We are having guests over for dinner in a couple of weeks, and they have some food limitations. It is making meal planning a challenge – but a FUN challenge, because I want to find the correct combination of things that will make it enjoyable for them. The limitations are as follows:
- One family member has celiac disease and cannot eat gluten.
- One family member cannot eat milk products.
- One family member is vegetarian.
I keep thinking of The Perfect Food! and then realizing it is totally not perfect. (Mushroom lasagna! I’ll just use gluten free noodles! Oh wait. Cheese.) The best option I have come up with is a make-your-own-sandwich bar, where we provide lots of meats and cheeses and veggies and breads – and include some gluten-free rolls on a separate plate. But… then again, what might a vegetarian eat on a sandwich? Marinated portabellas? I don’t like sandwiches, so I am not really the best person to plan a sandwich bar, I guess.
Maybe what I am talking myself into is, in fact, a big SALAD bar. Then I can completely skip the bread issue by not having ANY and I can include some chickpeas and kidney beans as proteins for the vegetarian?
But I am learning that gluten is a sneaky bugger, and so I will need to be really careful that none of the dressings have gluten. And now I am thinking, sadly, that maybe children will not be as diggety-down with the salad bar as the adults might be. I can picture my daughter eating a handful of cherry tomatoes and then filling her plate with air. She eats air most days, so it wouldn’t be a big departure but I try not to purposely make food I KNOW she won’t eat.
Okay. So we could… grill hot-dogs and hamburgers and some meat-free burgers or portabella steaks. (I read that hotdogs can have gluten, so I will need to be on the lookout for that.) And have gluten-free buns. And gluten-free-mac-and-cheese for the kids. That seems doable, I suppose. The problem is, always, the weather. Which may or may not cooperate. I would rather have an inside-the-house kind of option, I guess. That also ensures that my husband isn’t stuck at the grill all night.
We could do a taco bar… but we did that the last time we had this family over, and I had black beans as the non-meat protein and even though my vegetarian guest was super gracious and didn’t say ANYTHING, I don’t think it was the most satisfying meal. Plus, I have served tacos the last two times we have hosted people (two separate families, don’t worry) and I am kind of sick of them. I want to flex my hostessing muscles, you know?
I was playing around with the idea of a make-your-own-pizza kind of thing, with gluten-free crust as an option… and providing a bunch of meats and cheeses and vegetables and sauces… But I wonder if the absolutely delicious-sounding-to-ME idea of a rosemary and onion and thin-sliced potato pizza would actually appeal to the dairy-free guest. Plus, the logistics of getting everybody’s pizza into the oven at once or on a rotation that wouldn’t mean half of the people are starving makes me feel a little panicky. Possibly I could make small pizzas for the kids and then two large pizzas for the grown-ups? And both could be vegetarian and dairy free? THAT might be fun!
Then we get to dessert. I am planning to make macarons with jam filling, because they tick all the boxes. And I was thinking about buying a few pints of ice cream (we have a local ice creamery that makes vegan ice cream, which is gluten and dairy free) and having some sprinkles (although around here they are called “jimmies”) and chocolate flakes available. The kids would like that, I think.
I really really like this family. Our kids get along. We have a great time together. And it would be so nice if I could gain some comfort with cooking for them, so we’re not always trying to wrangle our kids at restaurants or having to bring in takeout. And, of course, on the flip side, it would be really nice if they could see me as a TRUSTWORTHY host, who would have things they can ALL eat, things that taste decent and are filling.
I suppose the smart thing would be to just call my friend and ASK HER, but I a) want to figure this out myself and b) don’t want to put her in the situation of being all, “Oh, whatever you do will be fine!” and then not enjoying herself.
So: Do YOU have any experience in making meals for anyone with the above food restrictions? Do you have any experience BEING the person with food restrictions? Do you think my pizza idea is totally crazy? HELP.
How about a salad & baked potato bar (w/ sweet & non sweet potatos)? That way some of the “fixings” would overlap?
