she tried artichoke! Now that’s a vegetable not every kid/teen would try!
I hate watermelon. I do not know how to tell if one is good or not. Thump it? What should I expect to hear? I am very entertained by the fact that you don’t eat ball shape food. Bah ha ha. I would not know how to prepare an artichoke.
I had no idea there were so many dislikers-of-watermelon! I love good watermelon – precut preferred, thanks. I saw your follow up post so know some of this has not been consumed, and other stuff (the watermelon, sigh) went bad. Can you get fruit or anything from a self-serve bar? That might be one way to try some things (olives, etc.) that you don’t want to buy in mass quantities. But overall? I LOVE this! I see protein, and calcium, and healthy carbs, and treats, and they are all things that Carla selected. You are awesome for supporting her in finding things that work for her. So many parents do not. You are doing an amazing job. <3