April 26, 2026 by suzanne day by day

Sunday Randomosity: Deep in the Mayhem and It’s Not Yet May

I have tried to write myself into this post several times from several directions, and I’m not getting anywhere. So I’m just jumping right into bullet points. Fair warning: I think I have achieved a new level of unhinged disconnected randomness today. Welcome to my brain.

The week ahead marks the end of April and the beginning of May. That is bonkers. The end-of-year mayhem is well underway and I still haven’t figured out Carla’s summer camp situation. The only thing that is giving me solace about that is that many of her friends’ parents are still trying to figure out summer camp, too. You know what else I haven’t figured out at all? Carla’s birthday situation. Zero progress since I last fretted about both summer camp and her birthday at the end of March. ZERO. Same story with our summer travel plans. My husband has checked out some books from the library about our destinations, but that’s as far as we’ve gotten. I NEED SOMEONE TO MAKE SOME DECISIONS AROUND HERE AND I NEED IT TO NOT BE ME.

Do you ever dream about other bloggers? I have had dreams recently about TWO of my favorite bloggers, and I wonder WHAT they are trying to tell me. The dreams, not the bloggers. Presumably the bloggers are not trying to speak to me through dreams. (Okay, I am interrupting this bullet point because I am having the strongest sense of déjà vu, as though I have written this exact thing before. Have I? If so, I’m sorry! I feel unable to come up with blog topics lately, but if I’m so uninspired I’m repeating myself verbatim, well, that’s a new low.) In my most recent dream, the blogger was MISSING, and that was quite upsetting. Like, she’d just disappeared from her home and no one was able to contact her. WHAT DOES IT MEAN?

I have a Big Cleaning and Organization Project ahead of me. As usual, I have handled my feelings of dread about this project by pretending that buying the exact right combination of organizational tools and items will effect an immediate and permanent personality and behavior change. Like if maybe adding a second and third laundry bin will prevent laundry from ending up on the floor. Lack of accessible bins is definitely the problem. The rational part of my brain understands that I am being ridiculous. But there is also a little hopeful part that thinks, maybe having additional homes for very specific things WILL help.

Our house suffered some storm damage recently. Nothing emergent, although it does seem like we will need a new roof and siding good times woo hoo yay. After the storm, our neighborhood was immediately suffused with people from contracting companies trying to get our business. One afternoon the doorbell rang so frequently I was sure there was a LINE outside my house, with contractors taking turns handing out their business cards like bizarre-o trick-or-treaters. My husband got a referral for a contractor that a colleague had used previously, and I called him, and he came over right away and walked me through the damage and the process of working with the insurance company to start the repair/replacement process. But then, after talking with my husband and parents and some friends whose home were similarly affected, I reached out to another contractor to come give his assessment. Both contractors were very nice and knowledgeable and patient. Both have local companies. Both came with recommendations. But the second guy has so much more experience. Like… decades, while the first guy has only been in this business for two years. My husband and I are leaning toward the second guy, but I feel TERRIBLE. I mean, I was the one who reached out to the first guy! He was so helpful! And now I have to tell him we’re going with someone else? Maybe the first guy would be the better option – presumably he’s new and hungry and eager to prove himself and develop a customer base. But the second guy is well established and has the capacity and the experience to handle our project. ARGH.

Have you seen This Is a Gardening Show? My family started watching it after we could not decide on a family movie, and it is DARLING. I admit that I am not the biggest Zach Galifianakis fan; his humor is hit or miss with me. But this show has bite-size episodes about some sliver of agrarian life, and I love it. I have already learned so much! Like, you can’t grow apples from seeds! And you should never water tomatoes from the top! Also, there is this kid in one of the episodes who is either highly imaginative or an expert at messing with people. I want him to have his own series.

The other show I am watching lately could not be more different from TIAGS, in tone or content. It’s Something Very Bad Is Going to Happen and it’s gory and horrifying and I love it. I do have to follow each episode with a palate cleanser, though. Usually an episode of Rooster if it’s not too late, or something benign and soothing like House Hunters. Sitting in smug judgment of strangers who are willing to obliterate their housing budgets for things I deem pointless never gets old.