Depending on how strict of a vegetarian the guest is, he/she may not eat the grilled item if cooked on the same space as meat products? If you do grill, may I suggest preparing the food for the vegetarian in either foil or one of those aluminum tins on the grill?
uuuuuugggggghhhh. However lovely, these families drive me nuts! I mean…they don’t know that, because I can be gracious even when I’m peeved, but seriously. I’d actually love to know more about how one family with three wildly incompatible food limitations handles it on a day to day basis. Are they able to share meals on a daily basis, or are most mealtimes made up of each member eating something just a little bit different from each other family member? If they ARE able to share meals…what ARE these meals? Do they have a rotation of 3 or 4 things that they cycle through over and over, or have they devised some way to bring real variety to the table?
Anyway, my suggestions are something spaghetti squash or polenta based. Or you zoodles. Zoodles are fun and delicious and even my toddler will eat them, even though he won’t eat zucchni in any other format.
I AM part of one of these families and the answer is 1) we don’t eat at other people’s houses (seriously, we would never accept this invitation) and 2) we eat the same 6 or 7 meals on a rotating basis for dinner and the exact same things for breakfast and lunch every day.
We’re seriously just as peeved about as you are, I promise.
I’m in one of those families, but it’s really all just me (I’m a vegetarian with Celiac who’s allergic to mushrooms, corn and soy). There’s a ton of variety available, especially within certain cuisines that aren’t as meat- and wheat- centered as classic ‘American’ ones (Thai and Indian are my main go-to options), but there are a lot of other things, too. (omlettes as a main dish, GF pasta with a variety of sauces, etc.)
We also do a lot of what Lisa C does – meals where the combining happens at the table, rather than all in one main pot. So long as everyone’s up to speed on the cross-contamination issues, it works out well.
It wasn’t my intention to convey annoyance with my friends – two of the three food restrictions are allergy-related, so can’t be helped. I have asked my friend how she cooks for her family, and didn’t get a straight answer; I think she’s still figuring it out! Must be so complicated, right?!?! Zoodles is a great idea! I wonder if my toddler will try them. 🙂
My husband has celiac and so I have some thoughts. Be ready for a novel.
1) Are you sure the person with celiac will eat what you cook? My husband generally does not eat if it doesn’t come from our kitchen. People can say the ingredients are gluten free, but probably your kitchen is not – gluten sneaks into cracks in wooden spoons, in pots and pans, and probably even some of your serving dishes. If the person isn’t going to eat anyway, put out some cheese and crackers for him or her and call it a day.
My husband is super sensitive to gluten, though, so maybe your guest isn’t as sensitive. I don’t know. I just know that we never accept dinner invitations to other people’s houses for this reason.
2) Gluten-free replacements for “real” food are generally gross. GF buns, pizza crust, pasta (ugh – this is the worst) are just not tasty. You can do polenta pizza or polenta lasagna (although then you run into the cheese issues for the non-dairy person) as good substitutes, but unless you absolutely HAVE to, try to use recipes that are just naturally gluten-free, not that have to be modified.
3) I think sistomax’s idea of a salad/potato bar is the way I would go, too. The kids will probably like it and the vegetarian/non-dairy person can pick what they want.
I will caution you that cross-contamination in buffet-style settings is problematic. If you have bacon bits that have gluten in them and then someone uses that same spoon to get some cheese, the cheese is then contaminated. Or some of the bacon bits might fall into the cheese off someone’s plate. I would personally just make sure everything in the buffet is gluten free and if you’re offering some sort of bun or roll, put them in a different area of the kitchen altogether. Cross-contamination is a bugger.
This is really, really helpful. The celiac disease is a new development, and the most critical (we have hosted before when this family was just dairy/meat-free, so they seem comfortable with that), so I am going to just ask my friend what she would be comfortable with. If she wants to dictate or provide food for the gluten-free family member, that would be fine by me.
