One of the things I love about blogging – and this blogging community specifically – is that we are all roughly Going Through It at the same time. I feel very comfortable sharing the ups and downs of life, because it seems like you are going through similar ups and downs. Or have recently done so, or are in a stage I recognize quite well from being In It myself fairly recently. The commiseration is so bolstering, and I find the helpful hints and advice that your share in posts and comment sections to be invaluable.
Sometimes I need specific and mundane advice, like “what’s the best mascara,” and other times what I really need is more of Life Coach Guidance. Lately, I have some questions of both varieties that keep going round and round in my head with no resolution, and I am hoping that you might have some helpful hints or advice to share. Anything and everything would be useful.
Girls’ Weekend: I find myself in charge of a dear person’s Major Birthday celebration, or at least in charge of Getting The Ball Rolling (what I am hoping to do is come up with two or three really good ideas that I can then share with the birthday girl, and she can – hopefully! – choose one option.). But I feel COMPLETELY OUT OF MY DEPTH. Yes, the all caps are necessary. You, however, are much more social and well organized than I am, so I am turning to you for help. WHAT CAN I DO for a low-key, not exorbitantly expensive girls’ weekend?
The birthday girl is not particularly picky, which is good… but also, it would be nice to have more specific guidance… OH WELL, we do not have more specific guidance, or any guidance at all outside of the request that the four invitees “spend time together.” And also, children are not invited.
Here are some things that are important but add to the challenge: The birthday girl does not drink. She does not really eat. She is not particularly outdoorsy. These things are helpful for ruling options out. My initial thought was spa weekend! That sounds lovely and doesn’t have to involve alcohol or lavish meals or hiking/biking/skiing/swimming. But I did some research into spas and/or hotels with spas and they are SO EXPENSIVE. I don’t even know what the budget should be, but it should not be LUXURY WEEKEND level, you know? For example, one hotel-with-spa I looked at was $788 per room per night. This is not even taking airfare into account, or the cost of spa treatments; this is lodging alone. AND THAT WAS ON THE LOW END OF MY RESEARCH. Oh: that’s the other thing. I would want us to all have separate rooms. I mean, I suppose some combination of the others might want to stay in a room together, but I require my own room. This could be four bedrooms in a rented house (although my husband says he no longer trusts Air BnB for reasons that are not entirely clear? Do you still trust Air BnB?) or it could be four rooms in a hotel. For ease of travel, the celebration probably should be near Chicago or New York City, which are relatively easy for each of us to get to via plane. (Are there awesome girls’ weekend options in Madison? Minneapolis?)
Do you have any ideas? Any ideas at all???? Literally the only idea I’ve had, aside from “spa weekend,” is “go to NYC and see a play.” But even THAT makes me hyperventilate because… Which play? Where would we stay? Where would we eat? What else would we do besides see a play? I honestly hate New York City. BUT. The birthday girl does not, and this is about her, not about me so maybe that will be one option to present her. Which still leaves me in need of at least one other option.
What would you want to do for a girls’ weekend? Have you been on any girls’ weekends or family trips or couple’s getaways or work events that were especially fun? Why do I keep thinking about axe throwing? I do not want to throw weaponry!
Protein Powder: Is there a protein powder that doesn’t taste like… anything? I really want a protein powder that has NO TASTE. I had a long conversation with a chatty nutrition expert in the supplements aisle of my grocery store the other day, and she recommended I try Epic Protein by Sprout Living. Mainly, I think, because I told her I wanted to try a sample before I spent $20+ on a giant tub of protein powder and the options were sort of limited. I got the chocolate maca flavor and also the vanilla flavor. It took me a long time to try either of them, and I have only finally tried the chocolate one. I blended it up with some coffee, ice cubes, vanilla extract, and skim milk and then threw in a tablespoon of mini chocolate chips for good measure, and it was… drinkable. Not good; I would not describe it as good. It was far, far less disgusting than the only other protein powder I’ve tried. It was a Garden of Life vanilla powder and I mixed half of a sample packet into a homemade Orange Julius (almond milk, orange juice, vanilla extract, ice) and it was so horrific that I had to pour it out without finishing it. The chatty nutrition expert said that all protein powders taste like something, but… really?
Annual Birthday Planning Angst: Speaking of birthdays, which I was awhile ago, Carla’s birthday is coming up and it is once again time for me to stress endlessly about her party. It always works out and yet I have so much anxiety around every aspect of her party each year. This year, Carla has Very Specific Ideas, which, as you might recall from several paragraphs ago, I was begging for. In this case, they are perhaps a bit TOO specific. She would like a wolf theme. She would like a three-layer cake; the middle layer should be chocolate, the other layers should be white; there should be raspberry something between the layers; the frosting should be GREY. Deep breaths. I cannot picture a grey cake, which sounds the opposite of appetizing, so I will do some googling after this. But the cake is honestly the LEAST of my concerns.
For her party, Carla would like to do a nature walk and then go to a park somewhere. Okay, so the reaction to that is probably, “Aww! That’s so cute! That sounds lovely and low-key!” And it is, it is lovely and low-key. She is such a nature lover and that makes me so happy and obviously I want her to have the party she wants. And yet… HOW am I going to pull this off?