What do you do with hair sloughage in the shower? Yes, this is a revolting topic but I feel like it’s one we all deal with so I’m Going There. Some people rinse any stray hairs off of their fingers onto the floor while they shower, then, after drying, collect the whole disgusting clump with a tissue which they throw in the trash. Some people choose instead to drape strands of hair onto the wall of the shower, where they adhere, sometimes forever. Either option makes me strongly consider pursuing a life of baldness. I am considering making this purchase for the members of my family who fall into the wall décor camp. (I am not buying a tub shroom; I can hardly even think about a tub shroom without gagging.)

MOVING ON TO A FAR LESS REPULSIVE (BUT FAR HAIRIER) TOPIC: The cat continues to be magnificent. He is in a phase of being completely inscrutable. He is usually the strong but silent type, so when he meows, I react immediately. But… I don’t know what he wants. He has been extra playful lately, so I got him some new toys for his beloved fishing pole. He seems to like the dragonflies just fine, but he adores the grasshopper. Or wants very much to eat it, sometimes the difference is difficult to discern. He has also been sitting in new places. Like, instead of sitting solely in his window perch, he has been lounging on my office chair more and more lately. Does that… mean something? And he’s been sleeping with me very inconsistently. Some nights, he’s snuggled up against my legs like normal, and other nights he never visits at all. What does that MEAN? What are you trying to TELL ME?

It feels like 98% of this post is a rehash of things I have already talked about before. So why not discuss my forearm? Looks like I first mentioned it here on the ol’ blog back in mid-March, by which point it had been bothering me for a few months. It continues to bother me. It hurts when I do the dumbest things. The other day I was grinding pepper with a pepper grinder, which sent pain shooting down my wrist into my elbow. The affected arm wasn’t even the one that was twisting the pepper grinder! It was the stabilizing arm! Lifting a bowl out of a cupboard is a no-go. Holding grocery bags is a joke. I have fully given up on weight training which makes me feel like my muscles are getting soggy. I finally went to the doctor who diagnosed tennis elbow (I have never once played tennis) and is throwing all the things at it since it’s been bugging me for so long: steroid, NSAID topical gel, physical therapy. I even got a nice shiny referral to ortho if the other methods don’t work. My dad noted that tennis elbow is similar to plantar fasciitis, in that the only really treatment is time. BLARGH. I do not want to hear that. I want to treat it and have it GO AWAY.

I have been a terrible non-participant in Elisabeth’s latest round of the CBWC. Our weather has been so up and down – one day, it’s 78F/25.5C and sunny, the next it’s 40F/4.4C and pouring, the next we have hail and impenetrable fog – and it feels like I am either in the car or at Sports Events, although that’s probably not true. Well, falling off the walking wagon is a personal failing that is correctable and I have not corrected it. When I have made it outside, usually thanks to my writing partner or my parents, I find myself overwhelmed by the beauty of the world around me. If only I could remember in the moment that being in nature and moving my body make everything better.

When I was at Home Goods ogling the organizational merch, I came across these pieces of art that I thought would be PERFECT for my kid’s room. The cheetah in the bathrobe is, I think, hilarious. (Carla’s response was, “What in the AI is that?”)

December 4, 2022 by suzanne day by day

Sunday Randomosity: Mainly About TV But Also a Little Christmassy with a Soupçon of Melancholy Edition

I seem to have a bit of a NaBloPoMo hangover, and I MISS EVERYONE.

It is early and I am awake, so here’s some Randomosity for you this Sunday morning:

I have yet to put up a single Christmas decoration.
However, Carla and I have begun reading Christmas stories. She rejected the Christmas countdown reading calendar, which makes me sad. Her reasoning was that she doesn’t like being “forced” to read things, which… girl. It’s a paper calendar. We can have the calendar and color it and ignore every single word on it and no one will know or care. But she hasn’t really figured out the line between Follow The Rules and Some Rules Can Be Bent yet, and I suppose for now it’s better that she leans to the left on this one.
I’ve collected a few books from the library but for now I am reading The Best Christmas Pageant Ever by Barbara Robinson to her. She seems to enjoy it so far – it is quite humorous. I had forgotten that there’s quite a long section about making fun of fat kids, which is so gross. I feigned a coughing attack while I quickly skimmed the text until I got to a less objectionable passage. “Wow, you should win a world record for that,” Carla remarked. I’m not sure she meant I should win a world record for the subterfuge or for the coughing attack, although I hope she meant the latter.
It’s not typical that I censor my kid’s books. Sometimes I read her things that were once, unbelievably, acceptable and use them as Instructive Moments. But sometimes I just want to read a book to my kid.
We’ve had a nicely Christmassy weekend so far. Yesterday, we delivered the letter she wrote to Santa; there’s a special mailbox in a nearby town and we go there every year. Sometimes, an elf will send her a letter in return which I think is so magical. Then we bought a gift for a friend and a couple of gifts for her cousin. Afterward, we came home and watched two Christmas movies, back to back.

The first movie was Spirited, starring Octavia Spencer and Will Ferrell and Ryan Reynolds. I was not looking forward to it, I’ll be honest. First of all, it’s a new take on A Christmas Carol. Secondly, it’s a musical which is not usually my favorite genre. But it was so cute. I ended up loving it. It was a fresher version of the story than I’ve seen before, plus the songs were really cute and catchy. And there was a nice wholesome Christmassy message. Also: Octavia Spencer. She was a secondary character, which is a misuse of her considerable talent, but she kicked butt in the role and is just so adorable. It wasn’t quite appropriate for Carla, but it worked out okay.
After that, Carla watched The Nightmare Before Christmas and I played games on my phone and then made us all cheese and cracker plates for dinner. An ideal Saturday.
Once Carla went to bed, I watched Game Night. I think I read about this on a list of “Best Family Movies to Watch at Thanksgiving,” but then realized quickly that it wasn’t appropriate for a) children or b) watching with one’s parents. (This was an accurate assessment.) But as soon as I read about it, I needed to see it. How did I miss it when it came out in 2018? Jason Bateman! Kyle Chandler! Sharon Horgan! Chelsea Peretti! Jeffrey Wright! Other people! It’s about a game night gone horribly wrong and it was thoroughly entertaining. (My husband had no interest in watching it. His loss.) Kirsten Dunst’s husband (Jesse Plemons) was in it as well, playing a wonderfully creepy neighbor. It was not the best movie I’ve ever watched, but it was amusing and entertaining. There was a very uncomfortable scene with a gun, where the characters thought it was fake but it was real, and there was a scene where people seemed like they might vomit, and since those are things that I would want to know before I watch a movie I am sharing them with you now.
Maybe it’s clear that I’ve been trying to distract myself. I think I’m in the middle of losing one of my oldest and dearest friends. I’ve tried to write about it a few times, because it’s been at the forefront of my mind for a couple of months now. But it always comes out so maudlin. Plus, it makes it seem like I don’t realize that a) relationships of all sorts end for a variety of reasons, or b) both parties rarely get a say in the dissolution of a relationship. Plus plus, you only get my side, and of course I think that I should be forgiven, that my friend is misreading the situation or overreacting or not giving me the benefit of the doubt, that my friend is placing too much weight on third party interpretation of the inciting event, that I should be given another chance… which isn’t fair. (And doesn’t everyone feel that way, when they are the cause of a breach?) The thing is, I don’t think I can do anything about it. I’ve done what I can: I apologized, I tried to listen and improve, I’ve tried to show that I still value and want our friendship while trying not to put too much pressure on my friend to forgive and forget. I can’t do anything else. If my friend decides our relationship is unsalvageable, well. I can’t salvage it. I know all this, and yet it’s agonizing and deeply, horribly sad. So. Distraction.
What is everyone watching, TV-wise, these days? My husband and I are between shows. We just finished Dahmer, which was okay – I was appalled to learn how he targeted gay men and men of color, because that was one aspect of the horror he perpetrated that has somehow eluded me. I appreciated that the series tried to devote time to telling the stories of some of the victims, and found their stories very moving. Niecy Nash was amazing in her role. But it also felt like a) there was too much effort to make a serial killer seem sympathetic or blameless for his actions and b) the show was aware how exploitative it was and yet barreled ahead anyway. I am more than ready for something new.
We also recently started watching Station Eleven, after I loved the book so much. The first two episodes have me actively disliking the show, though. They are just too different from the book. I should have waited a bit longer before watching the show, I guess – until the plot isn’t quite so fresh in my mind. Right now, I keep getting very huffy and impatient and “that’s not what happened!” I am sure it is a joy to watch it with me. Everything I’ve heard about it is that the show is really good, though, so I want to give it a chance.
My husband sent me an article that made a compelling argument for watching 1899. It’s about a mysterious ship, people. Enough said. At least, that’s enough for me to want to watch it.
To deviate from TV talk, I bought myself a pair of leggings from Loft on Black Friday. They are SO soft and I love them. So much that I wore them two days in a row. But by the end of the second day, the inner thighs were all pilly and gross. So disappointing. I get that my thighs are generous, but a pair of pants should last more than two days, I think.
I have to go to a holiday party. It’s for my husband’s work, and I get that it’s important for his staff etcetera, but I don’t wanna. Aside from the fact that I don’t like people, I don’t really know any of his colleagues or staff. Plus, I don’t know what to wear. My husband thinks I can just wear any old thing, although my instinct is, of course, to shop my way out my anxiety. Probably what I will do is wear black dress pants and a black blouse or maybe a burgundy sweater I bought more than a year ago for the only other dressy public event I’ve attended since 2019.
But what I WANT to do, aside from exchanging my body and face for someone else’s, is to buy clothes that will transform me into a stylish woman who is at-ease around other humans. Something sparkly would be nice.