This sounds fairly unappealing for summer, but an idea to file away would be a meatless chili. With or without baked potatoes to serve over. Of course, it involves chopping, cooking, etc, so maybe you’d have the issue above of cutting boards/cooking items having gluten residue.
Our entire family loves these stuffed peppers. If anyone is not so fond of bell peppers, the filling is amazing on it’s own, too. And! It turns out this entire blog is gluten-free and vegan, so maybe you could find other ideas. http://thesethingsilove.com/2013/05/spanish-stuffed-peppers/
Stuffed peppers! Genius! And I am going to check out that blog. Thanks!
I was also going to suggest a vegetarian chili and with different toppings available (bacon, cheese, sour cream, tortilla chips)…but I think that should be filed away for winter/fall.
If you wanted to do summer grilling, you could do hamburgers/hotdogs and some sort of black bean burger. You could offer lettuce leaves in place of buns. The blogger Kristin from Iowa Girl Eats is celiac, and so all of her recipes from the last couple of years are gluten-free. Her son also has a dairy allergy, but oddly, she doesn’t post too many dairy-free things. I recently made this Grilled Corn and Avocado salad, which was absolutely delicious and I think would check all your boxes if you use gluten-free pasta (she has lots of recommendations for which gluten-free brands are non-nasty). http://iowagirleats.com/2016/05/25/grilled-corn-and-avocado-pasta-salad-with-chili-lime-dressing/
Does the vegetarian family member eat seafood? Grilled shrimp could be another option.
You sound like such a kind and thoughtful friend. I hope the meal ends up being non-stressful and fun.
Thanks for the blog recommendation! Also – grilled corn and avocado sounds right up my alley.
We are that family. I would bring a dinner I made for my kid with all the anaphylactic allergies, and I suffer in silence and go hungry for myself (I don’t have allergies but a ton of food intolerances. So their food won’t kill me, like it will my kid, but it will make me miserable. I usually carry fruit in my purse alot.) Honestly, our family has so many food restrictions that a) we need a venn diagram to come up with a single food we can all eat, and b) I would never inflict us as dinner guests on someone else. I also wouldn’t trust anyone else to make food for my kid.
I would call your friend and ask what they would like, what are good ideas to have, and would they be more comfortable bringing their own food?
As for what does a family who has these issues do every day–we eat a lot of deconstructed meals. Like I make a lentil soup with just lentils and vegetables, and I put pasta or rice and sausage and parmesan cheese on the table. The carb-free people eat just the soup no pasta filler, but everyone else can put their soup over pasta. The vegan can skip the sausage but everyone else puts it in. The lactose intolerant can skip the parm cheese, etc. There tends to be a lot of single-ingredient dishes on the table, and everyone can take what they want (ie we never eat casseroles).
I am so glad you and NGS brought up the concept of not trusting someone else to cook for your kid. That makes TOTAL sense to me, so I am just going to talk it out with my friend.
I think you should check with the family. That way you can know how to best help them. There is a huge difference between preferences and allergies. Knowing what you are dealing with is very helpful as far as worrying about cross contamination, etc.
Perhaps your meal can cover at least two of the three options and they can handle the most severe one by bringing something safe. Or they can tell you what is possible for all three diners if they would like. I don’t know the severity of the issues being dealt with.
We appreciate it SO MUCH when someone makes an effort, and I hate it when I have to tell someone that the food they went to the time and effort and expense to make isn’t safe for my daughter to eat. We are not offended at all when someone asks if we can bring something comparable for her to enjoy.
Definitely a good point about cross contamination – I was aware of it, but not really thinking through the EXTENT of it, if that makes sense.
Oh! Oh! I love this puzzle! I know a family that has various members anaphylactic-allergic to peanuts, nuts, and dairy, then just sick-allergic to eggs. It delights me to come up with food ideas that work.
I tend to steer Asian in my dairy avoidance: rice, stir fries, hot & sour or egg flower soup are all in (but check the soy sauce for wheat, you know). Spring rolls made with rice wraps are good (and can be done DIY/buffet style if you get the right wraps. My Korean sil does this and it’s great. The wraps are large and you dip them in a plate of water before piling with meat/veg and sealing).