Here are my concerns:
1. My child is turning ten, and presumably will invite other ten-year-olds. Won’t they find a nature walk kind of boring???? Part of me says, it doesn’t MATTER what the other kids think, as long as Carla likes it. And this is partially true. It’s Carla’s party; it should be the party she wants. But also, we are inviting friends to join us, and I think that creates an obligation to entertain said friends. And also also, if her friends are bored, isn’t that going to make her feel bad? These kids are 100% at the age where one of them might announce, loudly, with an eyeroll: “This is the most boring party ever.” That would crush Carla!
2. HOW am I going to arrange a nature walk? I don’t know about nature! Carla cheerily suggested that we bring her iPad and load up Merlin Bird ID so we can all see which birds are around, which is pretty much the most adorable thing I’ve ever heard, but deeply impractical when you are talking about hosting multiple ten-year-old children. We are fortunate to live near some beautiful nature preserves, but the parties they offer seem more specific (about bugs or about fairies, in one case) and also geared toward younger children. One local science center offers a bird-themed birthday, which could be okay… although part of the entertainment is dissecting an owl pellet. This is 100% in Carla’s wheelhouse, but once again I wonder: will her guests enjoy that? Even if they aren’t squeamish, they already dissected an owl pellet in school, so it won’t be new or exciting. A friend suggested geocaching, but I know NOTHING ABOUT THAT. Is “geocaching party leader” a job? Can you hire people to do that?
3. We cannot do a nature walk and then go to a park. Just being adjacent to thinking about transportation logistics – not even actually thinking about it! – makes me dizzy.
4. How do you wrangle/keep track of 10-15 ten-year-olds during a nature walk? Wouldn’t we need extra adults to help? A friend very kindly offered her services, but… can I do that to her? I could probably hire a couple of babysitters to join us, but then we have two extra people to fit into the planning. Are there… nature walk games that we can play? What would those be?
5. WHAT IS A WOLF THEME? What does that mean? Is that even a thing?! I have not googled yet, and I suppose that might help allay some of that particular worry, but… WOLF THEME?!?!?!?!?!
Housewarming: If all continues to progress as needed, my parents will be moving nearby this summer. It is SO exciting. I would love to get them a housewarming present, but… what? They aren’t big on stuff, although they will need to buy all of the normal day-to-day items necessary for living in a house. For various reasons, things I normally think of as “standard housewarming” fare, like wine or candles, are off the table. I could splurge on some really fancy Champagne; they would probably like that. Maybe a big pile of books about local drives or local hikes? A welcome mat? New towels? (But how do you buy someone towels without knowing their color scheme?) When we moved into our house a million years ago, I would have loved a gift certificate to Home Depot or the like. But it feels a little weird to buy a gift card for one’s parents. I suppose “feels a little weird” isn’t a reason not to do it. But maybe there is a better idea?
So Many Gifts: Thinking about a housewarming gift reminds me that this is the time of year when I need to think of So! Many! Gifts! My niece’s birthday is coming up; she will be seven and likes Pokemon and STEM activities. Our Girl Scout troop leader is retiring; we need something for her, but I don’t know what says “thank you for expending a truly heroic amount of time and energy on my child over the past five years.” Probably we will contribute money to teacher gifts, and then maybe do gift cards for Carla’s activities coaches? And then Carla will be TEN, which feels like an opportunity to get her Something Special… but I’m not sure what that would be; she is very spoiled. (We are not getting her a phone.) Plus, Mother’s Day and Father’s Day are coming up, and I am just… idealess on that front. Lots of gift giving opportunities and my brain is refusing to come up with anything reasonable for any of them. Have you given or received any really spectacular gifts recently?
Good Socks. All of my socks are terrible. I think I have only recently noticed this because I now wear shoes in the house every moment that I am not sleeping or showering. Every day, I wear a pair of ankle-height athletic socks. It seems like every pair either has holes in them or they slide down the back of my heel while I am doing normal things like walking. I tend to buy those big packages of Puma socks and the like from Costco, and maybe the solution is “spend more money on socks.” Is that what I need to do? What socks are worth spending money on? I do have two pairs of compression socks that I rather like. But I can’t find either pair for some reason right now. They are hiding. I would love to do a massive sock purge and replace all the crummy socks with new, super awesome ones. Do you have socks you feel particularly evangelical about?
Okay, I think that’s it. I am both less stressed than I come across in writing, and more stressed than probably is reasonable, and I would LOVE your advice. Even if it’s just a CORNER of advice, like, “I have no idea where you should go for your girls’ weekend, but I just went axe-throwing over the weekend and it was so fun!” Or “Three years ago, I bought my dad THIS and he’s loved it ever since.”
And if YOU need advice, please, ask away. Perhaps one of the wonderful members of this community will have JUST the suggestion you need.
I always appreciate socks, especially when I haven’t been able to get a pedicure in a while. Or on cold nights. I do spend more on my socks than I need to, but I like them. As for gifts for a 7 year old girl who likes STEM activities, here’s a link for a glowing terrarium https://smartkidsplanet.com/collections/stem-toys-7-8-year-olds/products/luminous-magical-terrarium and on the higher end of the price scale: an interactive globe: https://smartkidsplanet.com/collections/stem-toys-7-8-year-olds/products/the-wonderful-world-of-learning
I LOVE the wolf theme for a birthday! Carla sounds so awesome!