In other Things I Am Shopping For news, I am on the hunt for a pair of comfortable boots I can wear while walking in the snow. Note that I did not say “snow boots,” although I wouldn’t be opposed to snow boots. But maybe what I am looking for is a pair of hiking boots? I have a pair of snow boots, and they are warm and comfortable enough, but if I walk around in them for any amount of time they chafe at my heels. A friend and I have pledged to walk every Monday, and another friend and I have pledged to walk on a less regular basis but still outside. So I need good, quality footwear that won’t hurt my feet and will keep them warm and dry.
This is where I say quietly that my feet have been feeling a teeny bit better. I have been babying them for a long time, and then I went for a walk with Friend 2 from the previous paragraph and we ended up walking for nearly five miles. My feet were in agony when I got home, but I stretched them as I do daily, and the next day they felt better than they have in months. So I have made an effort to go for some long walks this week – once for about an hour outside and another time for 90 minutes on my treadmill. I’m not saying I’m cured or anything, but I am cautiously optimistic. Maybe what my feet have been telling me all along is to get off my rear and WALK already.
The other thing I have been doing is wearing shoes in the house. They are brand new shoes that have never seen the light of day, but it still feels very strange to wear shoes IN the house. My dad (who noted matter-of-factly that the only real solution for plantar fasciitis is time, and that no single solution works for everyone) (I was already gloomily getting that sense from everyone’s comments) recommended that I start wearing them. Also, NGS mentioned that she never goes barefoot. I really LIKE going barefoot, but I also like walking around without pain so…
We have been enjoying our Christmas countdown calendars. My husband got the three of us a No Exit calendar, because we like the mystery games. We have to solve little puzzles every day to figure out which door to open up next. Carla got a Jurassic World calendar, and each day she gets a new little figurine. She has two dinosaurs so far and a little person; she isn’t awake yet so I don’t know what she’ll get today.
It’s rare that I’m awake before Carla on a weekend. She can sleep straight through her alarm during the week, but on the weekend when we have nothing to do, she’ll wake up at 6:00 or 7:00 sharp when some internal mechanism reminds her that she can watch TV. But I have been having trouble sleeping lately; I keep waking up too early and not being able to fall back to sleep. Sometimes I just go through phases, but this morning I blame the wind and sadness.
Carla and I are trying to come up with some fun things to do over winter break. So far I have “make zimtsterne and sufganiyot.” I also want to make cranberry crumble bars. Carla and I have tossed around the idea of making chocolates, which was my tradition with my dad when I was a kid and has been something I’ve done inconsistently with Carla. But… there should be other items on the agenda besides baking, probably? What kinds of fun plans do you have for the winter holidays? Are there any traditions you like to do each year?

