Some short thoughts for you today, Internet. I know, brevity is unusual for me. Don’t worry – I made up for it in quantity.
- A cardinal’s call sounds like a gun in a really girly video game.
- I have heard that acupuncture is really good for anxiety, but I get anxious just THINKING about acupuncture.
- The worst thing about Fourth of July is the surrounding 4-to-6 week period of random fire-crackering at all hours of the day and night. I do not enjoy playing the game of Fire Cracker or Gun Shot? with my husband when we’re snapped out of sleep at two in the morning, fearing for our lives.
- The best – inexpensive – red wine I’ve had in a long while is the 2010 Michael David Petite Petit Sirah. You’re welcome.
- Sometimes I like to sit in my backyard in my bikini (and shorts) and catch the rays. The neighbor whose backyard touches ours has a 22-year-old daughter, home from college, who also likes to sunbathe in her bikini. So my flabby abs and I stay inside a lot.
- Trader Joe’s microwavable jasmine/basmati rice has changed my life.
- I miss Jill Zarin. And that crazypants Kelly. I do not miss Simon.
- Come to think of it, I miss Paris Geller too.
- There is nothing more exciting than growing actual fruit on actual plants that you actually planted. There is nothing more frustrating than trying to protect them from the neighborhood wildlife. This is not your personal produce section, DEER/CHIPMUNKS/SQUIRRELS/BUNNIES/BIRDS.
- What kind of creature is leaving giant poops in my yard?
- Standing with the fridge door open, looking at a cold can of delicious Diet Coke, imagining that crisp, bubbly elixir of happiness trickling down my throat, and contemplating a night of staring at my ceiling fan while my heart whirs frantically and my brain cycles endlessly through my to-do list is not fun. There is no good option here, folks.
- The other day, I saw two cars with personalized license plates. One said One Soul and the other said Fun Knee. What?
- Why is “exercise more frequently” the solution for so many things and “nachos with a brownie chaser” is the solution for nothing?
- I never thought I’d see this day, but alas: we have run out of bay leaves.
- Tom Selleck as Richard from Friends. Indiana Jones-era Harrison Ford. Bruce Willis any day, any time.
- Fresh strawberries always look so delectable in the store, but by the time I get around to washing them, they are soft and discolored and possibly moldy. (See also: grapes, blueberries, artichokes.)
- I probably go outside in my pajamas more often than I should.
- My couch loses approximately ten zagillion feathers each day. I’m pretty sure the feather supply is infinite, but if it turns out I’m wrong, what do I do? Just… throw out the couch? Which will at that point, obviously, be just a pile of empty fabric rectangles.
- I’m not boycotting them or anything, but I haven’t had an Oreo in about two years. I could really go for an Oreo right now.
- The only book I’ve read – all the way through – since March is 50 Shades of Grey. Make of that what you will.
What are you thinking about today, Internet?
I was skeptical of acupuncture until I was desperate and tried it. I would do it again…in a heartbeat.
Fireworks make a dog crazy. So glad they’re illegal where I live, otherwise, she’d be bald.
I don’t know who any of those people are..I am too old, I guess???
Brownies, Oreos and wine… dreamy!
Why is “exercise more frequently” the solution for so many things and “nachos with a brownie chaser” is the solution for nothing?
Yes, please!
“I miss Jill Zarin. And that crazypants Kelly. I do not miss Simon.”
The lack of crazy Kelly and Jill means I deleted the entire season from my DVR. No thanks RHWNYC, you’re officially too boring for me to care.
NJ, keep it up.
Tom Selleck as Jesse Stone, too, if we’re being honest.
I’ve been told, and so far it’s seemed to be working, that if you wash your berries in almost-boiling water when you get them, they last longer–something about it killing the mold early on, or something?
and did you like 50 Shades of Gray? 😉 I haven’t read it, but I’ll admit to a lot of curiosity!
I do not really like Oreos. I always think I do but then I don’t.
Something is eating my produce too. Grrr.
So much to ponder there. Nachos with a brownie chaser sounds heavenly. Did you like 50 shades? I am 65% through but, but don’t think I will feel compelled to read the rest of the series.
Ah, Richard. Why are my raquetball buddies never like him?
The idea of someone sticking in a needle in my back does not make me think I would be more relaxed afterwards.
1. I watch episodes of The Gilmore Girls like they are crack when my husband is not home. The number of times I have watched the episode where Rory runs away from Jess through the town square cannot be counted. Have you watched Bunheads, the new Amy Sherman Palladino vehicle on ABC Family? We don’t have that channel, but I watched one episode while I was at my inlaws and I want to watch more.
2. If I only read one book in a month, it would NOT be that book. Read The Peach Keeper or City of Bones or Just Listen or The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian instead.
3. I do not like Oreos, either. I prefer my processed junk food in the form of salty things like Cheezits.
I know this is so cruel of me but I really hate the deer and bunnies that are consistently eating everything in my yard. I’m not planting it for them! I may or may not have threatened to sit our on my porch with a bb gun before…
I’m definitely with you on the grocery fruit and pajamas! lol
paris geller!! <3 I miss GG.
i put the strawberries in a bowl of water with a little bit of vinegar and rinse them off and put them in the fridge and they last a lot longer.