Are you making the cake? If so look up simple dog cake plans (basically make a round cake and a square cake and the cut out ears from the square cake and stick them on then frost and decorate. My mom did this sort of thing for us a lot as kids.
What about a simple scavenger hunt for the kids on a trail you know well? Things like find three certain kinds of trees, spotting birds etc. There could be prizes especially if it’s in a sort of bingo format which helps randomise the winners.
Since you mentioned Madison area, check out Sundara Inn and Spa in Wisconsin Dells! I have not personally been there but it is well known as an amazing place from many people I know who have been there! It’s less than an hour from Madison and looks beautiful. It’s a very popular destination for girls weekends or 40th birthdays or anniversary trips, and I always hear great things! Plus, it’s located in a beautiful part of the state that feels “in nature” but you don’t actually have to hike or anything. 😉
Well, I don’t know your area or spas near Chicago or NYC but I’ll give it a try. If you wanted to do a spa weekend, I would definitely consider renting a house/ condo. If I was doing that I would go to Banff or Canmore, and find a nearby spa – there are tons of them there. I don’t have any problems with Air B&B but then I don’t pay attention to the news so something could be up that I don’t know about.
My sons and husband use an unflavoured protein powder that they really like, I will find the brand out for you. It’s a “bodybuilding” powder, but what I’m saying is that they do exist. I really love Protein Works vegan protein but this is very much a YMMV situation. It makes a very thick foamy shake/ smoothie, which may or may not be what you’re interested in, but the flavours are good. I don’t think they have unflavoured.
I don’t know about the birthday party, but maybe a scavenger hunt at a local woodsy place, with prizes? The owl thing might be good for an activity though.
For housewarming, what about a nice plant?
For athletic socks, I buy the expensive ones from lululemon and they really do last a long time.
I don’t think I have any other advice! Good luck!
I just realized this morning that this sounds like I’m encouraging you to come up to Banff. I mean, yes, please do, but also, that wasn’t what I meant at all! I was just thinking what I would do if this were on my plate, and that maybe there is someplace nearby with nice reasonably priced spas…
The guys use “Impact” whey protein, but it’s meant for “bulking” so probably my comment is the least helpful of the bunch!
If I were planning a girls weekend (I am in the SF Bay Area) I would rent a big house near the coast where we could hang out, people who wanted to hike could hike, there was an ocean nearby where we could swim and/or do walks on the beach and maybe have a spa option? Do you all have to be together all of the time?
I have tried the chocolate version of this protein powder and I like it and they also have an unflavored one which has received good reviews, but it doesn’t have many calories if you are looking for a meal replacement. However, if you just want protein, I like the company! https://www.theisopurecompany.com/en-us/Products/ISOPURE%C2%AE-WHEY-PROTEIN-ISOLATE-UNFLAVORED/p/C101302
I would suggest a scavenger hunt at a park for Clara. I do a scavenger hunt about once a month with my friend’s 12 year old and she LOVES it. You can find examples online easily, or could make your own. To make it more fun, you could have prizes, which everybody loves, right!? Then you could also have a picnic area where the adults can hang out. If you don’t feel like socializing, put the adults to work! I am always happy to feel useful when I go to someone’s party.
Socks! I also buy the Costco Pumas, but they don’t really last that long. I really love Stance socks, but they are not cheap. Also Darn Tough and Swiftwick are good. I have heard Bombas are good, but have never tried them. I think good quality socks are a great gift, since that is something I won’t really buy for myself but is not that expensive if you are just buying one for someone.
I made gray frosting once, accidentally, by using “natural” blue food dye (my kid was five and reacted badly to red food dye, so we were staying away from all of it). But he wanted a blue cake, so I got these natural food dyes, and used the blue..and it turned gray.
Or, and this would only work if Carla likes Cookies and Cream flavors, I made a “Door of Moria” cake once, and put finely crushed Oreos in vanilla frosting and it looked very, very gray and much like the stone door in the Lord of the Rings. My kids were pleased.
Does Carla like raptors? Perhaps there is a raptor rescue place in a woodsy area by you, as there is here, where the workers will show the kids the birds and talk about them, and there’s trails nearby? A long shot, I know, but we have a place like that here and it was a big hit for my bird-loving crew. Plus OWLS.
For the housewarming, if you’re not keen on getting an indoor decor thing, maybe a pretty planter for their front porch? When we were moving out of a rental where the landlord had been a jerk to us, they had another renter lined up and I noticed the landlord had put a lovely planter on the front porch, as a welcome—which would have been nice when WE moved in, but what we got were multiple bags of mulch they hadn’t spread on all the garden beds yet. Ha.
1) Girls weekend – maybe look at the Mario Tricoci (tricoci.com) in Chicago? It has easy access to the magnificent mile and a large spa area to hang out in when you are not being pampered. Maybe you know, but the magnificent mile has easy access to good restaurants, fun shopping, the art institute, millenium park etc. You could do a river/lake boat tour if you wanted as well. I have done this for a bachelorette party and had a good time.
2) Do you forest preserves have nature centers? Some of the ones around here have play areas and fish tanks and educational stuff. My kids’ favorite has replicas of the poop of various critters you might find in the woods. Some will even do guided walks for a group if you make arrangements beforehand. (I think this is often for scout groups). I just hosted a party for a group off 10 year olds and was quite surprised how much more guidance and planned activities they needed. The party I hosted for my 12 year old was just them snacking and talking and they did NOT want to have games planned out. I followed suit for my 10 year old and they got a little bored and wild because they very much DID want planned activities.