*These photos are all from prior years, to remind me of how delicious these items are.*

My mother-in-law arrives this afternoon. The house is clean, but could use a quick tidy. We are going out to dinner tonight, so I don’t have to worry about making anything. But I should probably go give Carla’s bathroom a quick once-over and set out the guest towels so it feels fresh. Then perhaps I will address holiday cards and listen to Christmas music.

Well, that’s all I have for you on this blustery first Sunday in December. How is your weekend going so far?

July 26, 2022 by suzanne day by day

Tuesday Randomosity: TV and Phone Calls Edition

I was ALL ready to go for a nice long healthful walk this morning but then I got home from camp dropoff and my foot was already screaming at me, simply from a) driving and b) walking from the car to the door of the house. So I have scrapped the exercise idea and am typing nonsense to you instead.

I cannot find SkinnyPop snack bags anywhere. And by “anywhere” I mean at Target or at the grocery store that offers curbside pickup. I suppose I could go to Costco, but going to Costco is a Whole Thing and I like to put it off as long as possible.
Every few months, my face decides to FREAK THE FREAK OUT and today is that day. Yesterday, it broke out into dozens of little itchy pimply bits, so before I went to bed I washed it really well and then applied a thick layer of Eucerin. Then – and I think this was a mistake, although it’s hard to tell because I have experienced this same Face Freak Out many times and I don’t think I always do this step – I applied some benzoyl peroxide via Q-tip to the afflicted areas. Then I went to sleep. When I woke up, my cheeks and forehead were bright sunburn red and everything was tight and itchy. I washed my face again, applied another thick layer of Eucerin, and now I just have to wait it out. I wonder why it does this? It’s regular enough that I don’t worry (so much) that my face is going to stay this way forever. But it’s irregular enough that I never know what’s going to provoke it. I am washing all my sheets and pillowcases today, though, just in case that helps.
My husband and I are (finally) watching the latest season of Stranger Things. We watched a recap of the series before we started the first episode, and seeing all the seasons condensed into key moments like that made me laugh. The series is SO RIDICULOUS. It sounds absolutely bonker balls. And yet it is so good! I love the characters and I love to hate on their TERRIBLE hair. The danger is palpable and so intense. The acting is pretty great. I love it. This season is VERY intense though.
One of my favorite parts of watching the show is the closed captions. My husband and I have reached that glorious stage of life during which we really PREFER to watch shows/movies with the captions on. But for Stranger Things in particular, the captions for the musical choices bring me great joy. “Intense synth music” it will say, in parentheses. “Eerie stinger.” The adjectives give me life. “Curious synth music” or – my favorite – “inquisitive synth music.” How do I get the job of the person who writes these captions?
After an episode of Stranger Things – or anything that’s intense/scary – I need to have a little mental palate cleanser. Lately, I am watching an episode of Seinfeld. I have been making my way through the whole series over the past year or so, and I’m finally at Season 9. As with most TV shows from the 90s, there are a lot of storylines that are completely cringeworthy now. But so much of it is still so, so funny. And I am constantly reminded that Julia Louis-Dreyfus is one of the great comedic actors of our time. Plus, there are countless guest stars: Aunt Becky! Lorelai Gilmore! Sarah Silverman! Luke Danes! Charlotte York!
I cleaned out my Contacts list on my phone. So many names of people I haven’t talked to in years – a few I haven’t talked to in a decade. A couple of people who are no longer with us; I deleted the entry for my husband’s grandmother, but not the one for my friend. A couple of restaurants from which I used to order takeout when I traveled for a job I left in 2012. Contact info for colleagues from that job and for the job I left in 2016. The number for the psychologist I saw several years ago. Details for various car services in various cities. Phone numbers for several old babysitters. The address and number for the dear woman who took care of Carla in the infant room of her first daycare. The numbers for both daycares she attended. Names and numbers of mothers of some of Carla’s former friends. And so many many names that I no longer recognize AT ALL. Kind of makes me wonder how many phones have me listed as a contact… and how many of those phones’ owners remember me.