I also love a good ratatouille stew served (wrongly! But so yummily!) over noodles. I chop/salt/drain eggplant, yellow squash, zucchini, mushrooms, then brown them (separately) in LOTS of olive oil and throw into a stewpot with browned onions/garlic. Add a large can of tomatoes and a can of olives and reduce until thick. Going heavy on the oil makes it stick to your ribs and my meat-loving husband doesn’t miss the meat, as long as there’s a starchy carbs served, too.
I also like to do a Cafe Rio style pork salad. Make a sweet pulled pork (I use coke and brown sugar and salt), beans, lime-cilantro rice, tomatillo-lime cilantro ranch dressing, pico de Gallo, tortilla chips, and cheese. If there are enough choices, it can be a great salad or burrito for everyone. Salsa is a great alternative to the dairy dressing, the cheese is good, but not *necessary* with the meat at rice and beans, it’s just a win all around.
Duh! Serve that all on chopped romaine. It’s so good.
Yum – this pork salad sounds amazing!
As a vegetarian with Celiac who’s also allergic to corn, soy + mushrooms, I have much experience being that guest!
Echoing what others have said:
– Do make sure that the person with Celiac is comfortable eating what you’re thinking of. Like NGS’s husband, I’m pretty sensitive to cross-contamination, so I’m always cautious with other folks’ kitchens and often end up drinking and eating before or after. Some people feel that that’s too rude, and choose to risk it/deal with the health consequences later. I can’t imagine *anyone* would begrudge you asking, and it’s doubtful she’d say things were fine if they weren’t. (Especially if you have a few concrete options, and let *her* know that you’d be fine if she’s more comfortable making it pot-luck-ish.)
– Buffet things can totally work, but I’d make sure to have all of the bad-for-some-folks foods in separate areas because of the whole cross-contamination issue.
– I agree with the recommendation to avoid substitute GF products unless they’re ones recommended by your friend. While there are few gross fake meat products out there these days, gross GF products still abound.
– Cross-contamination-wise, if your friend is comfortable with you cooking, these are the things that have tripped my family up in the past:
– jam, peanut butter, mustard, butter – anything where a knife goes back and forth with bread and the container is sadly out for me unless it’s a new package.
– sugar – if you dip a measuring cup into the flour container, then into the sugar, it’s NBD if you’re making a cake, but it’s been enough to get me sick.
– toasters, grills, and anything where the food touches a surface that won’t get washed in between normal uses.
– cutlery drawers near the ‘baking area’ can get floury (admittedly, my family is a bit more lax than most when it comes to cleaning off counters. 🙂 )
You rock for seeing this as a fun challenge! I know that it’s a lot to take on, so please know that I’ve greatly appreciated the people who’ve taken the time to make things safe for me. And that holds true whether the final product was one that they made or one that I brought – the fact that they’re putting the work in so I don’t get sick is the touching part.
I never would have thought about the sugar/flour contamination issue. I am usually weirdly persnickety about that anyway, but I can’t be SURE. So if my friend IS comfortable with me making macarons, for instance, I am going to use fresh sugar and powdered sugar to ensure no flour has been involved at all.
Stir fry with rice! Or other Asian food like pad thai.
This sounds DELICIOUS but it waaaaaay outside my cooking wheelhouse. 🙂
What about roasting a chicken or grilling some chicken breasts and then making a whole bunch of grilled or roasted vegetables which can be served very attractively and can be hearty and some type of big entree salad (I am thinking something with quinoa or some other gluten free grain in it and some type of bean for protein).
That sounds like a GREAT idea – so simple!!! I just need to figure out the “hearty roasted vegetables” and “non meat protein” issue!
I’d make a couple different pans of enchiladas. “Annie Eats” has a great vegetarian enchilada and a similar vegan enchilada. Those plus a more classic (chicken/beef/whatever) and a crisp green salad would be fun!