3) Socks – do you, uh, have large feet? I do. Buying socks that fit feet from 4-10 is no longer good for me. I buy ones up to shoe size 11 (even though that’s not my shoe size) and that has dramatically increased my socks staying in place and being nice to wear. It doesn’t require spending a lot but has really improved my sock satisfaction.
You know I am here for the sock challenges. My husband loves Darn Tough – they are pricey but do have a lifetime guarantee (which he has used) and they come in all sorts of shapes and sizes and thicknesses.
I am also keen to find a good protein powder.
I love the idea of a plant/planter for your parents if you want to give them a housewarming gift. Another option would be something like some delicious freezer meals from a local restaurant or a gift card to a local tasting place? I think they’re moving from a country setting? I just saw a blogger post about a motion-sensor bird feeder that sounds super cool! She can watch the wildlife in her backyard up close and personal. I think my Dad would love this…
One of my goals is to go to NYC with my best friend before she turns 40…but it would just be the two of us.
We do candy hunts for all my kid’s parties – sometimes inside, sometimes out and these tend to be the most beloved part of the whole experience 🙂
I would take your description of the wolf cake and farm that out immediately to a good bakery. (You could quickly google image search Wolf Birthday Cake first if you want.)
As a former teacher of 30+ years, allow me to weigh in on the Gifts For Teachers. Please do not get a mug or anything that says Teacher on it. Please do not get a Hallmarky Plaque about Teachers or Teaching. Chances are they already have a bunch of those things. I always appreciated nice chocolates, restaurant gift cards, Amazon gift cards, and even gift cards to Office Max or Staples. I still have, all these years later, letters of appreciation written by parents and students. They are precious to me.
If I were in Chicago: I’d want to see the Bean and do a Frank Lloyd Wright tour. I’d also want to see some Mies VD Rohe stuff, but maybe that’s too much architecture. I’d also want I’d also look for an independent bookstore in a cool part of town and wander around the neighborhood a bit. I know the person isn’t a foodie, but you do have to eat, so I love looking for cheap, funky, neighborhood eats. And you can just book pedicures or something at a regular place for some pampering if you’d like. Have fun!
I snuck a peak at Melissa’s comment. When we went to CHI last year we did a riverboat architectural tour that was really fun. NYC can offer that too. You know my 2nd suggestion is an FLW house tour if your group is in to that.
Airbnb is a mixed bag. I’ve had mostly good experiences and prefer it over hotels. It just depends if you can find something nicer/unique/makes sense cost wise vs a hotel.
Frickin protein powders. Let me know if you find a good one.
Happy-soon-to-be-DOUBLE-DIGITS to Carla!!! I’m for letting your friends help out with the hike. If you know someone who’s into geocaching that would be fun for the kids. As someone who’s been on a few short geocaches with my boy scouts, it’s not something that I can do on my own, but I think the kids would enjoy it so if you know an adult who’s good at it, let them help you. I know it freaks you out, but are there any wolf sanctuaries in your area? I think it would be too expensive for a party but maybe she’d like to go with your husband as an extra birthday present.
My parents would never, ever take a gift card from me. Champagne would be very welcome though. Note to self: my husband doesn’t like champagne and my parents and I do, so I should get us a bottle sometime.
I got nothing for gifts or socks!
Definitely come to Madison and make sure you can spend an extra day so we can hang 🙂 There ARE spas around here (and in Chicago, obvs). My high school besties are renting a house in Galena for a weekend to celebrate our 45th– we are going to cook, sit in a hot tub, and likely have some wine. We also discussed going to Florida to do a similar thing but on the beach.
Do the nature party dissection — anything with a party planner or, like, party host is the way to go. Have parents come back and pick up after that part is over and move the cake and food to a fun playground park– parents invited for that part mostly so they can drive their kids LOL? Also LEAN IN to the wolf theme and get cute little wolf stuffies and those totally hideous screen-printed wolf t-shirts for everyone.
I am terrible at parent gifts, so I would overspend on champagne and an amazing plant as a way to compensate for not being thoughtful.
Dorothy LOVES going to Kendra Scott to make jewelry at the color bar on her birthday. She also enjoys a shopping spree and a mani/pedi with me, which is really fun. She also opens gifts, but the girls’ day out is so great as an addition.
So much going on. Exciting times.
I love airbnbs and I think that would work great. Four bedrooms for separation but common space for gathering. What about an art museum- Chicago’s art Institute is amazing? Or a comedy club? Or a show? Or Chicago’s architectural tour? Some places have that interactive Van Gogh . . . I think Chicago might.
If she wants a gray cake and she wants a wolf theme, what about a wolf cake- white frosting with gray/silver/black sprinkles or sugar? Instead of a nature walk what if you do a scavenger hunt with facts/photos/small stuffed wolf toys/paw prints hidden somewhere- like a park? It could end with the guests/team who gather the most prizes win. Or do a trivia game- real wolf facts mixed in with fake wolf facts and points for every time a team.guesses correctly.
My sister bought our folks a digital frame. We can all upload pics to it from a distance. Then the photos scroll thru and they sometimes have new pics to enjoy. It’s called Aura.