The reason I started cleaning out my Contacts List is because I was hunting for a specific number. We have a tree in our yard that is starting to overtake our driveway. The bottommost branches scrape against my husband’s car when he pulls into the garage. I think it’s time to call in a tree expert. And we HAD such a tree expert come in and remove from branches from the defunct telephone wire a couple of years ago… but for the life of me I cannot remember what his name is! There are a couple of candidates in my phone – local numbers with names I don’t recognize. But did Past Me add any helpful notes about who these people were or why I have their numbers? No, she did not. Future Me is changing her ways, though, mark my words! We did have a separate tree service come out and trim the giant oak in our backyard, so I could call them… but it took FOREVER to schedule them to come out, and I don’t particularly want to wait forever. They did do a good job, though. And seemed very knowledgeable and professional.
I am still thinking about the poor cashier at the party supply place. I went in before Carla’s birthday party to order a couple of balloon centerpieces. The place was fairly busy – two people waiting for their balloon orders to be fulfilled, a man in front of me in line, a handful of other people wandering the aisles. But the poor cashier was FRAZZLED. He was doing everything at five times the appropriate speed – like when I asked for a specific balloon, he dashed over to the balloon card catalog and fumbled through the cards trying to find the right balloon, then dropped the balloon on the floor. Then he asked me what other colors I wanted for the centerpiece and I told him, and he swooped over to the area where the centerpiece balloons are kept, but then he grabbed only three instead of four, and had to swoop back to get the fourth, and then he dropped one of those. When he was writing my receipt, his writing was nearly illegible and his hand seemed almost shaky. And then he forgot to give me my credit card back. And then he dropped the pen, and couldn’t get the credit card receipt out of the machine. I felt SO BAD for him. And it wasn’t like there was a big line of people forming behind me. And no one was yelling or tapping their foot impatiently. One woman did come up to him and ask if there were any staff members on the floor, and then asked him where she could find the party games, and he told her. So it seemed busy but not frantic, you know? Maybe this guy was brand new at his job, and nervous because of that? Or maybe he had too much coffee that morning? Or maybe he’d already been yelled at by his boss for being too slow? I don’t know what the deal was, but I felt terrible for him because I know that feeling. I wish there was something I could have done. I wanted to say, “No hurry, I’m not in a rush.” But that seemed condescending, or like it would call attention to his distress. In fact, I couldn’t think of anything that I could say that would soothe him, so I tried to just speak in a low, calm voice and smile in a mild and unhurried way. If he were Carla, I would have suggested that he stop and take a few deep breaths, but I resisted the urge.
I made a new type of pizza sauce yesterday. It’s quite good, so I want to record the recipe somewhere (although this may be a poor place to put it) for future consultation. I put a 28-oz can of tomato puree, 1/4 cup of olive oil, and 12 large leaves of fresh basil into the blender and blended them up. Then I added 2 tablespoons of olive oil and 1 tablespoon of minced garlic to a small pot and heated them gently until the other stuff was done blending. Then I added the contents of the blender to the pot and added approximately 1/3 teaspoon of dried oregano and about 5 shakes of cayenne and stirred everything together. I heated everything through until it started to boil, then I turned the heat off. It was really quite good.
A while back, Wordle “reset” and ended my winning streak. It’s not like I have that impressive a streak (although I have yet to miss a single word) (because I consult my husband if I get stuck and he is AMAZING) (there have been a couple of days when I somehow forgot to do the Wordle though, which I hope we can all agree is not the same as getting one wrong), but I like seeing how many Wordles I’ve completed and how many days it’s been since I last forgot to play. (72 days, before Wordle stopped keeping track.) Now I still get the satisfaction of playing, and it still shows the breakdown of how many times I’ve gotten the answer in 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, or 6 guesses (0, 5, 19, 62, 27, and 13, respectively) but it no longer says how many times I’ve played. I am not a fan of this development.
Okay, I contacted the tree service that took care of our oak. Partly because they are a known entity, and partly because I can EMAIL them instead of calling. Why don’t more companies offer this option?

What’s new with you today?