My friends and I do a trip every year where we rent a house (through AirBNB, I don’t know why you wouldn’t trust them?) and treat it like a writing/craft retreat. We paint and work on our novels, and sometimes go for a hike or antiquing. But maybe it seems like your friends aren’t into that? Anyway, renting a house is going to be way cheaper than a hotel! As for socks, seconding Darn Tough, they are expensive but they last forever. I have some that are 5 years old but still look brand new.
Socks! I love Bombas and am slowly replacing all of my cruddy 12 to a pack ones with them. I have a bunch of knee high compression socks which are great if I’m driving or walking around a lot, but the ones I wear the most are their footies/ankle socks. They’re a great company to buy from also- I’ve had to return a few gifts for being the wrong size and in each case they’ve asked me to give away/donate the incorrect pair rather than return it to them.
I remember being very excited to reach 10, and be in double digits! Ha, not so excited about that now.
For your parents, if you don’t think they would want you giving them gift cards, maybe an info packet with locations of stores and restaurants you think they would want to know about? When I was moving to a new town, I did a lot of looking at maps and googling “where is the nearest XYZ” and would have been delighted to have someone tell me all that. Also places that Carla likes that they might enjoy taking her!
I typed a long comment and then deleted the tab on accident, so I’m super smart.
1. If you do end up coming to Madison, can I get in on the meet-up? 😉
2. Can you ask Carla what a wolf theme party looks like to her? She’s old enough to help starting planning, right? Maybe she just thinks coloring some wolf-themed pages and a cake is just the right amount of theme? Do you have a local zoo with a wolf habitat? Maybe do a party there?
3. Housewarming gift! An address stamp with the new address on it! It’s practical! They probably don’t have one! I bought one when my FIL and his new wife combined their two houses and she has commented no fewer than three times that she loves it and uses it regularly and it saves her a lot of time. I bought from stampmyworld on Etsy. Quick, easy, a big hit!
4. Socks. People are still wearing cotton socks? I didn’t know this. I wear sockguy socks for athletic things (sockguy.org). I have had some of my sockguy socks for more than a decade and they still look like new. I wear SmartWool for the rest of my life outside of working out. I want to like Darn Tough, but I don’t really like the wool they use, to be honest. Bombas socks are cozy, but they fall apart very quickly. (I also do not own any plain white or plain black socks, so forgive me for always having clashing socks.)
Girls’ weekend-I’m nearly 67 and have never done one. I love NYC but it’s a frenetic place and expensive. You said the birthday girl likes it though? I would definitely give some options but put the decision on her.
Carla birthday-I would have a cake with a forest/water on it and perhaps some toy wolves. Although I do adore wolves, gray frosting would be unappetizing. Is there an outdoor place where you could do a scavenger hunt? They are fun, and the kids get lots of semi-organized exercise.
Socks-Another Bombas fan here.
I was GREAT at animal theme cakes! Dolphin theme? Blue cake with a dolphin figure from Hobby lobby on top. Shark cake? Shark figure from Hobby Lobby on top of blue cake. And so (I bet you can see where I’m going here) wolf theme cake would be a few wolf figures on top of a grey cake.
We’ve done a nature walk at a party before actually- and I made various nature item bingo cards to check off as they walk with little golf pencils. I found adding in an activity and twinge of competition helped keep it fun for them- though you have to remember what a novelty the outdoors is to so many kids- they’ll love it anyway.
And they’re 10 not 3- you don’t need so many adults for wrangling- they won’t all go bolting in various directions like toddlers, I promise.
I think a nice plant for their garden would be perfect- but then I’m a gardner so I guess I would. A nice rose, peony, etc etc that you know does really well in the area would be such a nice gift.
My now fifteen year old was OBSESSED with wolves for years and we did many wolf themed parties involving masks and scavenger hunts and, you know, pictures of wolves everywhere. Don’t underestimate the power of decorations to set the tone!
Re: Girls Weekend- book a house in a moderately convenient city. Book a chef to come to the house to do a fun cooking activity like sushi preparation or whatever. (This is a thing that should be googleable like “Chicago chef private cooking lesson.) Book an escape room for the second day. If there’s a third day, find a museum or a local botanical garden. Your theme is “yay, we aren’t at home cooking and cleaning!”
Re: Birthday party- book the pavilion or whatever at the local park. For your nature walk, either print out scavenger hunt cards from the internet for your local area or get empty egg cartons and paint the insides a bunch of different colors and the kids have to find a nature thing that matches each color. In fact, have Carla do that. That is a perfect project for her. To make it wolf themed, buy wolf ears in bulk online and wolf paper plates and a small plastic wolf to set on top of the cake which will be gray. Copy Disney’s gray frosting (try the gray stuff, it’s delicious, don’t believe me? ask the dishes) which I am 95% sure is made with ground up cookies and cream and 99% sure that there will be copycat recipes online for. Definitely ask the friend who offered for help (I was thinking “I wish I lived there, I would go help” and then I read that someone had offered and I would offer and I would mean it. She means it too.) Don’t over schedule them. I just took a bunch of ten year olds on a field trip and they were required by school to write me thank you notes and every single one of them mentioned how much fun it was that I let them play tag during lunch. So just give them some nice open space and cake and let them run around.
Re: housewarming gift: get them a handful of gift cards to local restaurants. It’s less “here’s the money for dinner” and more “here, try all these fun restaurants nearby your new house!”
Re: socks. Throw them all away. Buy two new packs of plain socks that match. Wear them until they start getting holes. Throw away each sock that has a hole as holes develop. When you get down to not enough socks, throw that whole batch away and get another two new packs. I am currently wearing Hanes socks and they are fine but the real secret is all matching and all the same amount old.
So much happening and so many good questions and replies! I love the sock question – I have struggled with my sock situation for ages. A few years ago I asked only for socks for Christmas and it was great but of course they all started to wear through at the same time and I decided it was time to upgrade. I have two FAVOURITE pairs of socks, both of which were super expensive but have lasted ages and I realized that if I really really loved my expensive socks then maybe it was worth sinking some money into socks? so in January I bought 5 pairs of Stance socks and I really love them, they’re just as bright and vibrant now as they were in January. I think they were on sale for about £12 a pair so definitely not cheap but it’s £60 I do not regret spending at all.
I have heard good things about Darn Tough and also like Smartwool, but Stance have cool patterns and colors and I like a colorful sock.
Sorry I don’t have advice on gifts or nature walks, but Carla sounds awesome.
I can see you’ve gotten some GREAT suggestions here! I’ll just tell you what I would do if I were you (after totally freaking out like you are.) I just googled “wolf birthday party” and all sorts of things came up, including inexpensive decorations and cake toppers from amazon. Then, I would book a pavilion at a park that has some nature-y areas, and have the girls do a scavenger hunt/bingo card activity there, with prizes. Possibly a wolf craft if you can find such a thing (painting a figurine or something???). I think a gray cake could work if it had a wolf topper on it. Of course, Carla did specify a “nature walk” so all this would have to be approved by her.
I don’t know why your husband doesn’t trust Airbnb, but we prefer Vrbo. My husband did an airbnb once and it turned out he was just renting a room in someone’s house, and the other person was there. i’m sure that was HIS fault for not reading carefully enough. But I know Vrbo advertises that you get the whole place. I would keep it low-key, kind of like a retreat with preparing meals, watching movies, etc IF YOU CAN GET AWAY WITH THAT. You may not be able to. If not, I’m baffled. But that’s just me- I’ve never done a girl’s weekend, and I rarely go out to do fun exciting things, so… I’m probably not the best person to ask. I’ll be very interested to hear how this all works out!
For the girls weekend, I would consider the Kohler Waters Spa / American Club and the Grand Geneva (both in Wisconsin and close to Chicago). Is Las Vegas a possibility? Most of the hotels have spas, and you could hang out at the pool and see shows even if eating/drinking/gambling are not high on the priority list.
Housewarming gift – I usually get a plant
Socks – Bombas. I got their slippers this year and they are amazing!
For the friend party, what about finding an Airbnb or hotel and then doing a spa MOMENT as an activity, but then just hanging out (board games, cards, movies). It’s a mix of “out and about” and “time to chat and connect” that might be more cost effective AND not depend on food or drink being the draw?
There are so many great ideas in the comments. I like the Chicago and Madison ideas, but there is also a charming town in Wisconsin between Madison and Chicago called Lake Geneva (Wisconsin). They may have spa options that are less expensive than those in larger cities. Abbey Resort is one that I have personally visited and it is very nice. I’ve also heard of a writing retreat in Indiana. I believe it’s an Airbnb. It might be fun to book an Airbnb and spend the weekend reading. Or maybe it’s just my idea of fun…🤣
I’m a big fan of AirBnB’s. Or VRBO’s. whatever they go by these days; we’ve always had good luck with them. Why not rent one that has many bedrooms, near some sights to see. Maybe you could do an ‘in house’ spa evening with a manicurist/facialist coming to you? Maybe a place with a pool, or near a park for walks? So many things could be enjoyable if you are with your friends. I love girls weekends and usually will plan them with only one ‘event’ in mind, and let the rest happen organically. Being a birthday though, you could plan a small party with simple decor, maybe a slideshow of the birthday girl over the years? Who doesn’t love a slideshow?
For girls, I love turning to Etsy when I haven’t a clue. I simply type in a persons interest (say, Butterfly?) and a bazillion things pop up. I got some of the cutest Welcome Mats last year that had cute, clever sayings on them like: I hope you like Big Dogs, etc… I also found beautiful stained glass pieces for friends. Some in the shapes of birds, bees, monstera plants, etc…they made lovely gifts.
Carla. That darling Carla. She came up with a very specific theme, didn’t she? My first thought was to have a scavenger hunt while doing the walk, or a Bingo game of things they find? But what if you swayed Carla do the Nature Walk with ONE good friend, then for her party, you could do something simpler at home or a party venue?
Just my two cents.
Oops, not for *girls. I meant For Gifts, I turn to Etsy.
Wow, you’ve got a lot on your mind right now! And see that you’ve gotten a lot of GREAT suggestions, some of which I will probably (definitely) will repeat.
For the girl’s weekend – depends on the group. But whenever I go to Texas I am perfectly content to sit at the house and “visit” – rather than go places. Maybe you can find a place where you can plan a few group activities and then just let everything “fall where it may” – as in those who want to explore, do so and the others that just want to “visit” do that.
As for Carla’s party – if she wants a nature walk, spice it up with a nature scavenger hunt (who can find this bird, or an oak tree or whatever). I agree, gray icing does not sound appealing – but what if it’s more of a lavender/gray?
For scout leaders/teachers – definitely go with a gift card.
Your parent’s housewarming – what about a personalized welcome mat?
For girls’ weekend – what is the point? To go Do All The Things, or to hang out with each other? I’m guessing to just hang out together, based on what you said, so I’d suggest renting a place in a moderately-easy-to-get-to location and maybe checking out local antique stores, get a pedicure, visit a museum. Arrange for someone else to make you dinner. Watch a bunch of movies and eat popcorn. Sit in a hot tub.
I love airbnb, but I do try to find places that wouldn’t otherwise be someone’s home. There’s a lot of issues with investors buying up all the housing in an area and then turning it into airbnbs and then the local people who need to live there can’t find a place to live. Generally, the giant places with 4 bedrooms are not the places that would otherwise be a starter home.
For housewarming, a welcome mat would be fine, if your parents are welcome mat people. Some of the gifts that I have given in the last few years that have been highly regarded include a weather station, chocolate, a digital picture frame, and hand-knit socks.
My favorite socks are all hand-knit. I am super lucky to have a friend who has knit more than one pair for me. (I have also knit more than one pair for HER, so this evens out. Mostly.) Second favorites are Bombas, then SmartWool.
Instead of a full on nature walk, maybe you could do a nature scavenger hunt at the park? And the kids could go in pairs, and there could be a prize to keep them motivated to find the things and return to the party? A friend of ours did this recently at a nearby state park, c where there are both nature trails and play equipment and picnic shelters and bathrooms within the park.
We recently helped my aunt move into a senior living facility. For housewarming gifts, we replaced some of her more worn items with sort of generic but nice new things- new dish towels, new bath towels, new bath mats, fancy but disposable soap containers, other things we knew from the packing/unpacking process that she would need.
My favorite socks are Bombas brand. The low cut socks have sticky stuff at the heel to keep them on! I’m a fan of their athletic socks and the lower than ankle cut.
I still use air BNB…. Just be careful about the extra fees and read reviews as you are booking. She wants to spend time together…. Would things like a fun jigsaw puzzle and board games that make people laugh or a (not too involved) craft project be more her style?
1. I recently attended a VERY NICE girls’ weekend. What we did was rent a very off-season waterfront house: that is, we went there for the views out the windows, not for actually experiencing the water, and it was VERY INEXPENSIVE because ANYONE ELSE would have wanted to experience the water. We each had our own room. We did potluck/appetizer foods and I worried it wouldn’t work out but also figured we were grown women who could fix that problem locally if needed, and anyway it did work out. We spent the weekend lounging around, playing on our phones, watching TV/movies, and chatting. We went out for dinner one night. Otherwise we did nothing but rest, and take photos of water birds through the windows. If we were doing it again, I’d bring a puzzle, some nail polish, and maybe some sort of silly craft kit (like the color-your-own-plates that used to exist and maybe don’t anymore? you’d actually color on pieces of paper, then mail the papers to the company which would turn them into plates).
2. My protein-powder information is 18 years out of date and also I don’t remember the brands, sooooo…helpful! But, when I was pregnant with the twins, I drank a smoothie with protein powder each day, and the two I liked were ones I found at my local health/raw-foods store, and they were at the lower end of the price range for such things because we did not have much money and we were about to have twins, and one of them claimed to be protein from egg whites, and the other claimed to be protein from brown rice. (I do not think of brown rice as a high protein food, so I don’t know.) Anyway what I remember is that IN A SMOOTHIE (which was full of banana and spinach and other nutrition, so my goal was to drink it AS FAST AS POSSIBLE), I did not taste the egg-white one, and the brown-rice one just added a mild sweetness I found pleasant.
3. If I were planning a wolf party, I would refer to the color (in my head if not to the child) as “silver,” to make it more palatable/festive, and to help me find decor in that color. I think a nature walk and/or owl-pellet event would be delightful, and that no 10-year-old is going to exclaim that it’s boring when they KNEW GOING IN that it was going to be a nature walk; I think instead it is going to start a bird-identification trend in this group. Age 10 is a very nice age (my mom says she would FAR rather have a 4th-grade helper than another adult helper), and I think I could wrangle 10-15 of them with one additional adult; I would go for line-leader/line-ender formation, with frequent head-counts. I would ask if one of the other parents could stay and do that with me; if I didn’t know any of the other parents well enough for that, I would absolutely take a friend up on that offer, and pay her back with lunch out or something.
4. I think Expensive Champagne hits exactly the right note as a housewarming gift for one’s parents. And/or I would keep my ears open for one or the other of them to mention something the house needs. Or if you think they would appreciate it, you could show up with like 50 tulip/daffodil bulbs and a trowel, and offer to plant them.
5. Does your niece play Pokemon Go on a phone/device, by any chance? I ask because if she DOES, the app has the option to make in-app purchases that cost real money. A gift card to spend on Pokemon Go game items has the potential to be a huge thrill, if her parents are not the sort who normally would let her spend money on such things.
6. I wear a size 10 or 10-1/2 size shoe, so most women’s socks are small on me. My recent favorite socks are these from Goodfellow, from the men’s department: https://goto.target.com/eK1gj6
Girl weekend – I would go to Chicago and see SIX and do mani/pedis and other fun Chicago stuff like an architectural tour or shopping.
Carla party – Could you do a zoo party and visit the wolf exhibit? Coordinate a couple of moms to drive everyone or just invite parents to stay? Kind of a nature walk and there’s the carousel and a playground too.
I know gray frosting sounds weird, but when Noah turned ten he wanted a cake that looked like a steel box with bolts, so that’s what Beth made. I think a wolf theme sounds fun. I haven’t checked, but I could usually find decorations, plates, favors, etc from Oriental Trading for any unusual party theme my kids wanted. You just have to shop a la carte instead of buying a package. We did a nature walk/bird identification activity for one of North’s parties. They were five, but I can imagine it working with ten year olds. The kids would probably be better at it. And I think dissecting owl pellets never gets old. I remember North doing it more than once– school, Scouts, maybe a party. I’d just go with what she wants.
Only a couple of bits of advice:
* Kid party: cut the number of invitees down to 6 OR try to get some additional parents along to help. Pick a nearby state or national park that has picnic tables near the trailhead. Have pickup and dropoff be at the trailhead. Start with food, then have the rest of the party be a hike. Bonus points if there’s a small waterfall not too far in and the weather/water status both permit climbing around on rocks.
* Housewarming: get them new locks– for the exterior doors– either regular locks or smart locks with a keypad. They’re going to need to change the locks when they move in, and a smart lock with a keypad makes it easier for if they forget their keys, forget to lock the door (auto-lock option), or you just need to get in during an emergency.
For the girls weekend, I would go to Chicago and rent an air bnb or VRBO. I don’t have any concerns with either but I also live under a rock so maybe there is a news story I’m missing? I would 100% choose that over a hotel! It will cost less and then you have access to a kitchen and don’t have to eat every meal out. The last girls trip I did was years ago when we spent a weekend at a lake cabin in MN – we rented a VRBO, each planned a meal and ate out for dinner, sat on the dock/talked/looked at magazines, and worked on a puzzle. The point of our gathering was to spend time together, though. If you want more excitement, going to Chicago would be great. Like others have said, the architectural tour is amazing as is the FLW home/studio tour. I’ve done that twice.
For the party, a scavenger hunt sounds like a good way to handle the nature walk. Or you could do it w/ Carla and focus on the park aspect for her friend party?
For a girls weekend I’d forget a big city and go to somewhere with a beach that you can walk on. And restaurants with local cuisine. And cute little shops to browse in. And maybe a hotel with a spa in it? Like Savannah GA or Panama City FL? Both lend themselves to easy living and lots of laughs.
As for housewarming gift for your parents, what about lots of gift cards to local restaurants and places, like a pass to the local park system or zoo or whatever is appropriate? It’d give them a reason to go places on their own that they might hesitate going to without a nudge.
I am both sorry and a little glad I’m so late to this party (sorry, was driving) because I’m not sure how much help I would be. The girls weekend stuff sounds frustrating and also kind of funny – she doesn’t drink, she doesn’t eat, she doesn’t hike, well there go my first three suggestions lol, WHO DOESN’T LOVE A WALKING FOOD TOUR WITH DRINKS oh shit. I agree, the person that vetoed can offer some suggestions now. I think NYC would be a blast, just pick a show, any show, I didn’t think I’d love Priscilla Queen of the Desert but I did, and big cities are intimidating but if you’re with your friends and don’t care about looking stupid or having to ask questions it’s fine, but I don’t know, DO you feel that way with these girlfriends?
I once pulled together what turned out to be a Meatball/Monkey-Bread birthday party that involved watching Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs and baking ten pans of Monkey Bread and I ACTUALLY found pajamas that had both meatballs and monkeys on them for a present, but it almost broke me, so yeah, I feel you and I am offering nothing but the assurance that someday you won’t have to do this anymore and it will be a massive relief.
OH NO, you have a wolf phobia? Well shit.
My parents moved nearby when the kids were little and it was better than winning the lottery, so YAY. Maybe a framed family picture? Or a fun home item from Redbubble with a favourite theme on it?
Oh, I don’t trust AirBNB, but I never loved the idea of it so my reasons might also be unclear, except it seems more and more people have been less and less enchanted with it in recent years. The two or three times I rented one for Angus and friends it went smashingly well, in all fairness.
Oh, man. This sounds like a series of epic decisions and I would not be able to make ONE of them. That you are facing so many at once… my heart goes out to you. And I kind of bow down in awe. Because, wow. You are giving SO MUCH to so many people – friends, family, Carla…
About the only thing I’m qualified to give ideas on are socks and you’ve gotten good ideas there, so… I’ll just show up and commiserate. <3
Girls’ trips are hard. I appreciate that you want to do something fun for your friend… but it’s best to have everyone who’s going to participate involved. My friend planned her big 4-0 last year by booking herself a 5-day resort stay in Mexico and then “expected” her friends to come along (well, good for her for making that executive decision, but out of like 5-6 people, only one went and it wasn’t me.) It’s great to get together and do something fun but it has to work for everyone.
I love the idea of a wolves themed party… never heard of it but hope you can pull it off for Carla 🙂 (can I come?)
I second Engie’s idea of an address stamp as a housewarming gift. It’s practical and I’ve given it as a gift many times.
P.S. As you can tell – I am commenting in reverse order. I am sorry.